October 16th, 2006

Meet Mrs B: London

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For those of you in the UK, Vicky B will be at Selfridges on 30 October to sign copies of her new book, That Extra Half An Inch.

You can see her up close, in the flesh. She might even let you touch one of her diamonds.

Oh, please, who are we kidding.

It’s sure to be an event full of WAG wannabes, teeny boppers and nosey shoppers; you can count on Victoria to pout for the camera until the last dregs of the autograph seekers have left the building.

October 16th, 2006

ronaldo watch: the man bag

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This photo of Mr. Ronaldo offers much fashion food for thought.

The man bag.

The lizard belt.

The jeans that seem just a little too tight, even for our liking.

The man bag.

Wait, we already said that.

Cristiano, honey, we know you’re a buff piece of Eurotrash, but you need to fix up.  We can help.  Call us.  We’re on the speed dial, under “F” for “fashion crimes against hotties”.

October 16th, 2006

Send in the Accountants: Roman Abramovich

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Oh, Lord help he who scorns a footy wife.

May he be doomed to a life of squalid dwellings consisting of only 6 bedrooms, and forced to pay his ex-wife monthly expenses that could sustain the economy of several third world countries.

Soccer gazillionaire and non-hottie Roman Abramovich looks to be facing the biggest divorce settlement in history when his wife Irina finishes taking his jet-setting so-rich-it-hurts-our-brain, ass to the cleaners.

A week ago, reports started surfacing in the tabloids about Rom’s extramartial gallavanting. His inability to secure a gag order with the press has resulted in all the dirty Gucci linen being hung out to dry. Wife Irina is Pissed.

And for good reason – she’s had five of this dude’s kids, suffered through God knows how many dinner conversations where Rom tries to explain the offside rule, and now he’s running her previously unknown name through the mud? He must be punished.

We’re talking about mountains of cash, yachts, mansions, cars. One of his boats is bulletproof and has its own submarine. He has a

October 12th, 2006

Thursday Talent: Alessandro del Piero

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Whenever you need a pick me up, we recommend a leisurely click-surf through Mr. Del Piero’s website.

If we knew how to say tastey-delight in Italian, we would christen him as such. But we’re uni-lingual and proud, so we’ll stick with “he’s hot”.

Link: Alessandro Del Piero, Official Site

October 11th, 2006

WTF files: england v croatia

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… we’re not even going to talk about it.

Because our throats are hoarse from booing.

If, dear readers, you’re feeling some discomfort over the Paul Robinson/Gary Neville own goal fiasco, or the Steve McClaren craptastically crappy game plan, think of it this way: it’s nature’s way of proving, once again, that unattractive people can’t be trusted.

See you Thursday eve, we’re off to eat bon bons and cuddle up to our David Beckham posters.