January 26th, 2011

Kickette’s La Liga WAG Hierarchy: A Masterclass In Medaling

There’s been quite an explosion of high-profile ladies linking up with La Liga stars as of late, and it’s sometimes hard to make sense of the semi-translatable details, no? Google translate has yet to come up with accurate descriptors of things like “glitter Gucci belts” or “short-tents in green jeans”, which can make even the most sedate La Liga loving Kickette frustrated.

Luckily, we are here to help. Both in accurate translations and in judging the WAGs stepping out of your nightmares and into their ‘ballers’ cars.

However, we can’t weigh in on these girls with the same bravado as their English counterparts without an Alex Gerrard-type calling the bish get in line! shots. You see, La Liga’s WAG hierarchy is less a tiered system and more an elevated platform positioning a la the Olympics.

Our levels of scattered heights are judged on the following merits:

  1. Means of Survival = Their Weight In Metal. One must have a job – plain and simple. “Job” is a loosely-used term, of course, and includes one’s ability to leverage their man’s popularity/influence to climb socially, in addition to the standard range of 9-to-5ers and professional performers. Be advised, we’ve purposely omitted the likes of Ana Ortiz (Iniesta), Nagore (Alonso) and so forth because we don’t want to submit their pretty, stay-at-home-Mum bums to such menial debates. We like them just the way they are, and they may arguably be in a league all their own that we don’t have the time, space or energy for right now. Other wives and girlfriends of Spaniards, like Olalla Torres, don’t qualify due to…
  2. Their Man’s Playing Status. He must play in one of the professional Spanish leagues, and ladies are also evaluated on their partners’ quality of team and quantity of playing time.

Before we continue, may we preface the remainder of this post so we can manage your expectations and avoid feeling guilty that we let our readers and non-commenting lurkers down:

  1. One thing we aren’t rating on is their likability. We’d have no WAGs to choose from if that were part of the criteria.
  2. To put things into perspective for the lazy or intoxicated, we’ll also provide you with their English equivalent. This doesn’t mean, however, that if we were holding the English caste to the same accord, that’s where the EPL lovelies would land. It’s merely a comparison for you to hastily topline your judgments.
  3. This is by no means an exhaustive list. You know we have a hard time with odd numbers and uneven organized lists. Consider it more of a starter’s guide, kind of like your trading card collection!

Okay, so is your head spinning mad yet?

Good! Let’s get to it.

-

Gold Medal Girls: The Presenters

Stereotypical Standards: In a country where beautiful women are a plenty, “the presenters” are the Birkin bags: elusive, highly covetable and expensive as all hell. The everyday minutiae of these girls’ lives is painstakingly chronicled as if the planet Earth was on a collision course with a meteor and there was one last chance for a reporter to earn his byline. Thought-leading universities have coined a phenomenon about their ability to make a major, profit-inducing splash wherever they go (See: The Sara Carbonero Effect). In other words, all the other WAGs walk behind them, but never beside them.

Bios (L-R): A newcomer to the WAG scene, Lara Alvarez‘s impending decision to shack up with Sergio Ramos has caused such a national outcry of conflicting views that she’s cemented her WAG de jour title in record time; On the other hand, Telecinco presenter Sara Carbonero first caused a sh*tstorm with an impromptu, on-camera lip-lock featuring the Spanish NT’s captain/goalkeeper. Her hair is sponsored by Pantene Pro-V, while her boobs were (possibly) sponsored by Iker Casillas.

English WAG Equivalents (L-R): Victoria Beckham, (possibly) Bleakley.

-

Silver Medal Stars: The Singers

Stereotypical Standards: These are the girls who remain coy about their private lives, yet have enough self confidence to show some skin for the lads. No matter what level of greatness they seek, these Spanish ‘baller WAGs are still judged upon how they measure up to the superior GMGs.

Under normal circumstances, these women would warrant top marks for their individual celebrity statuses. However, in the wild world of Spanish footy – where couples are barely in the alleged state of affairs – we do not see these ladies fit to hold court in our regal WAG arena.

Bios (L-R): Shakira “My hips didn’t and don’t lie” has a CV that speaks for itself. Which is all the more strange considering the “facts” being reported about her romance with Barcelona’s Gerard Pique: she met his parents and, according to a muttering journo, was seen with his tongue in her ear (?!?) in a restaurant; Edurne is a Spanish pop singer most famous for her sixth place finish in one of the many editions of the Spanish television series Operación Triunfo. Now, with a more impressive 1st place finish in FHM Spain’s poll of the country’s hottest women, she’s emerged from the depths of fledgling pop stardom with Atlético Madrid goalkeeper David de Gea as her consolation mancandy.

English WAG Equivalent (L-R): Bigger than Cheryl Cole could ever imagine (even when she was in her prime and without the loo attendant dramz), Louise Redknapp

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Bronze Medal Babes: The Models

Stereotypical Standards: These tend to be the girls with some designer baggage, perhaps paid for by another, formerly-enticing paycheck power player. More often than not, they’re best known for being “the girlfriend of ___.” It wouldn’t be any stretch of the imagination to say that these are the women who have made careers out of beauty pageants, reality telly or selling their souls to tabloid magazines. Their low medal status is indirectly related to the limited amount of clothes they own and regularly wear.

Bios (L-R): Irina Shayk, she of GQ photoshopped my panties off – I SWEAR! – but here I am topless for DT Magazine – WHOOPSIE!” controversy and girlfriend of everyone’s favourite absentee father, Cristiano Ronaldo; Former Miss Spain, Elisabeth Reyes, is the ex-girlfriend of GMG Lara Alvarez’s current. Her fall from higher graces was slightly softened by her ability to quickly recover with another footballer, Valencia’s Alexis Ruano. He’s not cute enough for us to inquire about his playing time, so we’ll just leave it at that.

EPL WAG Counterparts (L-R): (previous serial ‘baller dater) Gemma Atkinson, Danielle Lloyd.

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161 Responses to “Kickette’s La Liga WAG Hierarchy: A Masterclass In Medaling”

  1. lulu6 says:

    Still can't stop sobbing when looking at Shakira… Sobbing and simultaneously cursing (a little bit… nah, quite a lot!)
    But yeah, "Shaki" should be above the presenters. That's like comparing Ricky Martin (in his closet days) to Ronan Keating.
    (Shakira, he was ours before you saw him!! :P PPPP““`hate youu)

  2. Winnie Mata says:

    googled Alexis Ruano.
    damn gurl…you downgraded!
    of course, i must repect the fact that there's really nowhere else to go after you've been with the Ramos.
    but anyways, he looks like a Ser-hee-oh wannabe
    but of course he's failing miserably…no one can do it like El Ramos.
    NO. ONE.

  3. @CuteNohemi says:

    In Univision.com, They have this article in Spanish: http://entretenimiento.univision.com/lo-ultimo/no… they are saying is that Shakira is oficially moving to Barcelona,Spain to be closer to Pique!

  4. Claire says:

    I really can't see Shakira and Piqué ever being together. I love Shakira.

  5. Claire says:

    As much as I like Nagore for not being a famewhore, why are you all asking why she isn't on the list?
    Didn't you see the "must have a job" bit? The answer is right there.

  6. Zahara says:

    SHAKIRA SHOULD BE GOLD!!AND ON HER OWN!
    i swear that lady is in a league of her own
    and plus shes my female role model!
    if i cant have geri, i would really like shakira to have him
    theyre amazing together.

    also. yay for lara!i like her!

  7. Georgina Sanders says:

    Yup. One of the reasons why I call him my 'Love' is because of his WAG choice. :-)

    Damn. Two weeks of no Kickette because of reviews for CPA licensure exams and this is what I miss! Ugh.

  8. Kaya says:

    So much judging going in this post, I can't even. First of all, to compare Sara and Lara (even though they're both journalists and has a pretty face and dating captains of RM) is ridiculous. I don't hate Lara but for her to achieve "gold medalist" in this regard is like, wow. I honestly don't think there has been a Spanish WAG out there who has been "attacked" the way Sara had been, and I'm not only saying that in Kickette, I mean all over the place which, for that alone, she needs a gold medal with crowns and ribbons and sparkles. So much bad stuff going on and every single thing Iker does wrong, she's "supposedly" to blame. Switzerland defeat? Check. Locker room rift in RM? Check. And now the whole Valdano/Mourinho issue? Check. Might as well blame her for the end of the world. And what did she exactly do? Date everyone's saint and favorite footballer? So much shaking my head. So to put Lara beside her is just… so much shaking my head worthy. What did Lara do anyway? Post some adorable pictures of her in twitter and now everyone's Oh, I like her. Uhm, kay. And Queen Victoria Beckham as Lara's counterpart? You must be freaking kidding me. Where have I been exactly?

    Secondly, Shakira. No words. My head is about to fall off in so much shaking.

    And thirdly, this comment is definitely not to demean the WAGs that don't get exposed over the ones that get exposed over the ones that are overexposed, case in point Sara Carbonero. But to compare them is never a good thing. For one to say Sara/Lara/Irina/insertotherWAGhere whose work doesn't constitute house stuff are worse than the housewife WAGs is unjust. Why do people say that, you don't even know how Nagore/Ollala/Patricia/Carla are in RL. They might be golddiggers in this disguise. Some of them like Ollala, even had boob jobs. Yet people attack Sara for a supposed boob job (which haven't been confirmed or denied btw) because *insert whatever reason here*. Why is Ollala any different then? :/ The only advantage they have over these "medalists"? They are not known!, which is good for them entirely. But to compare these people to those who are actually in the public circle is unfair. As far as I'm concerned, Sara has her own job before Iker met her in the same sense that Victoria Beckham had hers before David met her, in the same sense that Shakira has already built a name for herself before this whole Pique debacle and Irina was a model before Ronaldo came along. And now Lara too, before she even met Sergio. Btw job does not equal popular. If anything, we should be raising our eyebrows at the footballers who "started" the mess they're in, especially with all these judging occurring like you people are way any better than them anyway. I know they've all made their choices though, so who are you guys to judge them for that, it's sad.

    Oh well.

    • Andi says:

      I think Nagore had a boob job too. She used to be literally flat, then all of a sudden (before she had kids) she had this huge heaving chest.
      ~classy~ isn't it?

  9. ashmenon says:

    You're freaking kidding me. Someone in Kickette must have mistaked Shakira's Platinum status for something slightly less shiny and assumed it was silver. No. Just No. The woman is brilliant, beautiful, has a career and status that could outshine all these others put together, AND has a statue of her in her hometown. And she's got an island.

    I'll only agree to her being Silver if one of the Gold girls a) had superpowers, her own comic book, and a space shuttle named after her, b) brought about world peace while training girls worldwide about the proper application of mascara, or c) outqualified Geena Davis for brains, brawn, and talent.

  10. riyaynwa says:

    Nagore is the queen of Spanish wagdom. End of.

  11. @AgnesWonka says:

    really? O_O
    link link link link link please….

  12. @AgnesWonka says:

    oh….you gave me a 50s decade woman there!

  13. @AgnesWonka says:

    I like Sara and Lara (sounds funny)…..they deserve Gold medal! Also like Irina as well, at least she has a job, which she was doing before dating CR!

    I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate Shakira! she's in not WAG officially! you can't just compare her with Cheryl Cole, please!

  14. Wow says:

    Thank you Anon for bring some sanity in this comment section! spot on!

  15. Eleanor says:

    Gutted that Shakira has been listed amongst these nobodies.

  16. Emme says:

    Seriously, Kickette………???? Shakira at silver status?????? With all due respect, there is not a single baller past or present or probably even future that is worthy of her. Not even King Becks. She is entirely above all WAGS. They should all be bowing down to her amazing half-Lebanese/half-Colombian self.

    Though I have nothing against the housewife WAG, to be a Queen WAG I think it's fair to say they have to carve out an identity for themselves outside of their husband/boyfriend. I don't necessarily mean they have to be a TV presenter or model, but doctor, teacher, lawyer, librarian, activist, etc would do.

    Good for David de Gea – he's a hot little baller.

    • Eleanor says:

      "Though I have nothing against the housewife WAG, to be a Queen WAG I think it's fair to say they have to carve out an identity for themselves outside of their husband/boyfriend."

      Exactly!
      I don't know how any of them can stand to be known just for who they're with. I'd hate that.

    • shambla says:

      I agree entirely with your last statement. Women who actually put in time and effort to go to school, get an education and make a name for themselves in my world deserve the credit and respect. So what? because you're dating a footballer you have to go out and starve, become a model/actress, start your own perfume line etc? I heard Llorente is with a doctor that made me happy look at the ones that have been with their women for longer than 5 years I think that says a lot about them especially when they are working class citizens. Olalla and Villas wives have been with their men since they were children so I respect that too. Nagore was in the same friends circle as Xabi way back, Iniestas girl seems like the kind of girl in my group of friends, Capdevillas wife, even Puyol had a great lady for 10 years before he decided to find a model half is age which is fine for now she seems like a cool girl it's unfortunate no one ever pays mind to them. Cool if they are stay at home moms so long as we don't hear about them every 5 hours.

      I'd like to see Iker, Sergio, Cris find women like them when they are nearing the end as we've only seen them with models and tv presenters.

      • shambla says:

        I forgot to mention Arbeloa and Albiol's wives. I think i've only seen a total of 6 pics of them combined

  17. I think Nagore has reached Diamond status in my Wagometer

  18. striker9 says:

    and where are the down to earth gilrs like olalla, carla, patty or naore? they would be my gold medallist…. :D

  19. thomas says:

    huh Shakira a WAG hahahaha never!
    If they are dating, Pique is the MAB

    Btw those presenters wags, never will be in the withe house oval office, or speak to global leaders.

  20. striker9 says:

    and where are the down to earth gilrs like olalla, carla, patty or naore? they would be my gold medallist…. :D

    • ~Ang~ says:

      I agree with you … but remember Olalla and Carla are in England their men don't play in La Liga anymore… soo they would be on the list… BUT I do love all my Spanish NT WAGS!!!

    • @AgnesWonka says:

      please! why do people insist on those 4! they're not important!

  21. Leslie says:

    Antonella is not in uni, she's studying english, not nutrition

  22. anon says:

    lol what's with this nagore bandwagon? before she was in a vogue it was always "ew she looks so old" "he could do better" and so on. but now because vogue wanted her everyone is suddenly in love with her saying how beautiful she is and how she's the best wag (which she can't be because aside from the fact that she isn't trashy she isn't really any different to the rest of them, doesn't have her own career, doesn't do anything of any interest or anything worthy of her being idolized.)
    sheep. the lot of you.

    • Giggles says:

      Thank you! I thought I was going mad there for a second. What's with the Nagore love in? There doesn't really seem to be much to her. Am I missing something?

      • anon says:

        whatever you're missing, i'm missing it too. seriously. from what i can make of these comments, the fact that she has 2 children makes her really special, "in a league of her own" "queen of the wags" etc. how many people have children? and how weird to worship a woman you don't actually know just because you've seen a few photos of her children? some of these comments are just beyond me, i swear. before that vogue shoot nobody gave a damn about her and now they're all acting as if she's the greatest thing on earth. it's crazy.

        now, if shakira really was a wag, that'd be a different matter. she's talented, has her own career. it's women like that that really deserve to be idolized.

        • Eleanor says:

          Anon, it's the Xabi fangirls. They've been brainwashed into thinking he's the classiest, most perfect man to ever live so it only makes sense that his wife is the same.

          She's never done anything public so I honestly don't see how people can know so much about what she's like. Unless of course she's actually this huge celebrity and I've just not noticed.

          I'm waiting till she does more interviews, since she's only done the one, before I decide whether or not she's as amazing people are making her out to be. She seems nice enough.

          P.S. I've seen people mention her kids as a reason they like her before, too. I once asked what's so cool about her because i didn't know anything about her and someone replied "look at her babies!" or something just as stupid. I'm glad I'm not the only one who finds the children of a stranger completely irrelevant.

          • anon says:

            yeah. and also i think i should have clarified in my first comment that i mainly meant tumblr with the bandwagon thing, lol. this site doesn't seem to be so bad. she was always getting bitched about on there but now she's like a goddess to them. i don't get it.

          • @AgnesWonka says:

            well said Eleanor!

          • Kaya says:

            You took the words out of my mouth honestly. Oh my goodness.

    • Crackers says:

      Honey, Kickette has always loved Nagore, and so have Kickette's readers -enough to vote her into the top 5 of a 'favourite WAGs' list last year, long before the Vogue feature came along. The 'ew she looks so old' people were actually a minority as far as I can see.

      As for not having her own career (she used to be a costume designer for the movies), it's slightly unfortunate that you seem to want to run her down for that of all things- as if being a stay-at-home mother with small children is something to be ashamed of.

      But if you can't tell the difference between a few enthusiastically appreciative comments and actually idolising someone, you're really dumb. And that's BEFORE I factor in the fact that you called other readers "sheep".

    • @AgnesWonka says:

      yes! i agree with you mate!

    • Katie says:

      Yes, thank you, there really isn't anything that sets her aside from the rest of them. When it comes down to it they're all the same.

  23. Olivia says:

    Nagore? Sure she looks OK but she can't seriously be considered "superior" just because she comes across as elegant and has 2 kids. A lot of women have kids, it doesn't make them better than anybody else. It's not a talent or an achievement. To me she's just another woman living off somebody elses money, like most other WAGs. At least the other women above have their own jobs and that makes them more respectable. Let's not compare.

  24. Mai says:

    Nagore is in a league of her own. To call her a WAG is an insult

    • Claire says:

      It's insulting to say she's the wife/girlfriend of a footballer? Oh wow, I thought she was married to one. I must be mistaken. Silly me.

  25. ynwahalamadrid says:

    …Nagore is still my very favourite :)

  26. xoWinnie says:

    i think Cannavaro's WAG (Daniela?) is the only one who represents most of the female population today.
    she actually looks like she's matured and aged completely naturally (and without attending the gym–not THAT good, but also relatively normal with a bunch of kids running around). let's face it, most of us would not look like Mamen Sanz after five kids…

    • Alley says:

      That's true and look at Dudek's and Ronaldinhos wives. They have a bit of weight on them like most women would after having a few babies. The other all pin thin a month later.

  27. @SweetNohemi says:

    Shakira does not deserve to be on this list! She is much more famous and powerful than all these women and some players! Make her a "PLATINUM" list only for her! Shakira is known worldwide, is Pique known worldwide too? And she does a lot humane things for this world. I love Shakira!

  28. Love Sergi says:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IdS-mFrWSiY

    Ladies, have any of you seen this video? So HOT!

  29. naylovee says:

    I honestly think Carbonero is trash. & what IS cristiano thinking? Irina Shyak? C'mon now Cris!

    • @AgnesWonka says:

      they're beautiful! that's what they're thinking about. Both Cris and Iker have very good taste, not like Cesc! please….

      • What you on about, mate? Carla is beautiful! just because she doesn't have a gallon of eyeliner on or doesn't do bikini shots, it doesn't make her any less attractive. More so, in fact.

        • @AgnesWonka says:

          she is not attractive imo! she is graceless. Irina has amazing green eyes and a fit body. Her nose is nice, not like Carla's! does that answer to your question?

          • just how is she considered graceless? huh? she's under the radar most of the time, not playing up to the paps at every opportunity she gets (which is more than you can say for Irina).. n ur comment on Irina being bettr because she's got a better nose…Smh. I just wouldn't know where to start.

    • naylovee says:

      Shyak is not attractive in any way. Carla is not the prettiest woman on earth but she is beautifull in her own way which makes her just even more attractive and plus she's been with Cesc forever now. She doesn't try to be under the spotlight in any way, that's why she has my respect. Classy! Carbonero, ugh. I guess someone forgot to take out the trash again.

      • @AgnesWonka says:

        Sara and Irina have beautiful face features and incredible eyes! Also, bodies in good shape. They both have their jobs that had been doing before they met their other halves!

        • Cara says:

          And Carla is a student earning a degree (or earnt one) She didnt want to have to take her clothes off to get men to want her, Cesc feel for her not her Boobs.

          Irina isnt perfect, she's actually a vile creature. Sara is a little better bit still the same!

  30. Alley says:

    In my world Antonella, Ollala, Carla, Nagore would all be my perfect wags. I also like Malena even though she is really young and is a model I love how simple her style is off duty not to mention the girl NEVER wears make up off her job. Seems like the spanish men know how to pick women. Mind you I do like sara and lara and even though they are a step up from models which is a good sign they are also big tv reporters. Now that lara is with sergio I can see a big rise in her career and that might cause conflicts down the road. I just hope in the future both of those men actually find a woman like the previously mentioned wags especially if kids are in mind in the next 2 years cause I doubt either lara or sara would want to sacrifice their careers for motherhood anytime soon.

    btw I don't think we "need" confirmation for sergio and lara pretty sure those pics and them not wanting to comment on each other is enough confirmation not to mention a few fans spotted them out with a real estate agent looking for a new house. Plus if they were just "friends" as others claim i doubt sergio would be sneaking her around.

  31. ALE says:

    I can't believe Shakira is considered to be lower than Sara Pastasauce! Putting them in the same rank* is a already bad, but putting Shakira below Pasta… I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!

    *PS: IS SHAKIRA REALLY, REALLY DATING PIQUE??

  32. Mel says:

    I don't know but I think Shakira is a way very but very far beyond all of those girls…she's Shakira and kind of better than any of those girls for her history and talent…and a way much prettier…
    I don't know about sergio and lara…I saw those shots but I don't really believe on that relationship completely!

  33. Posh says:

    WHATTTTT!!!! IS SHAKIRA REALLY DATING WITH GERARD PIQUE???? IT´S JUST A RUMOR….RIGHT???

  34. Catie says:

    I'm confused as to why Lara Alvarez gets the comparison to Victoria Beckham… perhaps I'm still reeling from her hookup with Sergio (tear), but I think between her and Pastasauce, the latter wins the race. Alvarez has yet to prove herself as anything beyond being a pretty face, according to my uber judgmental WAG standards (huffs and sticks nose in the air).

  35. Emilia says:

    Sergio and Lara were spotted house hunting on the weekend.

  36. Ashley says:

    I can't wait till Irina becomes Mrs. Cristiano Ronaldo, then what will you'll say.

  37. Susana says:

    I'm having a great Wednesday, so I get home and find my way to one of my favorite sites (here), and then I see a photo of JokerFace/PRWhore/UselessNobody…thanks, Kickette!
    At no time would this thing ever make the medal stand unless she had slept her way there…oops…I guess she did. :/

  38. BlackRose says:

    what's with the bias? Two presenters who will have been forgotten in 5 years tops, one of them currently IRRELEVANT and virtually unknown (Lara Álvarez), and you put Shakira second to those girls? You've got to be kidding me…

  39. rubyqueen says:

    i like irina and i know everyone will hate me because of this but i just cannot hate her.she seems harmles and her and cristiano make a lovely couple.:) can i also ask waht does david villa's wife look like.??i have never seen her.!!!

    • aps says:

      U can Google her

    • shani says:

      I LOVE IRINA! Haters gonna hate etc etc

      • rubyqueen says:

        i agree.people are always gonna find a scapegoat to hate and irina is the one right now.just wait untill iker marries sara everyone will be baying for her blood.!!!

        • Wow says:

          @ first they liked Irina, until that cover story, when she talked about how her parents bless her and that women shouldn't by their own gifts something like that. My point is Adrian Lima said something like this before, That she's greatful her parents bless her, alot of these models say things like that, but i guess you 2 r right. it was Sara C now it's Irina time! sit back and enjoy the show!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • ~Ang~ says:

      just google David Villa with wife Patricia … and you will get pictures!!! :)

    • @AgnesWonka says:

      I agree! Irina is bea-u-ti-ful!!!!!

  40. C16 says:

    Shakira a silver medal??? Please!!!! Posh better be careful because Shakira is on her way to stealing the Queen of the WAG's crown!
    Don't get me wrong, I love Victoria but this is SHAKIRA!

  41. Summer says:

    Girls I'm surprised that no one of them (yes also me…unfortunately I forgot to say it) have said that yesterday was XAVI's Birthday…So although I'm in late HAPPY BIRTHDAY XAVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!

  42. mochara says:

    "Wait did 'tongue in ear' kinda give it away?" Yes Shakira, yes it did……….

  43. Anjali says:

    Does anyone know if Pique is really dating Shakira or is it just a load of bull????

    • Summer says:

      I know he has always denied that he's dating with her…He has just said that they are just good friend and no more. But I also know that since he has met her (this summer, on the set of Waka Waka video) this summer they spent and spend so much time together.

  44. sab says:

    What I meant to say is that her agent is with a major modeling firm and they control the rights to her "image". Weither they were taken before or not they still knew they would be used after the "scandal" and on the cover. It's not speculation, it's how the business is run.

  45. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Linda Fan, ipapoo. ipapoo said: Kickette’s La Liga WAG Hierarchy: A Masterclass In Medaling http://tinyurl.com/4b93sbe [...]

  46. sab says:

    I highly doubt they were "stolen" photographs are licensed out to multiple sources all the time. Unless she does not have image rights, which would be very un-smart, she, or her people knew the photos would be used there, in that way. So basically the same endgame, with less work involved.

  47. Cammie says:

    Lara is my favorite out of this group..the prettiest IMO,because she is sweet and natural looking..
    I can't stand JokerSmile, PR loving Irina, and Sara seems Stiff/fake
    Antoniella(Messi) is my favorite WAG..

    • iram says:

      You've hit the nail on the head about what you've said about Sara being 'stiff' . I think she is super sultry and hot. But there seems to be some unease when she speaks or smiles. Something about her charisma doesn't flow natural. It seems like she is trying too hard to be considered cool!

    • @AgnesWonka says:

      who is Joker Smile?

  48. I've got big love for Lara Alvarez! She just seems nice :)

  49. Crackers says:

    Come on Kickette, even by the ranking you use Shakira should outrank EVERYONE on this list- she's a global superstar beyond WAGdom, and her (supposed) man is Pique*.

    I mean, that is gold standard right there, even placing that other chick in the same league as her is slightly sacrilegious.

    *pics or it didn't happen!

    • LuvinBale says:

      Yes! Thank You!!
      I totally agree- you can not put Shakira in the same league as these women- at least a gold medalist.
      She is a pop superstar, self made "rich bish" and she is all about the charities and causes. She has her own charity come to think of it and I thought she was also a UN Ambassador. Clearly she rises well above all of these ladies. PLUS- she owns her island. HER OWN ISLAND!!!
      I love her and if she did end up with Pique I think it would be awesome!!!

      • TuTu says:

        Agree!! She should be gold and be the only one there.

        Umm have you seen her IQ score? Its impressive to say atleast. Not to be mean but I'm pretty sure none of these girls can reach that.

    • Keziah says:

      Kickette I think you may have mistaken Shakira's PLATINUM medal for silver. Honestly not only is everything these other wonderful ladies noted correct (career, fame, fortune, charitable status, IQ etc) but also remember she sang the fricking anthem to the world cup… se was ON the field as a star in her own right and unlike Pastasauce didn't need to bring her own camera crew to get on EVERY broadcast… come on do the right thing and upgrade her!

    • Lissete says:

      Yes finally someone says it! People make it look like he's using her or she's his new woman but c'mon HE IS HER BOY TOY!! I've known who Shakira is for a looooong time. She is super well known to pretty much all latinos and once she started singing in english then she become well known to the world! If I even mention Gerard Pique's name no one even knows who I'm talking about! He may be super famous in Spain, but he doesn't even come close to her fame.

      This woman should be in a separate category altogether. Also it's still a rumor that they're even together! I agree, pics or it didn't happen!

    • @SweetNohemi says:

      Shakira does not deserve to be on this list! She is much more famous and powerful than all these women and some players!

    • nandosfreckles says:

      i agree with you , i mean shakira hit 1 BILLION views on youtube this week, i don't see any of these other wags achieving that.

    • @AgnesWonka says:

      c'mon! she isn't that good!

    • rainstarmcgee says:

      Completely agree!! i mean come on its SHAKIRA!

      she is a league of her own!

    • sodakiss says:

      Agree! I couldn't see why someone is on any higher rank than her! She should get a Platinum medal!!!!!

  50. LaraSergio&SaraIker says:

    Although im a Barca fan, I love Lara&Sergio and Sara&Iker. Both girls are gorgeous!!And their man as well :)

    I also like shakira, but with Pique??I mean, she's 10 years older!! She needs a MAN, not a 23 year old with beard. I mean I love Pique, he is tall, dark & handsome, but I see him so much more with a girl like his ex, Nuria. Bubbly girl in her early twenties. IF they are together (which i highly doubt), i dont think ist going to be a long-term relationship.

    I think he's heartbroken not madly in love- Look at this sad puppy face :( http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/gZl0iHzypV9/Barcel…

    • Thea says:

      Couldn't agree more re Pique – I think Shakira is just trying Cougar on for size….. we all know it's the in thing at the moment!

    • Linda says:

      I LOVE that picture! it's so funny to see him all snuggled up in that big coat, seems so comfy.
      He does seem a bit sad though… like he's in deep thoughts about what happened

    • @AgnesWonka says:

      I agree, i think he needs sb like Sara and Lara!

  51. MY TOP LA LIGA WAGS says:

    Nagore – what can I say about her…just look at the Vogue Espana…. + not to mention 2 kids…

    Malena Costa – since she been w/Puyi … I don't think she has missed a home game…plus I like the fact ..that one a reported asked… How do your part feel like (referring to the Ballon D'or) she didn't answer… If it was me I would have snapped… and said… I don't have a part… I'm was there supporting the man i love… or something like…

    Ana Ortiz – she is a designer(Andres put up a video on facebook… off her runway show..).. and I love how she can change hair color and length of hair… and still look amazing…

    Sara C . – I would have had her higher on my list … BUT … since her boob job… she has dropped in my rankings

    ———–

    Edurne – she meet David Dea Gea when the sang a song together for an album back in like November – December .. but I haven't heard them confrim it yet have they???

    Lara & Shakira — I like them…but since it hasn't been "OFFICIALLY" confrimed …not going to be on my list

    • Ana says:

      yes i agree with you my favorite two are indeed shakira an lara and their relationship respectevely has not been confirmed!! by the way shakira deserves an award of her own its skaira!! she's bigger than what the rest of the ladies put together will ever be!

    • Dru says:

      I'm not sure Sara even got the boob job, it's only tabloids saying she did…..if she did, it's got to be the world's first bust boost to make ZERO difference to the size/look of her chest.

      Malena seems pretty sincere and nice- I wasn't expecting to, but I like her. She and Puyi look pretty happy together, and as long as they are…

      • Kaya says:

        You are my friend, honestly. My better half and everything because I'm waiting for your reply to this, hahaha. I just hope you get to see this though, you speak my mind!

    • @AgnesWonka says:

      Nagore doesn't a job! that's why she's not on the Kickette's list.

  52. SoccerrLoverrr says:

    maaaaaaan i wanna be a WAG!

  53. Soon2beWifeOfNAsri says:

    seeing shakira's stomach makes me put down my chocolate bar and do a gazillion sit up, her body is out of this world. Her and pique would be an amazinnnnn couple

  54. they all look quite trashy IMO :|

  55. Leá says:

    Lara and Sergio kind of destroys me.

    I think you left out the Queen of the Spanish WAGS, Nagore.

  56. laz says:

    Love the medal system kickette. just 2 things:
    – where would legit actresses rank in here (ok, i don't think a footballer has ever dated a girl of legit acting caliber, such as in a position where they could get one of the respected awards, so never mind ;) )
    - where would girls with normal 9 to 5 and/or university educated jobs come on this list (from shop floor worker, to associate to doctor) as these types of girls have jobs too (though like the other option above, are there any girls whom footballers date whom have normal jobs/jobs that aren't done in front of a camera? It is a sad state of affairs if there aren't any – cookie for the 1st footballer whom dates this 'rare' type of girl ;D)

  57. nandosfreckles says:

    well i congratulate Shakira, I mean this is PIQUE we're talking about! he's like the synonym of perfection.
    he's 10 years younger than her and she still managed to bag him (if the rumours are true).
    WAY TO GO GIRL! i honestly admire her for that lol :)

    • Gill says:

      I agree. If it were true, it breaks the mold. A truly global superstar, super foxy cougar for oh so winsome (and rather elusive) Pique? Now that's tasty.

      The rest I'm finding a tad boring. Sergio and new girl moving in, Iker and Sara (yawn), Cris and Reena (aka Barbie and Ken). Yeah, this ain't much. The established and new face WAGs are probably more interesting, like Nagore, Malena et al.

    • Crackers says:

      Honestly, I think SHE is the bigger catch, Pique is the one who'd be getting congratulations from me! I mean, she's in the same league as Beyonce, Gaga etc- famous enough to be known by her first name alone, that's a superstar for you!

      But OMG, how tasty would the Piquira romance be if the rumour was true?

    • Lily says:

      Don't be silly, sweetie- maybe now is a good time for a reminder that jealousy-fueled nastiness isn't a good look on anyone, hmmm?

  58. Mary says:

    Christine Bleakley would be a better example of GMB (you did say likability was NOT a factor, right?), she's pretty well known as a presenter in the UK

  59. Amy says:

    hello? Nagore?! Nagore is the champ wag fo' sho'.

  60. Elisa says:

    Eh. Lacking the fabulousness (and by that I mean the over-the-top tackiness, but you can't help but love them quality) of the EPL WAGs. Pretty sure that Queen Alex could take any of these ladies with one sharp jab of her Louboutins, maybe with the exception of Shakira and her abs (although we're not even sure if she actually is a WAG, right?).

    • Crackers says:

      And it'd be funny to call her a WAG, I love Pique but she is definitely a bigger star than him!

      It'd be like calling (supermodel) Gisele Bundchen an NFL WAG when most people outside the US have no idea who Tom Brady is but would def. know Gisele's name.

    • @AgnesWonka says:

      Queen Alex? nope nope Queen Victoria! miss her and Sylvie in LaLiga…those are Wags!

  61. Sara P says:

    I still can not get over Lara and Sergio. I need more proof in order to believe that there is actually something going on between them.

    The caliber of La Liga WAGs is slightly boring. Is Sara Carbonero really the best that they can do?

    • Sara P says:

      I also think that Carles Puyol's new wag should be mentioned…..Malena.

      As well as Zaira who dates (or are they engaged) Diego Forlan. Or is she forfit because neither of them are from Spain? Guess I should go back up and re-read the rules huh? :)

      • Thea says:

        I must admit I find them dull – and Shakira and Pique I am NOT taking seriously. It's call the rebound fling, if it is indeed a fling at all!

        Kiss of death to do features on them – as we know with the English WAG's that's when the troubles start!

    • Crackers says:

      I think Zaira would qualify (they are engaged)…he does play for a Spanish club after all, and CR7 isn't Spanish either.

      I know, this lot do seem slightly tame. I guess we're just at a time when the La Liga boys have broken up with characters who might be a little better to make fun of (e.g. whatserface, though Irina seems to be lolworthy too)

  62. zztop says:

    alexis ruano plays for sevilla

  63. blake2108 says:

    WHAT?! David De Gea has a Girlfriend?
    Immediate dislike for Edurne…. Cradle snatcher…

    That's depressed me :(

    (btw Shakira Shakira is amazing <3 )