April 12th, 2010
Kickette Catch-Up: Weekend Cheat Sheet
- Elen is back! After her Tesco’s undie shoots failed to woo Frank, Ms. Rives has stepped up her game and will be appearing on ITV’s, Marco’s Kitchen Burnout. Other Z-list contestants include fellow failed-WAG Nancy Dell’Olio. Elen has mentioned that she’s been skinning rabbits from an early age and revealed the inner workings of her mental chambers as she cited a vital reason why she joined the show: ‘it would be great if it led to a new career.’ At least she’s honest. Set your dvd recorders for Friday at 9pm, this is not to be missed!
- Wolves striker George Elokobi continued doing what he does best: revealing flesh in the name of charity. Ten members of the team took part in a fashion show in aid of the Everyman Cancer Charity. We approve of everything except this shirt but since it’s for a good cause, we won’t snark…
- WAGs united on Saturday to finish off Aintree clad in black style. Coleen Rooney awarded one lucky gal the Matalan ‘Best Dressed Award’.
- A Real Madrid v Barca WAG-off caused major Kickette confusion. Kaka (and us) were left wondering what’s happened to his wife, because that sure ain’t Caroline. Anyone else love Pep Guardiola a considerable amount more after seeing his very normal wife?
- A habitual scene stealer, C-ron also had to be content with second place in Italian mag Cuore’s list of best baller bodies. Becks topped the poll, which also featured Freddie Ljungberg, Frank Lampard and Wayne Rooney. No joke.
-In more Cristiano news, he just can’t keep away from the British girls skanks. Vidas reported that Cron is dating Imogen Thomas, she of Big Brother/ dating Jermain Defoe fame. Imogen has a list of footballer conquests to rival Danielle Lloyd and has clearly adopted Danielle’s proven tactic of ‘ if at first you don’t suceed, try, try again.’
- Cheryl Cole won the hearts of the world’s feminists, declaring in a Norwegian TV interview that her career is what she loves the most. Then she changed her mind. When asked about Ashley, Mrs Cole turned on the waterworks and began repeatedly mentioning the words ‘fight for’ and ‘love’. Subliminal messaging springs to mind.
-Talking of WAGs on tv, the reviews of Abbey Clancy’s appearance on ITV 2′s new show ‘ Parent Trip’ weren’t too impressive. But hey, even her fiancee expected it to be terrible.