March 24th, 2011
Marco Borriello: Facebook Friending & Private Terrace Trespassing
Images: Facebook. Cheers Dielle!
Seems odd, but we don’t take much notice of footballers on Facebook. Heck, we’re seriously demotivated when it comes to updating our own Facebook page. Yes, you know the one. It’s covered in moths, chewing gum wrappers and someone clever has written “Wash Me” in the 2 inches of dust that’s settled on top of it.
However, we feel the time has come to make an exception. Our Finest Five number 1, AS Roma’s Marco Borriello, has sent his 5-o’clock shadow siren call across the broadband network. He’s on Facebook and we’re all over it like… blind rage and beards on DDR.
What’s Mr. B. been up to so far? Well, he’s shared new, computer screen crashing pics of his face and body in a ‘foto’ album that he probably named himself. No password or chastity belt keys required for access btw, Kickettes – he’s giving his goodies out for free.
We suggest you book a few hours at the spa to relax and mentally decompress before browsing Borri’s page. Once home and properly primped, immediately cancel all weekend plans and fluff your pillows. Comfort is critical when basking in the glory that is his welcome video.
Last but never least, give that wine delivery service you’ve got on speed dial a call and request one of their finest bottles of Chianti. You’ll need this as collateral to complete your masterful strategy of seducing that freaky IT chappie from your office.
Ya know – the one whose name you could never be arsed to remember even though he has a nasty habit of smearing his sweaty body, hairy belly down, across your desk while simultaneously reconfiguring your wonky cable connection at 6pm on a Friday before a bank holiday? He may not have had a shower in six days, and/or/definitely lives in his aunt Edna’s attic and sleeps with an action figure, but he may just be your best shot at hacking Marco’s FB page in order to successfully obtain his home address. Service delivery tip = totes worth it. That five or six minutes of “taking one for the team” will free us all.
Where were we?
Oh yes. In summary, social media is effing brilliant. Welcome to the internet, Marco!
What footballer Facebook pages are you ‘fans’ of, Kickettes? Do tell.