March 12th, 2010
Product Shill: Adrian Mutu for DOOA
For all the idiots out there who aren’t quite sure how to properly put a t-shirt on, DOOA’s new catalogue featuring the ever-gorge Adrian Mutu will help you wrangle your head into that tricky hole.
The above shot is Step 1: Arms up, head in; fight the urge to cover the tummy. (Because this is obviously the most efficient way for men to show their physique and get dressed simultaneously.)
Note: Due to the rough and tumble nature that is “wearing clothes”, guys should always do their hair last. Except for Mutu. His hair naturally styles itself as if it were going to a Chav/Jersey Shore fancy dress party each day. Which he will have time to do both once he receives his 3 – 4 month ban for doping.
Gently pull the t-shirt down using two hands in order to protect the large, obnoxious logo that should rest comfortably across your pecs. Perform this action slowly so the ladies can clearly see the matching emblazoned boxer briefs.
Mission accomplished: t-shirt is on. Place hands in back pockets and pout with vigour.
Celebrate success by stroking your ego/biceps.