January 20th, 2011
Kickette Q&A: ‘Have They Ever?’
Image: FILIPPO MONTEFORTE/AFP/Getty Images. Thx for the spot, A!
Kickettes, do tell: are you familiar with the popular drinking game, ‘Never Have I Ever’?
Yeah, us neither.
But we’ve heard that it’s a good, drunken time, with folks learning more than their fair share of all-too-specific details about fellow party pals’ personal habits.
So we’ve heard.
Completely unrelated: That rumour about us, a suitcase full of Prada and several cute Italian immigration officers in Milan are completely false, btw.
By now you know that our brightest blogging moments are heavily inspired by alcohol. Well, with the help of mimosas this morning, comes the Kickette reincarnation of the aforementioned anti-sobriety game. We’re asking* a host of the superfamoose to answer the question, Have you ever?
Not impressed? That’s okay, you’re probably correct in feeling a tad irritated about the lack of milk and coffee at our disposal this AM, paired with this cleverly-disguised link dump.
But Daniele De Rossi is partially nude, and this begs a few visually informative answers.
*Ed Note: we’re using the term ‘asking’ here loosely, natch.
- Daniele, have you ever considered pulling those shorts lower?
Duh! Thankfully this is an easy one, and one DDR can respond with a resounding ‘YES!’
- Richard Dunne, have you ever contemplated the repercussions of skipping your mandatory court appearance?
Seems like it was too much to ask since the Aston Villa man now faces the prospects of police arrest. Don’t do the crime if you can’t even show up to feign interest in doing the time.
- Carles Puyol, have you ever tried deciphering what your girlfriend’s shirt says?
Our guess is no, as a mirror would be required.
- Frank Lampard, have you ever thought of seeking a new identity in the witness protection program?
If not, you should consider it, now that Katie Price is eager to seek her acrylic claws in your manflesh.
- Cristiano Ronaldo, have you ever spent a long enough period of time with your son to have the chance to change his nappies?
According to Cris, of course he does! He’s not fond of the butt wiping job, though. Of course not!
- Sylvie van der Vaart, have you ever lamented the hardships of being our uber-WAG?
If this were an actual interview, with proper fact checkers et al, we’d hone in on the true, from-the-throat essence of Mrs. VDV’s scoff at the question. She’s the gal who wants it all, remember? There’s no Brian Atwood pump too skyhigh, no Isabel Marant jacket too sparkle-y for this fierce Dutch fireball. FFS, this bish kicked the crap out of cancer, so living the WAG life is the easy part.
Rather, Sylvie believes in powering through the struggle, via the front rows at Mercedes Benz Fashion Week in Germany. Two snaps sweetstuff.
Images: Getty Images Europe.
- Readers (Yes, you! Superfamoose is a made up word, you know) have you ever wondered what life as a footballer is really like?
The Offside Rules would like you to know its eerily akin to uni.