August 25th, 2009
Good Week/Bad Week: Matrimony and Man-love
Judging by the above photo, we’re going to go out on a limb and say that it’s probably a good week every week for Pato’s wife, Sthefany Brito.
Skinless chicken and broccoli
Matilda Mourinho stuck by her man through a second round of cheating rumors and avoided divorce. Silence may be golden, but being photographed in skimpy bikini whilst rockin’ a bod most 18 year-olds would be envious of is the best revenge.
After losing his spot on the 2009 Kickette Elite XI first team, Iker Casillas is fighting back. Left off the pitch due to his lack of posing in his skanties often enough, this classically awkward yet speedo’d video is a great way to get himself reconsidered and back in the game.
Getting things done
Corinthians striker Ronaldo and girlfriend Bia Anthony are expecting baby number two just eight months after the birth of their daughter. Looks like Bia is on the “get it cranking” baby producing schedule. Might as well get all those sleepless nights and nappy changes out of the way in one never-ending four-year period.
Oh, outfit monogamy, we do not support you. We know you’re supposed to be shopping your closet and all, but it would seem that Michela Quattrociocche, Liverpool’s newest WAG, just can’t quit the denim and Uggs combo. Even in the summer heat (or what passes for it in England, anyway). MQ’s repeat outfit performances ain’t proving her Italian fashionista worth and her Fendi handbag is begging for a break. That faint sound we all hear is Alex laughing all the way to Cricket.
Back away from the Kaka, Cristiano. He’s happily married and we’re quite sure he’s already got a boyfriend in Jesus anyway. Ricky may be smiling now because your Dep-gel clues are subtle, but one slip of the man hand and it’s game over. Brolestation is a serious offense, so keep your murses where we can see them and we’ll let this one slide.
Inhabitants of Portugal
Nereida is in town to promote her latest smut mag appearance. First, she got blanked by the world’s number one player (and playa), and now the nude models don’t want her either. Forget swine flu, what about poisonous leaches? We suggest that all natives flee ASAP.
Yogi the bear
We can’t stop dreaming about our fave footballers. During last night’s beauty coma, we envisioned Nemanja Vidic strangling a grizzly with his bare hands just to protect his youngest, Stefan. Thankfully, Ana was not present. Kickettes with ninja-like photoshop skills please step forward. Our fantasy lives need you.