September 30th, 2011
David de Gea: Lock Up Your Donuts!
Sorry. We couldn’t help ourselves. Original image: REUTERS/Darren Staples.
We’ve all been tempted, Kickettes. But theft, even when it involves staples of life like glazed Krispy Kreme donuts, is a crime.
David de Gea knows this now, having been apprehended by security officers after he was allegedly filmed on CCTV pilfering a pastry from an English supermarket. Reports state that the baby faced ‘keeper and two friends ‘swaggered into the store, chatting loudly in Spanish’ and then left without even trying to pay.
We can only assume that David’s preparation for life in the EPL involved a telephone conversation with that other famed confectionary enthusiast, Cesc Fabregas, whose excitement at the ‘donut disco’ may have allowed the issue of payment to slip his mind.
We think that to celebrate this outbreak of criminal awesomeness in the EPL you should all go out and buy yourself a box of frosted fat cakes. Note what we said there? Buy. Not steal.
We’ve got our own problems, without being convicted of being accessories to sugar swindling.