November 4th, 2010

Cristiano Ronaldo: On Safari? Perhaps Not

Image: Nike via

As we bask in the full horror** of Cristiano Ronaldo’s ‘exciting’ new Nike ‘Safari’ boots, many thoughts cross our collective and extremely fashion sensitive consciousness. Would anyone be foolish enough to wear these on safari? Actually, would anyone (apart from Ronnie, that is) be foolish to enough to wear them on a football pitch? And why do they bear such an alarming resemblance to these Alaia boots (left), as spotted by one of our eagle eyed staffers on

Amusingly, this isn’t the only controversy that C-Ron’s new shoes have caused. The word is that Real Madrid may be unable to take part in this weekend’s African Safari campaign involving the use of a ‘Safari’ football, due to the boots bearing an unnerving resemblance to the leather sphere in question. League officials have stated that other players may think they are ‘tackling or kicking the ball’ and end up whacking the orange one instead.

Note to La Liga officials. We reckon that a) Atletico Madrid players will not be in need of an excuse to boot Cris and b) anyone capable of designing and wearing said boot is clearly more than capable of looking after himself.


**Disclaimer. One person in the Kickette office gets ‘footie boot porn’. The rest of us occupy the rather more traditional female position of being totally underwhelmed when confronted with a set of cleats, no matter how shiny. Should we ostracize our errant colleague or support her right to be weird different. Tell us, Kickettes!

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35 Responses to “Cristiano Ronaldo: On Safari? Perhaps Not”

  1. alf says:

    by the way, i am one of those few women who enjoy a good pair of cleats.
    but these safaris make me cringe….

  2. alf says:

    love the comparison to the Alaia boots!!!

  3. Sarah, Madrid says:

    OU-gly! I dont get how is this aspired by safari?!

  4. @AgnesWonka says:

    I like CR boots, they're cool!

  5. iza says:

    looks more like oreo mc flurry than safari to me…

  6. lvgirl says:

    they've been dubbed the dalmation boots at work. i tried them on and wasn't impressed, they looked more paint splattered than animal print

  7. GracieB says:

    that is the most ugliest soccer shoes i have ever seen. shame on Nike and most especially CR!

  8. Emme says:

    This is hardly the worst of Cristiano's crimes against fashion. Remember those awful shoes he wore with the shiny trousers? I kind of like that football boots have evolved from the traditional Adidas black with three white stripes. I like the pink boots better. Wonder if Nike has anything special in store for Ozil now that he is at Real Madrid.

  9. VS1986 says:

    CR even if you wore shoes with holes I will still love you <3

  10. rubyqueen says:

    ewww them boots are seriously ugly both of them.!!!

  11. WAG2BE says:

    AWWWWW THEYR POLKA DOTS!!!!!!!! its nice to see cristiano hasnt forgotten the little girls in the world that love soccer….(for those who havent noticed this IS sarcasm)

  12. Zinny says:

    I think they're lovely, actually! I'd wear them and I don't even play football!
    Cris may not have the best style in the world but these are truly wonderful and unique.

  13. JVD says:

    ROTFL! I looked at both pictures before I read the post and for a minute I thought he had a version with heels! Those boots are f-ing awful, but now they don't look so bad when I compare them to the super-fly shoe I thought he was selling.

    That picture reminds me of his watch ad pictures with the raised brow. Why has promoting watches/shoe's suddenly turned CR7 quizzical???

  14. Lumi says:

    i like these boots but nothing beats his pink cleats.

  15. lorena_yGp says:

    Only Cris can pull THIS off :-) Ohhh Cris that's why we love you :-)

  16. Jo_ says:

    I'd personally go for the Alaia ballet flats in that pattern ( but I think the heels and Cris' boots are nice. They grew on me.

    And considering the shoe porn that's usually trafficked on this site, no judgies on the lone staffer. :D

  17. aps says:

    I really like the Alaia boots. Can't wait to see the cleats on his feet.

  18. Summer says:

    Fantastic shoes (I adore them), unfortunately I can say the same about the man!!!

  19. senora ramos says:

    wow ronnie. horrible, but what else can we expect from you? lol! that would be like being shocked if sergio designed some fashionably horrible…well, anything. just par for the course.
    and lol kickette…loved the line about atleti not needing an excuse. funny b/c it's true!

  20. jen says:

    I'm holding out for the black velvet cleats…YOU KNOW he will design them eventually.

  21. Maribel says:

    He's so hot that I almost didn't even notice that shoe in the picture!

  22. Missy Manchester says:

    CRon's Safari boots just don't look intimidating. They don't even look shocking (like neon pink does). The pattern just… looks… pretty. Maybe if the boot was gold instead of white…then the spots would wilder–like leopards.

    It all boils down to this…

    If you can't picture Nemanja Vidic wearing them…then they haven't been properly robotested for real(man) world application.

  23. shay says:

    I seriously doubt he had much to say about the design of these asstastic boots. Pay me millions I will wear them too. At least he drew the line at the "rose" colored boots that Bendtner is still taking heat about.

  24. I love footy boots reviews! :D Let her be!

  25. CarmenOcio says:

    It kinda looks as if a 5 year old was let loose with some crayolas….

  26. Simone says:

    i really like these boots and if anyone can pull them of it's C Ron, maybe it's going to confuse his opponents.

  27. Leya_S says:

    I don't mind footie boot porn, but are these boots for SERIOUS??

    Oh wait, okay, they're not ACTUALLY bedazzled, thank Jesus Navas. *wipes brow* I clicked the link to confirm…………but I still don't like them. I understand that boots don't JUST need to be utilitarian and they SHOULD look good but the problem is that these…well, they don't. I think they should have gone with some cool tiger stripes or something, idk…

  28. Thea says:

    Let's be honest – C-RON (AKA the Situation) is hardly a beacon of class, style or good taste!

    • hereforthenando says:

      Isn't that why we love him, though? I know that for me, every time he wears a flower in his hair or wears another pair of metallic short-shorts, it makes him all the more endearing.

      • littlegirl says:

        you're right girl…the same thing i was thinking!

        if he wasn't so "passion for fashion" he would be a normal good footballer…and then, how we culd have fun????

    • sarrible says:

      More like The Snituation. Epic pouting!

  29. Barbiegirl says:

    Note to La Liga officials. We reckon that a) Atletico Madrid players will not be in need of an excuse to boot Cris and b) anyone capable of designing and wearing said boot is clearly more than capable of looking after himself.
    Love it!!

    I think i might like these boots!!