March 29th, 2007
We’ve got some more deets about what guests can expect at Coleen McLoughlin 21st birthday bash.
Think circus. And not in a good, “media circus” kinda way.
There will be a large marquee set up with a fairground, a semi-circular bar made of ice and an electric curtain (silver, natch), that will open up to reveal contortionists with giant feathers, acrobats and Peter Crouch in drag.
Just kidding about that last part. We hope.
Wayne Rooney will be the “ringmaster”, whatever the hell that means. Might have something to do with the rumour he’s going to give Coleen a
March 29th, 2007
It’s a slow news day and everyone is either annoying us or is very unattractive.
We’ve always been believers in the Deny To Infinity methodology for infidelity, meaning: if you get caught, deny until the day you die. Deny to the point of actually believing your own denial, thus making it much more authentic. However, there are certain cases where our strategy may not be successful.
Arsenal midfielder Tomas Rosicky has been cold busted partying with half a dozen prostitutes by his girlfriend, Czech model Radka Kocurova. Apparently she has seen photographic evidence of this over-populated incident.
We would tell you more about this story, but as we said above: unattractive/annoying. If you want to see what Tomas looks like, Google him, cuz we sure as hell aren’t gonna do it.
Link: Rosicky Girl Hooker Party Rage
March 27th, 2007
On a balcony. In his drawers. ‘Nuff said.
March 27th, 2007
Anyone want to predict the level of hangover for these two this morning?
We’re thinking it might be a code red situation. Or, in other words, a driving the porcelain bus situation.
The Beckhams got their groove on last night with P Diddy, first having dinner at London’s Nobu and then heading to the Automat bar. Reports say David was looking down and not terribly happy – this is the second night in a row we’re hearing about David’s temperate mood.
We won’t speculate if his attitude has anything to do with us refusing to take his calls anymore. David. You’re married. We can’t be together. Not at least until you send more money. Or a nice necklace. We’re not bothered.
But back to our story of alcohol and Diddyness. Thinking they could keep up with Puff Daddy was their first mistake. This is a man who bathes in champagne and wears diamonds the size of croutons in his ears.
Even with the British-born birthright of being able to drink the bar dry, David and Victoria couldn’t handle it. They stumbled out into their waiting car, with the Daily Mail reporting Victoria looking “tired and emotional” as she collapsed in a heap over David. We’ve seen Victoria this hammered before, but it’s a rare pleasure to see the couple completely smashed together.
The second mistake? The Burberry tea cozy hat.
The third mistake? (Yes, this was an evening of many) Victoria’s non-bra. Girl you’re wearing jersey fabric. Seriously. Put on a goddamn bra. No one wants to have a conversation with you when those things are doing all the talking.
March 26th, 2007
David and Victoria Beckham were out in London last night chowing down at Scotts in Mayfair. They were having dinner with their friend and celebrity chef bigmouth-curse-alot Gordon Ramsey.
The bare bones of this non-newsworthy situ?
- Victoria wore Christopher Kane and looked like a trollop. (Mr. Kane sent her his entire Spring/Summer 07 collection).
- David looked mighty fine with a good pair of shoes
- David, whilst looking mighty fine and wearing good footwear, got annoyed with Victoria and her posing for the paparazzi, was a little huffy, but kept his mouth shut, and eventually they entered the restaurant.
Link: Posh’s Fashion Errors, Sky News