November 28th, 2011

People We’re Not Afraid To Envy: Eva Carneiro, Chelsea FC

Image: Mike Hewitt/Getty Images Europe.

There are two kinds of women who like football. There are the ones who sit about on their backsides all day leching at players and arguing over who broke the communal nail file, and the ones who do something constructive with it.

Being the ones who have got the former completely and utterly covered, we have time to turn our attention to the other kind. That lady sitting on the bench next to Salomon Kalou is Eva Carneiro, and she is the reserve team doctor for Chelsea FC. She has made the occasional appearance for Chelsea before, but clearly we were too busy um… working to notice.

Why should you care? Well, put it this way, boys n’ girls. Our lifestyle choices leave us many a happy hour to fantasising about rubbing Fernando Torres’ thighs. Her lifestyle choices have enabled her to actually do it.

And that’s why you should go to school, kids.

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39 Responses to “People We’re Not Afraid To Envy: Eva Carneiro, Chelsea FC”

  1. lillie says:

    I would really love to her job one day- be interesting to see what course she took to get where she is today

  2. Marina_Isabella says:

    Why is that I'm not really attracted to ginger-ish or blond men, but when I see a Spanish/Portuguese/Italian blond/ginger specimen and they start talking n' stuff, I just can't help but to find them attractive?… What is that? I don't know… but I like it…! This guy and Xabi Alonso are: jfkldkjflkajfldskjflkdjglk, yess!

  3. littlegreenpea says:

    all the more reason to study as a physio… so you can work at top football clubs and get free tickets to the games… sounds like a great job, rubbing down footballers every day.
    ps. avb is a sexy ginger and I am not ashamed of saying it…

  4. littlegreenpea says:

    And I'll bet your life revolves around women… I see no difference.

  5. Mrs. Q.Borri says:

    Bring back the thumbs down button. Period!! ASAP!

    Btw: Eva, You go girl!!! :)

  6. earidurt says:

    forget the chelsea boys, andre is the one i'd like to rub down! o-m-g! i dunno what he is doing in that pic but he makes it look so hot.

  7. Rania says:

    this is exactly why i want to become a physician…ahh the pleasure of being around footballers and near the pitch :D

  8. IrishBlue says:

    Ok, I'm a nurse, surely this in some way should qualify me for some sort of job like this!

  9. Mirna says:

    First time that I actually regret not going to medical school…Go Eva!

  10. April says:

    It is a stupid question… from a stupid person. Are "you men" really so sad to search for blog articles where women fancy footballers and then comment on them? Or, even better, did you happen upon this blog article because you were searching for Dr. Eva, yourselves? Wouldn't be surprised. Chauvinist lot, some of you are. Shame you make a poor name for the smarter of your persuasion.

  11. LuvinBale says:

    So then I really should have listened to my mother when she told me to pay attention in school and get good grades because you never know where it might lead you later on in life. Well now I know.

    Sorry Mom- you were right!!

    All I can think of is Gareth Bales thighs and how he might be needing a good rub down. DAMN IT!!!

  12. carrie says:

    well, kickette, if men have the right to come here and post such stupid things, we at least deserve the right to voice out our opinion. bring back thumbs down!

    • April says:

      I wonder what they would think of gay men in football, too? Do they pretend it doesn't exist? Pfft.

  13. Kat22 says:

    At least we can spell/use correct grammar: It's ''your'' life – ''you're'' is short for ''you are''. :-)

  14. Shelley says:

    If I was her I'd advise AVB that he needs a good deep muscle massage after the match after all the tension he suffers during the game on the sidelines…..he's so hot *swoon*

    • April says:

      Oh, it's just me… objectifying again, because I am a sad woman that doesn't belong in football…

      But do we think that is AVB's o-face? HA!

      • IrishBlue says:

        Haha! It could very well be, seeing as he looks like he's just exploded in that pic. Oh here comes my overactive imagination!

        So sorry, I'm just a girl. My little brain can only deal with so much.

  15. Steve says:

    Sums up why women should stay out of football.

    • April says:

      Wow… If I could still thumbs down you would certainly receive it. As if men don't take their opportunities to exploit women in sports or, well, most professions. *rollseyes*

      Or maybe you just want to feel up all the guys yourself? Probably…

    • Shelley says:

      Weird that two men created accounts and posted comments within 8 minutes of each other isnt it?! Women may be many things but we are not as stupid as Steve and his alter ego Steve! wa ha ha ha……dumb!

    • mata says:

      Not just completely devoid of any sense of humour, but a misogynist as well. Sums up why so many women have stayed out of football. But baby your reign is OVER. So get used to it.

    • Mrs Q.Borri says:

      Bring back the thumbs down/up button! Period.

      Btw: Eva you go girl!! :)

    • littlegreenpea says:

      Oh really. Because I think that this whole website is about WOMEN that are INTO FOOTBALL…

  16. beri says:

    She's my HERO…that is all!

  17. April says:

    Another blog I read is mostly male-dominated and there are a few guys there that have the hots for her. Whenever a Chelsea player goes down they joke that they've got a "groin strain" just to get a massage ;) Funny how we see the benefit from the other side!

    I am quite envious of her role though with all the possibility in the world of touching Torres or Mata (or even AVB if he gets a little too crazy on the touchline, I suppose). I'm seeing if I can't manage to change that around and get more involved in the sport. Unfortunately, it wouldn't be in medicinal ways. I'll just have to continue to try to touch them in ways that might see me arrested.

  18. Catie2838 says:

    I actually know someone who got their degree in sports medicine specifically so she could feel up basketball players. Well, I'm sure she had other reasons that aren't totally creepy, but that's the one she mentioned the most ;) .

  19. mata says:

    LOL, I've noticed her before and had a good laugh this fall when one of the Chelsea players was down on the pitch with an apparent groin strain and she was out there rubbing it for him, too great a job to be true!

  20. Carolina says:

    Oh that AVB!! *melts*

  21. Carolina says:

    I was wondering who she was!! She caught me by surprise!!

  22. loly says:

    OMG! He is getting hotter and hotter every single day!
    I can't handle all these hotness ( ;

  23. Leah says:

    I have been wondering who she is! Thanks, Kickette.

  24. GaiaBale says:

    I knew I should’ve picked medicine instead of law. Ms Carneiro has all of my respect.

  25. Lauren_BCN says:

    Deam job- work in whatever place that is in whatever connection with football :-) )) Like that lady ( don't know her name ) she is official of a Spanish Football Federation and she is ALWAYS with La Roja boys- hotels, plains…she arrange everything, she controls everything!!! Ahhh imagine having that power :-) ))

    • FootyGirl says:

      I think her name’s Paloma. And yes, I know what you mean. She’s probably the person I envy most in the world. Imagine being paid to hang around Xabi, Pepe and Pique!

    • April says:

      Ohh… I think I know who you are talking about maybe. She definitely seems a club official of some sort… I almost wondered if she was sort of a manager role like you would find in the music business. She seems to have them arranged for scheduling, press, and in general anything that requires organizing outside of VDB and team's realm.