March 4th, 2010
National Team Choices: Yes, No, Maybe So?
The premise of this Sizzle Query is simple, dear readers. Three National team footy players. All offering champagne, grapes and an overnight cuddle sesh. You must divvy out your responses as follows:
1. Submit willingly to one by saying “yes”;
2. Rubber stamp a big ‘ole REJECTED sign on on another, signifying “no”;
3. Ask for a raincheck by regrettably informing them “maybe so/not now but absolutely later babe, pinky swear!”
(Let us pre-empt the inevitable – you’re not allowed to vote “I throw a rope around the trio and group-run like hell to the nearest shower.”)
Just to throw another wrench your way, we didn’t necessarily select the most obvious choices of man candy. To play fairly, we decided to give some of the other NT members the spotlight for a change. “Some” being the operative word.
That being said, hypothetical circumstances are irrelevant. You must choose and there’s no other way about it. Keep in mind that while we’ve included our own thoughts, You.Must.Choose. Since we are co-conspirators of the original version of this game, we just supercede the rules.
This should be good.
Portugal: Duda, Raul Miereles. Paolo Ferreira
We say: Duda/HELL YEAH; Raul/Not with that beard; Paolo/Give us a cheeky pinch and we’ll consider
Ivory Coast: N-Dri Koffi Romaric, Souleman Bamba, Abdoulaye Meite
We say: N-Dri/Yes; Souleman/No because his scowl needs work; Abdoulaye/We’re still debating on what’s causing him so much confusion
Brazil: Maicon, Robinho, Kaka
We say: Maicon/Yes, we’ve been missing out; Robinho/Obvious No; Kaka/MS?
Spain: Gerard Pique, David Villa and Xabi Alonso
We say: DNA is soo not fair
Steven Gerrard: absolutely, extremely, deadly, surely YES!!!!!!!!!!! he the best captain ever!!!! Love you captain fantastic!!!!!
Green: Maybe
Terry: not in a million year
ENGLAND:
Terry – YES
Green – NO
Gerrard – MAYBE
PORTUGAL:
Duda – NO
Miereles – MAYBE
Ferreira – YES
IVORY COAST:
Bamba – YES
Romaric – NO
Meite – MAYBE
BRAZIL:
Kaka – YES
Maicon – NO
Robinho – MAYBE
SPAIN:
Alonso – YES
Villa – MAYBE
Pique – NO
Ok i’m sorry JT all day long, please forgive me but if nando’s available yes please ; )
Wow, I can't believe the amount of NOs Xabi has received. I'm so astonished that I can't even answer this competition properly. Seriously, girls, NO TO XABI ALONSO? UNTHINKABLE! UNHEARD OF!
Um, so.. yes to Gerrard and Alonso only. XD
I agree, out of all the footballers on this page Xabi Alonso is the sexiest, best looking one.
England
Gerrard: Yes
Green: maybe
Terry: no!
Spain
Piqué: maybe
Villa: Hell Yeah!
Xavi: no
England:-
Gerrard- No
Green-Maybe
Terry- oh yes
Portugal:-
Duda- No
Raul Miereles- Yes
Paolo Ferreira- maybe
Ivory Coast:-
N-Dri Koffi Romaric-maybe
Souleman Bamba-no
Abdoulaye Meite-yes, just because i like to keep my men confused. he's already off to a good start
Brazil:-
Maicon-YES! hotness
Robinho-no
Kaka- maybe, he might have to change his name first though. still hard to get past that. But wouldn't mind making myself a Maicon, Kaka sandwich
Spain:-
Pique- maybe
Villa- yes
Xabi- no
where's italy???
ICK! NO thank you to ALL of these!
Whaaaaaaaa!
Are. You. Serious.
Meh suit yourself, all the more for me
Yuck! Terry probably has some serious STD's after having sex with all those hoes!
Stevie: Of Curse YES!!!!!
Green: mmm No
Terry: Maybe… ijijij
I love how Kaka got so many ‘Yes! Yes! Yes!’s Made me very happy. He gets all my nods too….
But then I think of how saintly and un-single he is. So I wish there was Nando, but then I remember…. so finally I wish for Yoann. There could have been better choices.
England:-
Gerrard- YES!!!!!
Green-No
Terry- I wouldn;t say no…so maybe
Portugal:-
Duda- Maybe
Raul Miereles- Yes
Paolo Ferreira-No…he looks dead =|
Ivory Coast:-
N-Dri Koffi Romaric-Yes
Souleman Bamba-Maybe
Abdoulaye Meite-No
Brazil:-
Maicon-No
Robinho-Maybe
Kaka-YES!
Spain:-
Pique- YES! YES! YES!
Villa- He’ll have to be a maybe
Xabi will have to be no
Should really have Holland and France too
Oh Kickette, how kind of you to dangle the dream of Stevie in front of my lustful eyes. So a yes, yes, y-eees to Stevie (I’m in When Harry met Sally mode there) and I wouldn’t turn down Xabi if he pitched up on the doorstep with a bottle of champagne and a cheeky grin. The others? meh. Some distinctly skanky. Terry? – eurgh – unclean…
I can't pick between spain so I would take Pique, Villa, and Xabi. And then only Kaka from Brazil and maybe Stevie from England. For Portugal Cristiano should have been in there.
ENGLAND:
Stevie: No
Green: Yes
Terry: Maybe
PORTUGAL:
Duda: Maybe
Raul Miereles: Yes
Paolo Ferreira: No
IVORY COAST:
N-Dri Koffi Romaric: YES
Souleman Bamba: Maybe
Abdoulaye Meite: No
BRAZIL:
Maicon: No
Robinho: Maybe
Kaka: YES
SPAIN:
Crap, why didn't Spain post?
SPAIN:
Pique: No. He looks like my brother.
Villa: Maybe
Xabi: YES
ENGLAND:
Terry – NO
Green – MAYBE
Gerrard – YES, YES, YES!!
PORTUGAL:
Duda – YES
Miereles – NO
Ferreira – MAYBE
IVORY COAST:
Bamba – YES
Romaric – NO
Meite – MAYBE
BRAZIL:
Kaka – YES
Maicon – MAYBE
Robinho – NO
SPAIN:
Alonso – NO
Villa – YES
Pique – MAYBE
Can I have Gerard and Villa together???? No? Worth a try! *sad face*
mmmm… where's france? and italy? what about gourcuff and c.ron? ahhhhkkkk!
ENGLAND
Stevie G – maybe. wrinkles can be contagious, you know.
JT – a big fat guilty YES.
Green – nah.
PORTUGAL
Duda – Yes — and only because you did not include Deco in the line up.
Miereles – No
Ferreira – Maybe… if we turn up the sizzle a notch.
IVORY COAST
Romaric – No
Bamba – Yes
Meite – Maybe
BRAZIL
Maicon – ahhh.. so so. he will do.
Robinho – No
Kaka – Jesus, YES! I'll butter him up like a slice of wonderbread.
SPAIN (I'm telling you, it's a shame to throw such sweet booty away!)
Pique – No
Villa – Maybe
Alonso – A big resounding YES! Gimme some more of that ginger scruff!
SPAIN: Pique: I would bang d@ like a loose screen door in a hurricane!! Xabi: Nope, not after the gingerbeard saga. Villa: Perhaps, just 2 work my way back 2 Pique!!
I choose 2 not peruse n judge the otha teams, since I have decided 2 b a 1-man perve.
England
Stevie: HECKYES!
Green: Maybe..
Terry: Before the scandal, I would’ve said maybe/yes.. now NO!
Portugal (all rather ugly though…)
Duda: I so would!
Raul: Nah..
Paulo: Maybs..
Ivory Coast (all rather ugly too)..
N-Dri: Yeh
Souleman: Sure?
Abdoulaye: Naah.
Brazil
Maicon: Possibly.
Robinho: NO!
Kaka: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Spain (MMMMMM CAN I HAVE ALL OF THEM!?
)
Pique – YES!
Villa – MAYBEEE.
Alonso – YES.
But, can I have Pique, Alonso and Gerrard, pleease
<3
England- Steven Gerrard (There wasnt even any competition)
John Terry- Maybe
Robert Green- No
Portugal
Raul- Yeah baby!
Paolo- Later
Duda- Nope
Ivory Coast
N-Dri Koffi Romaric- But of course
Souleman Bamba- Raincheck please
Abdoulaye Meite- Never
Brazil- Kaka deffo!
Maicon- Your next!
Robinho- Hell no!
Spain- So so hard, but I’d have to go with David Villa. Good things come in small soulpatch wearing packages.
Alonso- Nooo
Pique- I'd think about it
I vote -
SPAIN
David Villa – HELL YES! I’ll be there like NOW
Sorry to the missus 
Gerard Pique – Sorry but no. Notice I’m forced to say no given the strict rules of this game
Xabi Alonso – Maybe Baby. Wait, make that YES after Villa
<3
ENGLAND:
Gerrard-YES I guess
Green-MAYBE
Terry-NO! ick, even before all the crap
PORTUGAL (where is DECO??!):
Duda-MAYBE
Meireles-NO, don’t like facial hair
Ferreira-HELL YES!! That pic does him NO justice
IVORY COAST:
Romaric-NO
Bamba-YES
Meite-MAYBE
BRAZIL:
Maicon-MAYBE
Robinho-NO
Kaka-YES! YES!!
SPAIN:
Pique-NO
Villa-MAYBE
Alonso-YES
ENGLAND:
Gerrard: YES
Green: maaaaybe
Terry: When hell freezes over.
PORTUGAL:
None of the above? What’s up with this selection?
IVORY COAST:
Romaric: raincheck?
Bamba: yes.
Meite: nope.
BRASIL:
Maicon: maybe baby
Robino: just don’t make the cut, sorry hun.
Kaka: YES. YES. Once more, YES.
SPAIN:
All of the above. Why are Fernando and Sergio not in this list? Hmph.
next time, can we have shirtless pics of all the choices?
Just Gerrard out of all of them thank you. He has enough testosterone for a hundred guys. And I wouldn’t JT for any reason.
I'm gonna say Pique but just cause he's the only single one. The rest of the men are married and with kids(Villa, Alonso, Kaka, Gerrard, Maicon…) and I'm immediately turned off by married men.
Thanks for the reminder Lillie
So great disclaimer, my choices are purely in jest and under the fantasy that this is not real life BUT if this is (which is as impossible as Earth colliding with Pluto in the next 5sec), I’ll also pick the single one.
Self deprivation is shit but I’m more fearful of karma
Hehehe, and besides, the single one has the most gorgeous blue eyes of all of them!
And I agree with you about the karma thing.
How dare you even put Terry there as an option. I'm really beginning to think that the Kickette writers are men, instead of women.
ENGLAND:
Terry – No
Green – Maybe
Gerrard – Yes (except…not really)
PORTUGAL:
Duda – Yes
Miereles – No
Ferreira – Maybe
IVORY COAST:
Bamba – Maybe
Romaric – Yes
Meite – No
BRAZIL:
Kaka – Yes
Maicon – Maybe
Robinho – No
SPAIN:
Alonso – Yes
Villa – Maybe
Pique – No
(Cesc or Fernando – YES PLEASE)
You’re right, DNA is no fair…
and WHERE IS FRANCE??? Yoann – yes. very much yes.
gerrard – hell yeah !!!drop dead gorgeous and should be captain in the first place
xabi alonso – maybe if he came back to liverpool where he should be
xx
England-
Gerrard: yes
Green: maybe
Terry: no
Portugal-
Duda: maybe… i guess…
Raul Miereles: Yes
Paolo Ferreira: no
Spain- (since i can’t say yes to then all- so cruel…)
Pique: Hell yes!
Villa: Sadly, i’ll say maybe… cuz i have to…
Xabi: (why will u make me say it!) no….
England:
gerrard: no, too cute aaand i’d be thinking about lilly ella and lexie the whole time
green: hell no
jt: yes, if it means we can gossip all night about his affairs and about frankie.
speaking of which, where is frankie???
Portugal:
duda: noooo
meireles (you spelled his name wrong): hell yeah, tattooed and gorgeous, nevermind the beard
paolo: no, he’s the kind of guy that resembles to your dad or something
where’s cris???
Ivory Coast:
no, no and no. where’s drogba??? it’s a f*****g disgrace he ain’t here!
Brazil:
maicon: no, sooo not my type
robinho: too much of an idiot to consider even talking to him
kaka: too cute, know his wife, know luca, couldn’t do it…
Spain: ahem, tough one
pique: i’ll have to pass, my bff is toootally in love with him, wouldn’t wanna cause torment in our relationship
villa: ok.
xabi: ok if he speaks english all night with his lovely spanish accent.
where’s the ramos???
lol! no drogba is a definate f*****g disgrace. good point out and call
I honestly only want to answer for Spain, and I’m gonna stick up for Gerard. Big fat yes to Pique. Perhaps to Villa. And no to Alonso – I know, shocker.
Times are hard……..yes to all the above lol
Maybe not JT
Stevie – Yes, if just for the accent
Green – Maybe. I like keepers generally.
Terry – NEVER
Duda – No
Raul Miereles – Yes
Paolo Ferreira – Maybe
N-Dri Koffi Romaric – No
Souleman Bamba – Yes
Abdoulaye Meite – Maybe
Maicon – Yes
Robinho – No
Kaka – Maybe
Gerard Pique – Absolutely not. I agree with bam, I don’t see what people find attractive about him.
David Villa – Maybe. If it involved shaving the soul patch.
Xabi Alonso – YES. A THOUSAND TIMES YES.
i'm at a loss for words. you are suggesting the unthinkable. shaving THE soul patch. shudders. how do you sleep at night
Sorry, I don't like twee facial hair. If you want it, be a man and grow a beard (love Xabi's, tolerate Iker's).
No Irishmen?
Et tu, Kickette?
Spain: Fabregas, Torres, NAVAS!!(have you ever seen eyes like those!!)
England: Gerrard, Terry, Lampsy
i <3 jesus's eyes. beautiful, beautiful, beautiful!!
jesus has the most beautiful eyes i've ever seen <3
♥
you have good taste in spaniards
Yes! Who are your fav’rite spaniards?
Depending on what way we are playing this i would say;
Portugal – yes to raul, no to duda, maybe to paolo
Ivory Coast – yes to abdoulaye, no to N-Dri, maybe to Souleman
Brazil – yes to kaka, no to robinho, maybe to maicon
Spain – yes to Gerard, no to david, maybe to xabi
OR
!!
yes to spain, no to portugal and maybe to brazil
Yes to Spain
No to England, Brazil
Maybe to IC, Portugal
IC?
im guessing ivory coast
I was so overcome by the Spaniards that I didn’t really pay attention to anyone else. Sheesh. Thanx.
Duda, Raul Miereles. Paolo Ferreira – no to everyone not named cris or deco
N-Dri Koffi Romaric- he has a sad, yes i’ll make it better Souleman Bamba – looks constipated, no Abdoulaye Meite – yes, too cute
Maicon-maybe Robinho-oh hell no Kaka-yes, please
Gerard Pique, David Villa and Xabi Alonso – it is against the law in all countries to reject anyone on the spainish nt.
ok, maybe i suck at reading comp
yes, yes, hell yes to espana
no to england (really girls, what's up with them)
maybe later america
Spain: Where is our captain?
England: Hello 'Captains'
Portugal: Dunno….and ditto with Spain
Brazil: Ricardo Kaka save the day
Ivory: Jersey helps (a lot!!!)
England- Steven Gerrard (There wasnt even any competition)
Portugal- Raul
Ivory Coast- N-Dri Koffi Romaric
Brazil- Kaka deffo!
Spain- So so hard, but I'd have to go with David Villa. Good things come in small soulpatch wearing packages.
JOHN TERRY- HELL YES!!!! <3 god i love him… dont mind what hes doing in private life.
So many choices:
England
Stevie–Oh Captain, MY Captain!!!!
Green–maybe
Terry–No thanks
Spain
Pique–hard to say, but no
Villa-maybe
Xabi—-HELL YEAH
No to Gerrard and Terry (ewww, that's not even sloppy seconds, more like sloppy hundreds) Green only if I was totally drunk.
No to the Portugal Boys. CRon only, okay maybe Deco.
Ivory Coast: Yeah, probably.
Brazil: Only Kaka. I would take Robinho to the park, children love the park.
Spain: Yes please! Xabi's gonna have to lose the beard though.
just Spain, really:
Pique: hell,yeah!I'll take him beard or no beard, for better or for worse, in sexiness and in hottness.
Villa:maybe.
Alonso:no,hun, cuz I'm already dreaming about ur brother!
ENGLAND:
Terry – No
Green – Maybe
Gerrard – Yes
PORTUGAL:
Duda – YES
Miereles – NO
Ferreira – MAYBE
IVORY COAST:
Bamba – YES
Romaric – NO
Meite – MAYBE
BRAZIL:
Kaka – YESSSS
Maicon – Maybe
Robinho – Hell NO
SPAIN:
Alonso – Maybe No
Villa – Yes
Pique – MAYBE
Spain. Definitely.
but I have to chose
Alonso – YES
Villa – maybe
Pique – can I say maybe again? No? then NO
ENGLAND:
Terry – YES
Green – NO
Gerrard – MAYBE
PORTUGAL:
Duda – YES
Miereles – NO
Ferreira – MAYBE
IVORY COAST:
Bamba – YES
Romaric – NO
Meite – MAYBE
BRAZIL:
Kaka – YES
Maicon – NO
Robinho – MAYBE
SPAIN:
Alonso – HELL YES
Villa – NO
Pique – MAYBE
Kickettes, please know – we would have included the Itals and the Irish had our photo stealing fairies been able to find matching photos like the others. Yes, that's right: we excluded hot nations simply because of a) laziness b) more laziness.
We'll make it up to you. Promise.
Spain – Take me now Xabier Alonso. I am yours, body and soul.
England – Stevie <3
And…no one else.
I'm not following the rules but I don't care.
Duda – Raincheck
Raul Miereles – Hell yes, beard & all!
Paolo Ferreira – No, sweet looking guy but no.
N-Dri Koffi Romaric – the name alone almost wins me over but he's a raincheck for me
Souleman Bamba – yep
Abdoulaye Meite – nope
Maicon – not for me
Robinho – maybe, raincheck for now
Kaka – yes, all the way, any time, any place, yes!
Gerard Pique – Just no. Don't get why people love him so much, hate the beard on him, hate his hair even more & think he's got a slightly odd mouth/lips. Don't get it at all.
David Villa – mmmm yes.
Xabi Alonso – raincheck for me…I think I actually prefer him with the beard…
Oh and I’m greatly saddened by the lack of any Italians on offer.
pique’s mouth is my second fav attribute that he has! lol
Will gladly and most willingly take any and all members of La Roja. England is hit or miss, for obvious reasons of sleaziness. I realize that I am not exactly playing by the rules, but that is my right as a warm blooded female.
I am playing by your rules… One Team, One choice