March 22nd, 2012
Olivier Giroud & Benjamin Corgnet: England’s Most Wanted?
Olivier Giroud contemplates the prospect of snogging Bacary Sagna. Image: FRANCK FIFE/AFP/Getty Images.
With Sir Alex Ferguson and Roberto Mancini vigorously ploughing the Eden Hazard furrow and Harry Redknapp (or REDBAPPS as our cellphone autocorrect amusingly insists) flirting with Loic Remy, Ligue 1 is clearly going to be a heavy contributor to the EPL cause this summer.
And no British invasion of French soil would be complete without plunderer-in-chief Arsene Wenger, who is rumoured to be jones-ing for the services of Dijon midfielder Benjamin Corgnet and Montpellier’s Olivier Giroud.
Well, the potential for geekery is there… Image: JEFF PACHOUD/AFP/Getty Images.
As is usual in footie punditry, commentators are concerning themselves with questions like “will Corgnet be a worthy addition to Arsenal midfield alongside Tomas Rosicky?” and speculation about Giroud’s prospective role – “will he be more than cover for RvP?” – keeps the truly important issues at bay.
Is Corgnet adorkable enough for Arsenal? How are his angry bird impersonations? Are Giroud and wifey Jennifer capable of producing bubbas as cute as Shaqueel? Will he kiss Bacary Sagna will the same passion as he did Mathieu Debuchy?
Get on it, Kickettes. You are clearly the only people qualified to address these crucial details.