December 2nd, 2011
Good Week/Bad Week: Trophies & Tiresome Truths
A finely chiselled and beautifully honed conductor of electricity and heat. And the LFP Award for best goalkeeper. Image via totalbarca.
After a busy week that saw Cesc Fabregas crumble under the intense pressure of our whining, a reveal of the strange bathing predilections of the Portuguese NT and a few choice players sharing what they don’t want for Christmas, we are pleased to finally be able to bring you some proper football news.
Yeah right. And we’re giving up cake in December, too.
Image: Getty Images.
Clever Clogging: Don’t expect to be seeing former French NT World Cup winner Lilian Thuram donning a pair of spandex trousers in the near future. He has eschewed the now traditional dancing footballer retirement plan in favour of curating his own art exhibitions. You can now see his ‘Human Zoos: The Invention of the Savage’ at Paris’ Quai Branly. And no, before you ask. It’s nothing to do with Robbie.
Award Warning: Hooray for Barcelona, whose quest to hoover up every trophy in the known universe continued at the Liga Futbol Profesional Awards. Among the winners were Victor Valdes (best goalkeeper), Eric Abidal (best defender), Messi (best striker) and Andres Iniesta (best attacking midfielder). Awesome. As long as they stay away from our Bronze medal for swimming twelve feet in a pair of ill-fitting pyjamas, all will remain well.
Drogba Double: Speaking of amazing accolades, Didier Drogba was the recipient of Beyond Sport’s ‘Humanitarian in Sport’ Award this week, in recognition of his work with the Didier Drogba Foundation. The Chelsea striker also made headlines by rejecting Chelsea’s offer of a one year contract extension, claiming he was going to ‘where he is offered the most money‘. Which we think is perfectly fair, considering he seems to spend most of his earnings on helping people in the Ivory Coast.
You are witnessing an act of extraordinary evil here, Kickettes. Remember that. Image: Michael Regan/Getty Images Europe.
Surreptitious Shilling Fail: Static electricity through his mohawk wasn’t the only thing Emmanual Frimpong managed to attract in Arsenal’s game vs. Manchester City in midweek. The player took off his jersey after exchanging pleasantries with former team-mate Sami Nasri, revealing a slogan on his t-shirt promoting his clothing company, ‘Dench’. This is against FA guidelines, so he can expect a firm telling off at the very least. But at least he made the effort!
Prudent PR: British PR guru Max Clifford has stated that he has been approached by two ‘high-profile’ gay EPL players in the last five years, and advised them not to come out. Clifford, who has shepherded Cheryl Cole, Simon Cowell and Rebecca Loos (among others) through their own PR crises, said a player would need to be ‘a hard man with an established reputation’ to weather the inevitable storm. You already know what we think about this.
Banged To Rights: Finally, bad news for him, but good news for everyone else as Mancini (the Brazilian player, not the Italian manager) was sentenced to two years and eight months for rape. The player, who has turned out for Milan, Inter and Roma, among others) was convicted after an incident involving a young Brazilian woman at his apartment in December 2010. His friend Gerardo Eugenio do Nascimento was sentenced to ten months for trying to coerce the woman into not pressing charges.
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