February 28th, 2012

Motor Vehicle Off: Cristiano Ronaldo vs Mesut Özil

Ooh, batwings. But does it have any room for shopping bags? Images: Bellazon.com.

Our ‘Important Things To Remember About Cars’ file contains the following information:

  1. Don’t step in front of them when they’re moving,
  2. Don’t rest your hand on the door frame when someone’s just about to slam the door. Your manicurist will hate you.

Cristiano Ronaldo and Mesut Ozil, as well as their new(ish) vehicles, clearly have all the right curves. Our hormonal brakes, meanwhile, have never passed inspection.

Prone to unsuccessfully thinking on our pedicured toes, we knew these fantabulous photos of ‘ballers operating heavy machinery would require boy brains, so we borrowed a spare XY from the stationary cupboard without permission, showed him the evidence and politely demanded he get to our work. Immediately.

Cristiano Ronaldo – The Bull Baiter

This shiny hunk of manly matte black metal is a Lamborghini Aventador LP700-4 and according to sources, Crispy bought it with his birthday money. Our man-in-the-know tells us that it does 0-100kph in 2.9 seconds, which is great if you’re hungry and need to pick up a kebab late at night before last call.

The vehicle is described as a “bull taming 700 horses“, which basically means it’s incredibly powerful, manly and vaguely Freudian.


Mesut Özil – The Crowd Pleaser

Image: Marcamotor.com.

Mesut drives a more polished mode of transport which apparently has done him no favours. While Cristiano is able to cruise through the streets frightening old ladies with his stealth wheels, Mesut’s shiny Ferrari 458 cannot be left unattended for thirty seconds without attracting a flurry of parking fines.

On the plus side, this motor has received more awards than Jose Mourinho has received ‘improper conduct towards referees‘ citations. Always a plus.

Kickettes, which car do you prefer? Or, have you, like us, lost the will to comment on this one?

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39 Responses to “Motor Vehicle Off: Cristiano Ronaldo vs Mesut Özil”

  1. congsilo says:

    I love Cristiano Ronaldo vs Mesut Özil

  2. yepi 4 says:

    they are the stars, and the change of their car, I did not much surprise. I love them.

  3. Ford Fiesta says:

    You are in race two opponents by three spectacular races driving a Ford Fiesta, a complicated and fast race. Make sure that you will place first at the end of this race car!

  4. visit my says:

    amazing car

  5. BASITH says:


  6. Rosie says:

    I'll give them both the benefit of the doubt–maybe they truly appreciate the cars they got and go to a racing car on weekends where they can drive fast. Otherwise if they bought these cars to show off or to go shopping, they are fools.
    Me, i only care about the color of the leather seats inside (anything but boring beige or grey) but frankly i cant wait for cars that drive themselves. I like those vespas too or whatever they are. Mesut wins on outfit and ability to get in/out of his vehicle sans assistance.

  7. Ornella says:

    be careful ronaldo! it's beautiful <3

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  9. KL7 says:

    I'm quite sure I could make myself comfortable with either man in either car! However, I think the matte finish on CR's lambo is hot. Besides, CR has a ferrari at home in the garage and many other shiny little toys. Wish he'd invite me over to play….

  10. sarah says:

    crispyyys car ..cause im hoping oneday we will do it in the backseat of that exact same car *.*

  11. DrStrangelove says:

    Looks like Crissy has real 'lie back and enjoy yourself' seats.

    Vrroom, vroooooooom!

  12. Emmy says:

    Haha, I prefer Ferrari, but still Pique's dirty car is my biggest love <3 :D hahah

  13. Loninha - Brasil says:

    I love Ronaldo and Mesut all beautiful and cute ones!
    With a car that I resolvria all my financial problems I even travel to Germany! wow! They are very expensive cars and beautiful!

  14. MissyV says:

    Lambo doors are just ridiculous! How on earth are you gonna get in and out of the car without ripping your dress? Haha!! But seriously though, I’m not a big fan of flashy cars, and in this case, I think Ozil’s car is waaybetter than Cris’.

  15. Maris says:

    I know my husband will skin me alive, but I have never seen an uglier car than a lamborghini (okay, the bugatti veyron is a close call). I would prefer the ferrari if I must choose… why you want to drive a car with a trillion hp anyway when you go SHOPPING in the city center? sorry…

    • Leya_S says:

      Oh no, how could you say the Veyron is ugly?! I mean, its definitely no DB9 or Quattroporte, but ugly is a bit strong, imho.

      Now the Porsche Panamera in white….that's pretty bad, I would say…

      • Mrs. Q.Borri says:

        IMO the Panamera is so cute and specially in white I've seen it and is so gorgeous!!
        So classy!! :)

  16. Ninanoir says:

    Quick! Into the batmobile!

  17. Catie2838 says:

    Cris looks so awkward trying to crawl into his squished version of the bat mobile. Mesut wins by a mile on that part alone. Normal doors are the norm for a reason.

  18. Natalie says:

    Both Freudian. And another thing, didn't real madrid player received Audi cars to drive???

    • DebS says:

      Yes they did. I suspect that these may be their "fun" car and the car they have to drive to work, etc. is the Audi. Don't know for sure but I would think Audi may have something to say about it if they are only driving these cars.

  19. black widow says:

    i think arbeloa drives a mini cooper. that, to me, is hotter than either of these two cars.

  20. Mrs. Q.Borri says:

    MO way better, Cris cars just looks to much! I mean that car is for Sundays is not an everyday car… While Mesut's looks more suttle in a way. Is flashy but just enough to wanna look at it, so that's why I like it. Btw Mesut is so looking FINEEE.!! Yesterday pic, Oh my!!

  21. Agnes Wonka says:

    Wow! those cars are amazing! Thou Lamborghinis tend to look rather futuristic to me, I like what CR drives.
    Both cars are cool.
    I could take them on a ride on my Toyota any time!

  22. Leya_S says:

    Love a Ferrari, but the new Lambo line (Aventador vs. the old Mercielago) is sooooooooo nice.
    …although Ozil is still my fave.

  23. Jayy says:

    Id take a ride with both anyday but Mesut might get the edge over Cris cos those Lamborghini doors on Cris' car looks too fiddly. Id practically be doing the limbo to get out of there.

  24. Kristina says:

    Cars leave me stone cold I'm afraid. If it's not an Aston Martin. But Özil on a bicycle would a cute sight.

  25. bayrak says:

    Mesut OZIL is a fantastic footbal player. I congrulate him for his success.

  26. Anon says:

    Both those cars are ridiculously impractical if one is wearing a dress/skirt!

  27. Gladys says:

    I'd take sweet-faced Ozil in a broken down Ford Fiesta (I think he might oddly pass the McDonald's test for me– it's those sunken eyes!) over Cris. But owner aside, that glossy ride is also pretty sweet.

  28. Danielle says:

    I don't have much interest in cars, but I prefer Mesut's because his doesn't have ridiculous doors. And bless MO and his sideways cap, he is so cuddly.

  29. TFBlovesArsenal says:

    Ozil's car is so sleek, whereas Ronaldo's looks like he's trying to compensate for something…or it could just be that I have never cared for Lamborghini. Whatever it is, I like Bambi's car better!

  30. Melaniee. says:

    I like shiny…..

  31. Sarah, Madrd says:

    Me cars yeah right!! All I know I want take a ride with Bambi or Cris if that is possible