March 11th, 2010

Flashing Footballers: The War Against VPL

Thanks to our good friends over at the Arsenal FC Blog for the Nasri spot! Remember folks. If you send us a photo like this, we WILL name and shame. But our readers will adore you. It all evens out.

VPL. The enemy to self respecting footballers everywhere. Luckily, in this great fashion-forward day and age we live in, items like Spanx For Men are available to  quickly solve all down-under dilemmas.

Let us discuss in further detail:

Take InternationalJock.com for example. While you might be heading to prison for browsing this site (Ed Note: Sergio told us so), they do offer one of the most extensive thongs, boxers and briefs options around – so players can avoid getting their knickers in a bunch.

For the footballers in need of an ‘enhanced profile and excellent support,’ might we suggest the McDavid Classic Support with FlexCup Ultra. Available in mesh and cotton, its ‘added protection’ will prevent your Polynesian pair from unexpectedly peeking through. Yes, Samir Nasri, we’re talking to you.

On the other cheek, Ergowear’s amazing 3D pouch offers ‘minimal coverage in front and has a centre strap in back for the ultimate provocative affect’. This is the perfect pair for guys who wish to simultaneously abolish that pesky pantie line and lift their short tents to epic proportions.

Note: A quick survey of Kickette HQ says these are our pick for players looking to have a stand-out performance when it really counts. Which, when discussing short tents, is All.The.Time.

Then again, there’s always the tastefully named CockSox Enhancer, which might suit this unidentified (and probably photoshopped) footballer’s style better.

FYI, our homies at Futfanatico sent us that shot. Send them your therapy bills.

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23 Responses to “Flashing Footballers: The War Against VPL”

  1. Inés says:

    the Samir Nasri pic…*cries of so much laughing* But, I do agree that he’s hot as hell and his thighs are sth awsome to see!
    Ballers shouldn’t wear any undies at all, what do you think?

  2. merve torres says:

    OMG :D jajajaja

  3. afizaa says:

    WooHoo…what a sight…!!! I guess it's Tatiana's under garment…and I guess she's hella proud of it :D :D :D

  4. Kedegree says:

    I can't believe I am writing this, but he should have worn compression shorts.

    And did he lose a bet?

  5. Aisha says:

    I love Nasri, his French and hot! But seriously, the pants and the hair-free thighs?

  6. Jen says:

    Eew. Man up Nasri.

  7. Andrew Weber says:

    I’m glad people enjoyed the photo I sent you V, thanks for the credit too.

    Samir can wear whatever he likes if he’s going to play as well as he did against Burnley and Porto.

    Yew.

  8. Missy Manchester says:

    Now where else in the world would I ever find such importantly relevant news? Thank you Kickette. Your skills in investigative journalism are being put to excellent use. :D :D :D

  9. MrsNesta says:

    I’ll have a McDavid, I’ll have a big McDavid with fries and a coke :)

    • Molly says:

      Lol I love your sayings MrsNesta!!!!! :) You always make me laugh!!

      • MrsNesta says:

        Thanks Molly, but this is what happens when you're single and on a diet……..men and food….you can't think about one without the other lol :)

        • Molly says:

          LOL I get what your saying MrsNesta, I've been on a diet since New Years and I really would love some McDonalds also.

          I'm not single but my boyfriend and I have a complicated relationship lol so its kind of like I'm single.

  10. Blair says:

    Dem some fancy pants!

  11. Elliott says:

    Futfanatico has no clue what you are talking about.

    Maybe some unpaid Spring term intern at our humongous corporate headquarters sent you that pic of their own accord, but…but…but…

  12. Molly says:

    Are those beautiful flowers on Nasri's under garments. Either way I love it!!!!! Thanks, Kickette.

  13. Luvin'Bale says:

    I love you sooooo much Kickette. Who else would bring us such vital and important information?

  14. MrsVermaelen says:

    Am more jealous of his baby smooth skin, not a scar in sight!

  15. MrsVermaelen says:

    you gotta love NASRI for that apparently they are Stade francais undershorts he's a fan of that rugby team! too cute :)

    • Inés says:

      you know what? I was thinking the same thing. I mean, Samir is TOO COOL for us to understand him!

  16. Senorita Iniesta says:

    Aww … Samir, my french sweet heart.

    You just SO made my day …

    Anyway, my grandma just called. She wants her underwear back. Now.