July 6th, 2010

Pre-Season Training: You Can Thank Us Later

Everton’s Jack Rodwell. Thank heavens for pre-season training.

It’s been a long time coming, ladies, but as our some of our favourite boys trickle back into training we’re pleased to report that our campaign work has paid off! The ‘Kickette Guide to Player Etiquette – Skin Edition’ is now being successfully implemented on training grounds across the globe.

Please enjoy the fruits of our labour over the jump. Due to the success of this enterprise we are considering further directives to clubs, including ‘Abolition of Under Armour’ and ‘Soccer in the Nude’. Your thoughts, Kickettes?

NOTE:  While we would love to claim that Chelsea’s new ‘Harry Potter’ training techniques are also our handiwork, we can’t. Because they’re not.

Everton’s Mikel Arteta rolls up the shorts to maximise visible flesh. Mandatory.


Please don’t be under any illusion. Putting on random equipment because you-want-to-give-us-your-abs-but-don’t- want-anyone-to-catch-you-showing-off is Skin Exposure 101.


Niko Krancjar demonstrates Rule 17.6 (b): Unkept hair/beard combos are totally acceptable if you are uber hot. Image via Tottenham Hotspur.


Wayne Bridge understands that shoes are the most important thing in the universe, worthy of intense scrutiny in any circumstance.


Sadly, our directive has not yet reached Duisburg. This upsetting sight merely serves to demonstrate how easily confusion can set in.

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20 Responses to “Pre-Season Training: You Can Thank Us Later”

  1. LoveFootballLoveFootballPlayers says:

    I see now why everyone’s always shopping/vacationing overseas… I took would like some Mikel if anyone knows where the line ends let me know to get my passport ready LOL Yummy. But I still enjoy watching Piquelicious on tv for now. Did anyone else saw while waiting to go out to the field he licked his lips??? WOW I almost passed out out!!! He’s so gorgeous. If only I were a young girl and a foot taller ha ha ha I’m Mexican but I’m starting to like Spain not only for the good footbal they have but their men are super delicious. I envy you Spanish girls :)

  2. JaneSpotting says:

    Oh my! Nice

  3. queenkranjcar says:

    OMG!Nikoo looks so damn hott!love hiiiiim! <3

  4. Barcelona rules! What’s your favorite football team? http://apps.facebook.com/my_footballteam

  5. Moomin says:

    Ooh Niko!

    Loving his beard/scruff combo!

    Bring on August when we get to see his scruffy hotness every week again, it’s been too long!

  6. simone says:

    I'm also watching everton from now on

  7. Katie Smith says:

    mikel arteta is gorgeous

    if only it was from the front

  8. bubbly_cheryl says:

    jack rodwell made my day!- didn't know everton had hotties like him… agree with senora ramos, i also need to take a closer look at everton

  9. julia says:

    mmmm jack rodwell..lookin good ;)

  10. Lu says:

    Jack Rodwell looks so good in that picture. WOW!!

  11. Mrs-arteta says:

    Ahhh, i love pre season with a bit of good weather.

    i would eat mikel.

    He's fabulous!!


  12. Amy says:

    Arsenal have started pre-season training too Kickette! there's some pictures on the Arsenal website, not many, but i suppose you could find more on other sites! Also there's pictures of Chamakh's first Arsenal training session, he's so cute! :D

  13. Venice says:

    Niko!!! Oh how I missed him! <3 <3

    Haven't seen him in soooo long :-(

  14. ElNino9 says:

    Can’t wait to see my Liverpool boys back in training :)

  15. Christina says:

    those are some awsome pictures. Thanks I enjoyed them alot

  16. cescsababe says:

    i'm partial to Mcscruffy Niko myself. ;P

  17. keikoreo says:

    Another case of brilliant investigative work, ladies! Although that last picture made me very sad indeed. Someone ought to take those lads in hand.

  18. senora ramos says:

    wow! that hottie bubba up top. maybe i should have a better look at everton ;)