December 4th, 2012
Cricket Christmas Party: The 12 WAG Days Of Christmas
We’ll keep this relatively short and simple, Kickettes. If you’ve judged one Cricket Christmas Party, you’ve judged them all. Or something like that.
The legendary Liverpool designer boutique that caters to your favorite Northwest WAGs and ours held its annual Christmas shindig last night and it certainly wasn’t lacking in everything you’ve come to know and love and love to make fun of.
First, the outfits. Had Coleen Rooney’s bump been any bigger we would have been forced to make the obvious snake that swallowed a basketball joke.
Luckily she’s still pretty small, but that doesn’t mean we’re totally convinced by this Lanvin dress. She does look very pretty though and the Scouse brows seem to be under control for the time being.
Alex Gerrard was there looking pleased as punch with herself, as usual. Her Stella McCartney dress, Giuseppe Zanotti heels, and Valentino clutch make a nice treble of designer duds and don’t hurt her chances of achieving her lifelong dream of becoming a Kardashian. Or at least looking as much like one of them as possible. She also managed to get the Duchess of Cambridge’s new “it” hair cut in record time. Keep on being yourself, Alex.
Now, we weren’t privy to the goings on inside the party, but we’d like to think we sort of know. Epic amounts of bubbly are likely consumed, canapés went uneaten in an effort to stay thin, and they all talked topically about how fabulous they are.
Also, we’d like to think there’s a proper sing-a-long. Everyone loves Christmas carols so join us now in a rousing rendition of the 12 WAG Days Of Christmas (sung to the tune of this obviously):
Twelve Fake Tans
Ten Hair Extensions
Nine Pairs Of Spanx
Eight False Eyelashes
Seven Scouse Brows
Six Lanvin Dresses
Five Engagement Rings
Four Push Up Bras
Three Crates Of Booze
Two Prada Clutches
And an accidental pregnancy
Enjoy the festive season, Kickettes!