March 30th, 2012
Good Week/Bad Week: Sackings, Special Reports & Semantics
Ibrahim Affellay and a pack of his Barca teammates headed to the DSquared store in Milan earlier today.
There’s some serious weirdness going on in the world of football, Kickettes, and this time it’s got nothing to do with our staffers and their nefarious nocturnal activities.
Well, not all of it, anyway.
Probably need to deal with your own bouff before pointing out the deficiencies in his, RvP. We’re just sayin’. Image via ontd_football.
Happy Hours: The Brazilian authorities have finally relented and agreed to lift the alcohol ban in football stadia for the duration of the World Cup 2014. Sponsors including Budweiser had been pushing for approval of the bill in favour of temporary ban, which faced opposition in Brazil’s parliament. For their part, FIFA are “pleased“. We greet the news with caution and for once, find ourselves in the unusual position of hoping FIFA are right.
For Goodness Sake, Blend!: Finally the matters of real importance in football (i.e the ones that we cover) are being treating with a modicum of seriousness by the football community at large. Please enjoy this special video report on Arsenal defender Carl Jenkinson’s new “wide mohican” haircut, the possible implications for Arsenal’s season, and the stoicism with which the young player has greeted his team and captain’s disapproval. Next week, Fabio Coentrao speaks frankly about tramlines and other weapons of mass distraction employed by Real’s Thighmaster General.
Say What?: Tests on Bolivian farmers have proved the obvious: playing football gives men a boost in testosterone . According to the Daily Star, this explains why footballers are forever getting caught up in sex scandals. Sounds a lot like the Kickette Scientific ManCandy Research Institute‘s brand of random thinking, so we’ll buy it. For now.
Olimpiakos players take note: Undergarments like this are unacceptable in certain parts of South London. Image: AP Photo/Mikhail Metzel.
In-Koming?: Rumour has it that former (alright, alleged) Ronaldo botherer, Kim Kardashian, is continuing her quest to conquer the UK. And this time her target is way bigger than the likes of Wayne Bridge. The reality “star” has apparently arranged a viewing of the Beckham’s former residence, which they recently put up for sale. Our sympathies go out to Beckingham Palace.
In-ter Out-er: Claudio Ranieri finally got his marching orders from Inter Milan this week, after a series of poor results that saw his side dumped out of the Champions League, the Coppa Italia and the Serie A title race. For the time being, youth team coach Andrea Stramaccioni has taken charge, but the number of candidates said to be in line for the high profile job implies his tenure will be brief. Who do you fancy for the job, Kickettes? Literally and figuratively.
Definitely Not Tights: If you’re a real man, wearing tights is a no-no, says Millwall manager Kenny Jackett. However, if you have cold legs (or indeed a hamstring strain) and don’t fancy getting chased around the pitch by a bunch of irate Millwall fans, simply point out that you are wearing “long undershorts” (1:00) and it’ll be ok.
For more incomprehensible reasoning – like why a baboon would win a fight against a badger – check out Kenny’s interview on PopBitch.
Ed Note: After we originally compiled this post, news broke about Stiliyan Petrov’s acute leukemia diagnosis. Petrov played a full 90 minutes in Villa’s game vs. Arsenal on Saturday but felt unwell after the game and underwent tests that revealed the condition. Several players have tweeted messages of goodwill and we know you would like to join us in sending our love and best wishes to Stiliyan and his family at this difficult time.