March 11th, 2010
Flashing Footballers: The War Against VPL
Thanks to our good friends over at the Arsenal FC Blog for the Nasri spot! Remember folks. If you send us a photo like this, we WILL name and shame. But our readers will adore you. It all evens out.
VPL. The enemy to self respecting footballers everywhere. Luckily, in this great fashion-forward day and age we live in, items like Spanx For Men are available to quickly solve all down-under dilemmas.
Let us discuss in further detail:
Take InternationalJock.com for example. While you might be heading to prison for browsing this site (Ed Note: Sergio told us so), they do offer one of the most extensive thongs, boxers and briefs options around – so players can avoid getting their knickers in a bunch.
For the footballers in need of an ‘enhanced profile and excellent support,’ might we suggest the McDavid Classic Support with FlexCup Ultra. Available in mesh and cotton, its ‘added protection’ will prevent your Polynesian pair from unexpectedly peeking through. Yes, Samir Nasri, we’re talking to you.
On the other cheek, Ergowear’s amazing 3D pouch offers ‘minimal coverage in front and has a centre strap in back for the ultimate provocative affect’. This is the perfect pair for guys who wish to simultaneously abolish that pesky pantie line and lift their short tents to epic proportions.
Note: A quick survey of Kickette HQ says these are our pick for players looking to have a stand-out performance when it really counts. Which, when discussing short tents, is All.The.Time.
Then again, there’s always the tastefully named CockSox Enhancer, which might suit this unidentified (and probably photoshopped) footballer’s style better.
FYI, our homies at Futfanatico sent us that shot. Send them your therapy bills.