March 15th, 2012

Emerging From The Darkness: Mike Havenaar, Vitesse

Image: Dean Mouhtaropoulos/Getty Images Europe.

Check out this mofo hottie, Kickettes!

His name is Mike Havenaar, he was born in Japan to Dutch parents, is a Japanese national and plays for their NT. When he not doing that, he’s out representin’ for Vitesse in the Dutch Eredivisie.

We’re sorry, Japanese & Dutch Kickettes. But you couldn’t expect to keep this rather juicy cut of manmeat to yourselves forever.

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34 Responses to “Emerging From The Darkness: Mike Havenaar, Vitesse”

  1. Will says:

    i would let my daughter marry this guy….

  2. kumiko says:

    Being of Dutch and Japanese blood, I feel like he was made for me haha! Just read the comment above about him being married, dashed my dreams right away. :)

  3. SoccerDuckie says:

    Nice, a TCK hottie ballplayer! :) Nice find, Kickette!

  4. camille says:

    this guy is my hero.
    love the japanese nt:)))))))

  5. Reese says:

    i have to say kickette i love you guys to death, but there are LOTS of hotties in the dutch leagues you guys miss! :D it's well worth a careful looksy ;) xx

  6. Vivi says:

    I think he looks like Ashton Kutcher.

  7. hdotpdot says:

    Sorry to be buzzkill, but Havenaar has a wife and child. I'm not joking.

  8. Mumtaz says:

    he's hot. period.

  9. Vivian says:

    He Looks like Ashton Kutcher, don’t you think?

  10. Jayy says:

    If I heard him speak Japanese, I'd probably faint from lust.

    • hdotpdot says:

      He speaks fluent Japanese, he was born and raised in Japan, just youtube him.

      • littlegreenpea says:

        I LOVE people who can speak multiple languages. My first and only relevant example is Xabi Alonso… OH WAIT!! LLORENTE JUST SCORED A GOLAZO!! Have I no shame. I'm supposed to be supporting Manchester United and little Chicharito… IS THAT A PEDOSTACHE ON LOORENTE'S FACE?! I AM GOING INTO ANAPHYLACTIC SHOCK RIGHT NOW.

        • Jayy says:

          OMG when he scored, my heart fluttered. ARE YOU WATCHING THIS LITTLEGREENPEA? :P i cant believe hes been taken off, what the actual F.

          • littlegreenpea says:

            LOL Smalling just came on wearing a hat.
            JAYY YOU SHARE MY PAIN… :(

            • Jayy says:

              LOL Smallings hat is such a fashion statement xD
              I felt physical pain when he was substituted, I kept thinking – why?!?! Why do the hotties always have the least time on the pitch :(

              • littlegreenpea says:

                maybe so they can shave his pedostache…? That's all I got. Therefore, there are no reasons to sub the Lion King.

                • Jayy says:

                  Even a full frontal caveman beard wouldnt make me sustitute that prime piece of hottie :( I hope the Bilbao manager is feeling ashamed – subbing the Lion King twice in a row! Its just not on.

                  • littlegreenpea says:

                    maybe he should stop scoring…? He only seems to sub him when he's playing well. Is he afraid that all 6'5'', 210 lbs. of him is going to fall down and hurt himself??

                    • Jayy says:

                      For such a tall person, Llorente is so elegant *sighs* you think he might have taken ballet when he was younger? Could explain why he's so graceful ;)
                      Yes! I'll accept anything for him to be on the full 90 minutes – even a goal drought :P

                    • littlegreenpea says:

                      I took ballet when I was younger, and I can assure you I am NOT graceful. But maybe ;)

                    • Jayy says:

                      The only dance classes I took were belly dancing and traditional asian dancing – I think I still have my belly dancing outfit somewhere :P
                      :O oh no Llorente might be injured :( hope its not for too long!

                    • littlegreenpea says:

                      If he's out for longer than 2 weeks I will be forced into a state of ice-cream-eating, psych-watching, hysteria-filled depression with a side of swedish house mafia to cheer me up. :( It won't be pretty, let me tell you.

                    • Jayy says:

                      Not even raving like a mad woman will take away the pain and anguish I'll feel if Llorente is badly injured. Stevie G's injury spell put a strain on my tolerance!
                      Oh wow, I can imagine the amount of Ben and Jerrys that will be consumed if this happens.

                    • littlegreenpea says:

                      well he walked off on his own free will… hopefully that's a good sign. Since I'm not a Liverpool fan (I would never!! lol) I wasn't really bothered when Gerrard got hurt. But I WAS really upset when Chicharito kept getting hurt.

                    • Jayy says:

                      Pshhh LFC for life, please dont get me started, I have an innate hatred for Man Utd :P
                      Have you realised that if it werent for our lengthly convos, these pages would have like 15-20 comments tops? but most of them are above 50 comments now. OOOPSIE ;)

                    • littlegreenpea says:

                      probably because we have the best comments EVER!! :)

                    • Jayy says:

                      Our randomness, combined with Llorente analogies, combined with ice cream, just kicks ass ;)

                    • littlegreenpea says:

                      combined with epic Stevie G slides and rants on college life :)

                    • Jayy says:

                      And Batman, hot Welshmen, stringy vests and pedostaches. Although the latter scares me.
                      WHY LLORENTE, WHY? I'm still in a state of emotional shock :(

                    • littlegreenpea says:

                      I'll be in shock until he CUTS IT OFF. Hopefully that will be soon, so I can go back to focusing on my schoolwork.

                    • Jayy says:

                      Yep – I have exams to do Llorente! How would you feel, knowing that my failure to pass was due to your facial hair? THE GUILT!

                    • littlegreenpea says:

                      he'd probably smirk knowingly ;)
                      IT GIVES ME CHILLS.

  11. emma says:

    the vampire-man of my dreams..