July 1st, 2010
Kickette Men’s Underpants Research Institute: World Cup Study Findings Revealed
Don’t be fooled, dear readers, the Kickette Men’s Underpants Research Institute have had their hands full of World Cup subjects to study. The analysis in still in its early stages but our ever adept premier test subject, Cristiano Ronaldo, has already unearthed the metaphysical formula behind Upside-down Bulge: 1/2 Tight Shorts + 1/4 rear view + 1/4 pose and push.
Even though our findings are currently being reviewed/approved by NASA, we decided to give our loyal readers an advanced preview of the soon-to-be-published study, The Battle Bulge Faces For World Domination.
Image via LIU JIN/AFP/Getty Images.
Safety Tent
Recall your primary days when the rule “no running with scissors” was ignored far and wide. The Netherlands’ Rafael van der Vaart demonstrates safety must always be first. When under stabbies attack, seek shelter in his shorts.
-
Image via Getty Images Europe.
La Cosa Nostra
One player from Greece was coppin’ a Messi to ensure it’s all still there. Verdict? Indeedy, it is. The theme of this grabby guy’s tendencies is based on the inner secret societal workings of the Italian Mafia: keep your friends close, but your enemies’ bulge closer.
-
Image via Michael Regan/Getty Images.
Bulgitation
Gravity – or gravitation – is the force that causes two particles to pull towards each other. In this instance, may the force be with you.
-
Image via VINCENZO PINTO/AFP/Getty Images.
Self-Adjustment Short Ghosts
When players are grabbing their own despite no one being home, our spidey senses tell us that Casper ain’t feeling too friendly some days.
-
Image via Daylife.
Short Tent Soldiers
Simply put, they stand at attention and listen clearly to the biological chain of command. Falling below ranks, is unacceptable but still redeemable.
-
Images via Getty Images.
Reflexolobulgey
When you go to the bang and they bang on your knee, it reacts. Applying that practice of reflexes, Spain’s Sergio Ramos helps bring Portugal’s Fabio Coentrao bulgey bits to life. Fabio also returned the favour to Brazil’s Dani Alves.
Haha, Messi doesn't seem to mind the grabbing at all.
Oh god, I'm dying from laughter here! XD
I'll never be able to look at football in the same way ever again. :<
[...] Kickette Men’s Underpants Research Institute: World Cup Study Findings Revealed (kickette.com) [...]
Ummmm not sure what to say or think but I'm GRATEFUL to have found such a professional and dedicated site. Messi was a big surprise in more ways than one. I too approve this posting and the next to come regarding this important matter which I'm sure if not knighted you shall receive a Nobel Prize for being able to get the ovaries of women of all ages and races to react in positively way without medication resulting in less inferlity.
oh come on! look at Messi & that player! LOL ,LOL! what a good phorographing! LOL , LOL , LOL! calm down player , what are u doing?!! ha ha ha! do u want to … it!! (can u guess?!!!)
I like Rafa’s
Messi has something there….
Nice ass!
He is so damn cute!!!
I think I cried from laughing so hard at this.
How do I apply for a job at the KMURI?
:O dayummm messis one kinda surprised me
we want more!!!!!!!
Stevie G’s member looks more like a pinkie finger than man sausage.
LMFAO i think i just shat my pants lmao
Messi look like he's packing down there. I envy you Antonella.
You need to display these shots of CR9 in all their splendour:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/picturegalleries/…
http://www.tmz.com/2010/06/29/cristiano-ronaldo-w…
Sorry, CR7! Typo from distraction.
Bahaha! Brilliant.
Lord have mercy! Thank you for the links.
Now if anyone can post a pic of Cristiano walking through an airport x-ray machine, that would help us gain a better understanding of just what size pizza we're dealing with LOL.
Absolutely. Brilliant.
Totally unexpected to see Messi in this kinda post but hey, I like it
Stevie G does it for me though … or, they all kinda doin it for me.
somebody help me close my mouth!I like this research alot!
YEAH!!!! This is what i'm talking about!!!
Lol….this is why I think you girls should be knighted!! You bring joy to girls from all walks of life, and you are committed to making this world a better place with institutes such as KMURI, which helps to keep our ovary juices flowing. It must be very hard work sifting through and analyzing so much bulge. I commend you for your commitment to us. You just keep bringing the sunshine on rainy days!!
P.S: RvDV is giving me all sorts of giggles and in the case of Messi, who said small guys can't give big performances?!?!
Messi may be small in height but he definitely isn't small below
mai gawd Kickette that research is impressing! *bows* *drools over the results*
oh kickette, you ladies are so funny!
and so appreciated. i feel a bit lecherous looking at all the man meat.
i also want to say, i’m a bit jealous of leo’s girl. lol! i’ve always heard good things about short guys ;9
I approve this posting.
Also, RvdV is cracking me up.