December 4th, 2012

Cricket Christmas Party: The 12 WAG Days Of Christmas

pregnant WAG wayne kai son man u

We’ll keep this relatively short and simple, Kickettes. If you’ve judged one Cricket Christmas Party, you’ve judged them all. Or something like that.

WAGs annual party shopping boutiqueThe legendary Liverpool designer boutique that caters to your favorite Northwest WAGs and ours held its annual Christmas shindig last night and it certainly wasn’t lacking in everything you’ve come to know and love and love to make fun of.

First, the outfits. Had Coleen Rooney’s bump been any bigger we would have been forced to make the obvious snake that swallowed a basketball joke.

Luckily she’s still pretty small, but that doesn’t mean we’re totally convinced by this Lanvin dress. She does look very pretty though and the Scouse brows seem to be under control for the time being.


cricket christmas party liverpool 2012 WAGs boutiqueAlex Gerrard was there looking pleased as punch with herself, as usual. Her Stella McCartney dress, Giuseppe Zanotti heels, and Valentino clutch make a nice treble of designer duds and don’t hurt her chances of achieving her lifelong dream of becoming a Kardashian. Or at least looking as much like one of them as possible. She also managed to get the Duchess of Cambridge’s new “it” hair cut in record time. Keep on being yourself, Alex.

Now, we weren’t privy to the goings on inside the party, but we’d like to think we sort of know. Epic amounts of bubbly are likely consumed, canap├ęs went uneaten in an effort to stay thin, and they all talked topically about how fabulous they are.

Also, we’d like to think there’s a proper sing-a-long. Everyone loves Christmas carols so join us now in a rousing rendition of the 12 WAG Days Of Christmas (sung to the tune of this obviously):

Twelve Fake Tans

Eleven Louboutins

Ten Hair Extensions

Nine Pairs Of Spanx

Eight False Eyelashes

Seven Scouse Brows

Six Lanvin Dresses

Five Engagement Rings

Four Push Up Bras

Three Crates Of Booze

Two Prada Clutches

And an accidental pregnancy

Enjoy the festive season, Kickettes!

Related Posts with Thumbnails

23 Responses to “Cricket Christmas Party: The 12 WAG Days Of Christmas”

  1. minecraft 10 says:

    Thank you for for sharing so great thing to us. I definitely enjoying every little bit of it I have you bookmarked to check out new stuff you post nice post, thanks for sharing.

  2. makeexback says:

    I do not like her dress, does not appear to highlight the advantages of his stature

  3. I actually saw her beautiful dresses in it, even though I do not absolutely love her dresses. It really is simply the only love her

  4. friv 6 says:

    Alex Gerrard pictures and I like that style, what she represents and beautiful as this outfit is her crown.

  5. Kizi 4 says:

    Congratulations, they deserve their efforts, and their great

  6. pornake says:

    ROFL, i can imagine this :-j

  7. sohbet says:

    Thank ysdh those plans for world domination (if they involve footballer bo

  8. Thank you, and good luck with those plans for world domination (if they involve footballer bo

  9. kat says:

    Coleen was not EVER "pretty small", she is way too curvy for that. This dress is awful though, no matter who wears it.

  10. Kristina says:

    Alex's dress is awful. Kardashian indeed! She looks good though.

  11. Tasha says:

    Oh those mixed feelings about Alex are coming back.

  12. luise says:

    you do not know what to talk, I guarantee she was fat you criticize more like she's perfect you aranja some motivo pra wing evil. alex simply beautiful.

  13. Agnes Wonka says:

    Is Colleen pregnant? o.O

  14. Carvivlie says:

    Alex's head looks huge…too bobblehead. She needs to put on some weight.

  15. Sara says:

    I don't like Alex's dress though her shoes are nice.Coleen could do better with the outfit,but her make-up is fantastic.

  16. Lara says:

    Marry Christmas already to you kickettes =)
    I love the 12 WAG Days Of funny.
    And I love that this Christmas many ballers have cute little babies to celebrate with =) May god bless everyone!

  17. iii says:

    For once I actually think Alex looks great!

  18. tammyv says:

    Alex's dress is fantastic… love it. Shockingly she looks better than Colleen though the bump makes cute dressing harder

  19. Lone - Brasil says:

    Horror show, with so many gorgeous dresses … Alex Gerrard can go out as a girl of easy virtue!
    Collen please return the snakes … they left you ugly!