December 28th, 2011

Midweek Results: What’s On The Menu?

Favourite part of the festive feast? Hmm. Plump and juicy Welsh thigh? Image: Jamie McDonald/Getty Images.

Only the English are mad enough to carry on playing football during the festive break. We really shouldn’t cover the EPL results as it probably just encourages the FA to interfere with our quite spectacular hangovers, but even in the midst of these waking-up-in-the-morning-and-working-out-who-we-need-to-apologise-to times, we never forget you, the reader.

Arsenal 1-1 Wolverhampton Wanderers

But thanks to Arsenal’s own rear-end review, presented at Carrow Road last night, we’re now tinkering with the idea of a slice of prime rump. Yum. Image: AP Photo/Sang Tan.


Chelsea 1-1 Fulham

Oh, it’s so difficult though, isn’t it? Especially when you’ve spent the morning gorging yourself on cocktail sausages. Image: AFP PHOTO/GLYN KIRK.


Manchester United 5-0 Wigan Athletic

There might be the odd mimosa involved, of course. Triple strength, just the way Dimi likes it. Image: AP Photo/Jon Super.


West Brom 0-0 Manchester City

But remember not to over indulge. It can lead to unexpected results and disappointment the following day. Image: AP Photo/Tim Hales.


We should know.

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32 Responses to “Midweek Results: What’s On The Menu?”

  1. dalx6 says:

    I really love the limited words results posts, Keep up the good work!! :)

  2. cherryboomboomm says:

    What about Newcastle and hatem ben arfa ? :(

  3. Agnes Wonka says:

    EPL takes no holidays. We won't see La Liga till January.

  4. littlegreenpea says:

    Can we please work out a deal where chicharito AND berbatov are scoring at the same time?? It never seems to happen, but it would be awesome if it did. :)

  5. Jason Scott says:

    Bale was awesome, coming from a Norwich fan! Modric and Parker form the best centre midfield partnership in the league!

  6. Scoop says:

    Gareth Bale = Monkey Head.

  7. nayet21 says:

    Does Gareth know how amazingly cute and hot he is???
    I think he’s an excellent player too… And that picture is really nice. Thanks, Kickettes

  8. AiM says:

    my my, didn't realise Nando's Torres was that..err..tapered (at least from the angle the photo was taken) ;p

  9. Sergz says:

    Oh Berbatov. You sexy beast.

  10. casio resin says:

    Great job Bale. I like your way in making goal. you are one of the best. Maybe the best backfield player in premier league.

  11. blake2108 says:

    Gareth Bale needs to stop being so gorgeous and unavailable…

    • Gladys says:

      But doesn't he also seem like the type who doesn't even know it? (Which makes him all the more so.) :)

    • littlegreenpea says:

      If only I could stop drooling over his thighs… it's preventing me from accomplishing anything else…. And he's so tall and strong! What's not to like?

      • bri_saldana says:

        I haven't even bothered to join the topics of conversation…..the explicit images of what I could do to the grooves of his thighs are overwhelming! phew!

    • xoWinnie says:

      tell 'em Blake!

  12. Miss Lampard says:

    I hope in an happy new year for Chelsea because the last few matches were very awful. I'm very disappointed and I'm tired to hear the silly excuses from Andre Villas Boas; I'm not saying that it's all his fault, because he could be a great manager, and for sure he will be. But something doesn't work. I think that he has no experience in a big team like Chelsea that needs results in a very tiny time. From the top now there's a huge gap (11 points aren't a joke), and personally I haven't seen so many improvements since the start of the season, as Andre with a huge smile said. Actually I think that the main problem is that Andre is too young for the job (unfortunately age is not just a number as he said because if it had been true I would have trained Chelsea myself, or I would have been an history teacher without any graduation) and probably he isn't able to build up a relationship with all the components of the team. A manager should speak with his footballers also as a friend, as a man and shouldn't only treat them as footballer and only speak about tactics, human relationships are also very important. Another problem is Fernando Torres. The positive thing of this week is that he has finally played the full match, but unfortunately is not enough. Andre he has benched him for too many times, and a player, especially if he is a striker needs some matches to get the perfect shape, and more matches if we are speaking about Fernando Torres. Of course recently he has been only the shadow of himself, of what he was and I have always thought that his own problem was a problem of confidence, and I don't think, it doesn't appear, that Andre has worked in this sense.
    Really hope in a new better year for Chelsea and for everyone.

    • Sarah, Madrid says:

      I said it first when AVB first coached Chelesa, I will be interested to see how his relation will go with players as same age as his, with alex, Anleka, now Malouda, problems seem to be pailing up for him, one of a characteristic of a good coach is the one who is able to keep his players who get less time happy, his ability to make them feel important although he don't use them much, I think AVB is failing big time in this respect.
      Did he actually blame Torres for his miss or media made stuff up? I thought Torres played a very good game, he might miss a goal, but he created another, his off ball movement was great. Since he is a striker he will be judged for goals, I know that.

      Anyway I wish a happy new year, for your club to become better, AVB has a project I hope it works in the end of the day for you guys :)

      • April says:

        I think he made a comment about saying that generally we judge strikers by their goals and expect them to score, but that he and his staff do not judge a striker only by that. The press took and ran with the first part of the comment. He might have said he didnt think Fernando took his chance all that well, though (I have seen a couple different prints of that quote and am not certain what AVB actually said). But otherwise he said he did a good job. Frankly, I thought he did better than I imagined he would when I saw that Fulham were gonna mostly park the bus. It was a similar game to Wigan in that sense, and after that game not many thought Fernando could produce any better a result than Drogba… it's sort of anti-Torres style. So that said, he made do with it as he could and was one of the best in Chelsea Blue that night. There may be something to be said though for the comfort level of other guys on the team playing with him. I know he messes up some chances, but they seem reluctant to pass to him sometimes, and they just need to. They have to tough that out and let him mess up a bunch of times, even in one match, to recalibrate and get back into the swing of things. He had plenty of missed chances at his heyday in Liverpool, too.

        The midfield was pretty lackluster (DL did more to create chances than I think the midfield did combined or something like that), which was tough to see, and Cole got totally fooled my Ruiz for the goal.

        Not sure yet what I think about AVB's time thus far. I believe he has been dealt one of the toughest set of cards to manage as far as men go, but he knew that going in. I think it's too soon yet to say how he is really performing.. he went from managing a team that wanted to be stars to managing one that mostly thinks they are, but just because everyone has talent in the squad doesnt mean they can work together. AVB needs given some time to figure that part out and to make a squad that suits the style he wants to play, and one that buys in to what will be Chelsea's tenants during his tenure. I believe that could involve Torres, but as much as I love Nando, it may not. Lampard is a tough call, because he is really a legend for the team and can still perform, but I almost like him more in the Supersub capacity in recent times. I think we need an Alonso type at Chelsea… DL is as close as we currently have to that.. or Meireles, and that doesn't say a ton. Romeu could become that, but he needs to not have that weight on him just yet if we'd like him to grow into it. I think some people expect too much of him since he put in some good, early performances.

        Here's to hoping things look on the upside for Chelsea this year, but if not, I'm willing to see the season through for the necessary changes. All in all, it is up to the players, as much as the management, to make that happen. Step it up, boys!

        • Sarah, Madrid says:

          If Chelesa needs an Alonso type of a player, as much as it hurts me to say it, as much I love him, Granero is one excellent talent and midfielder that really is not getting enough time with us Real Madrid, who is totally wasted on the bench he is suppose to be player who replace Alonso, but with Nuri Sahin now in the squad, with players from our cantera who name is Alex doing so great, I think we have this position covered.
          I always thought that Granero would fit AVB style, I am surprised that he didn't think of him to include him in the squad, I don't think winter transfer Granero would leave because Mourinho don't like to sell anyone in the winter break, but if he contiunes to warm the bench, Granero could come available in the summer, Chelesa should consider him, I hope he stays, but his talent should be used somewhere else because I love him I don't him to be wasted although himself doesn't leave us, unless we start using him more often the next half of the season, Granero should leave and Chelesa could be perfect esp with Mata there too, they have a bromance, I wouldn't mind seeing it again too :P !

          • April says:

            Let the Spanish Inquisition of Chelsea continue! I like my EPL team to have a little Spanish running through their veins.

            So long as the Mata-Granero bromance wouldn't see Torres left out (he is all sensitive like that, haha… and without his Sergio to keep him warm…), it could be just what the doctor ordered. In the meantime, we'll see if Romeu and Meireles get to cover that role somewhat.

    • Gladys says:

      I was so hoping for Nando to do well on Monday and, as Sarah mentions, he played a good game, even though he didn't score (Fulham's GK made an amazing save…oh if only it had gone in). I agree that he has to keep playing to get his confidence back. AVB doesn't seem to be patient enough and that may be an issue that an older, more experienced manager would not have a problem with. Then, to make things worse, on the other end stands Chelsea's owner, who seems very impatient indeed when it comes to managers. It doesn't exactly make for a calm environment does it. I'm at least glad that Mata, Romeu, and Sturridge are doing well. But I will be sad to see some of the others go if that's what happens this winter.

    • Ioe says:

      Maybe it's just the fan in me, but I think that Nando will recover form if he is placed in the right environment to do so. I get the feeling AVB isn't doing enough to give him the support he needs? Yeah, I know he's not a child to be babied and coddled, but he is a £50-million asset and one of the best players of his generation, so maybe a little extra hand-holding and confidence-boosting wouldn't be so out of line? I agree, keep him playing until he remembers, and the crowd remembers, who he is and what he's capable of.

      If half the transfer rumors are true, it would seem that AVB and his boss are trying to buy themselves out of their goal shortage (goodbye Drogba, hello Pipita?), when they already have a lot of talent on their roster. Why not work with what they have, especially Torres who, with Mata, could be VERY inspiring, instead of shopping for more? We all know that, as much as we love it, retail therapy doesn't solve everything.

      • April says:

        Agreed on the asset part. That is what puzzles me most! I mean, they did realize when they bought Torres that he was a counter-attacking striker or best off a quick thru ball, no? I had figured that was what Abromovich wanted of Chelsea's future, but I get mixed reports on that.

        People seem to believe that Liverpool was built around Torres, but I don't think that was the case. Rafa's Liverpool was built around an idea and Torres was the last piece of that puzzle. Chelsea didnt seem to buy him with the same in mind, and I think that is cause for all this. They seem to think he should turn into something else… while it is possible for him to adapt, it is foolish to expect the Liverpool-style performance without the Liverpool-style of play. Others have said it, but I think if he were at Spurs or something like that, he'd be well back into form by now.

        • Ioe says:

          God, I wish the Spurs would make a budget for him, right? But since that doesn't seem likely right now (despite that rumor about Becks), the fan in me is just really hoping there's a way for him to work out at Chelsea. I get the feeling that with that price tag he's pretty much stuck there for a while (at least til end of this season, perhaps until the next season's winter transfer window?) and if things don't improve for him, that could result in permanent damage to his confidence and even, que horror, his form.

          Abramovich's vision for Chelsea has never really been clear to me, apart from the must-win-everything-now theme of course. If not for his revolving door of managers, I'd have thought his hiring of AVB was more brave than rash. Oh well… Maybe he was hoping to recreate Mou with his protegee? Abramovich's motives have been a mystery to me ever since he let Mou go.

          • April says:

            Abromovich is a puzzling man, for certain. But then, so is AVB to me at times. I don't really want to see Torres at Spurs, so much… but I do want him in the Premier League, so I'd be pleased if he were sold and could manage to stay in the league. Otherwise, I fear that his career will really fizzle out. I mean, rumors about Malaga could be true, but they aren't in CL or contenders at the moment, so I cannot see it being a prospect that he would care much for. And he doesn't seem to fancy the Italian league either. People think he wants back to Spain, but I don't. I think he just wishes things hadn't ended up they way they did at Liverpool or Chelsea, and if that is the case, I would agree.

    • mata says:

      The problem with AVB is not just youth, it's temperment and personality. He lacks the commanding presence of a Mourinho or Ferguson and that leads to a lack of belief and confidence in his players. He's much too thin-skinned, eg when he invites the players to express their opinions and then cold-shoulders anyone who disagrees with him. And he's so obsessed with his "philosophy" of how football should be played that he can't see the forest for the trees. You have to play with the team you've got not the team you want, and Chelsea is not Barcelona. Insisting on pressing high up the pitch with a high defensive line is not working, and it certainly does not bring out the best of players like Terry.

      And then there is Torres. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that player that the right manager couldn't sort out. If Chelsea are going to succeed this year then Torres has to be at his best, and to do that he has to be up front with Mata behind him, not stuck out wide. When Torres is up front, with Mata moving through the centre to supply him, they look great

    • Miss Lampard says:

      So girls I've found out something very interesting about the way to train of AVB and what Fernando Torres thinks about him. Sorry if the video is in spanish but there's also the link for translation somewhere. See at minutes 3:14…

  13. Alone- Brazil says:

    Arsenal once again did what he knows best! Lose points when you can not lose points!