Victoria Beckham's arm is making us hungry 
Kickettes! How are you doing? We’re upright and that’s all that counts. Hope you’ve been enjoying the post-Xmas footy – exciting stuff happening all over the table, no?
So, we’re curious: did everyone’s favorite footballer come for a personal visit to lift your spirits from the depths of hangover hell? We’ve been terribly behaved all year so it was hardly surprising Santa didn’t leave Cesc under the tree for us. Maybe next year.
Here’s what some of the footy lads/ladies have been up to during our mini-break:
David Beckham got a bulldog puppy from wife Victoria as a Christmas present. Subsequently, he gave good face upon arrival in Milan today.
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‘Ballers were full of good deeds this season. Joe Cole dressed like the jolly Saint Nick to visit hospice children; the Manchester United squad sent a few of their best-looking players to brighten some kids’ days in Northern England; and Tottenham teammates divided and conquered five area hospitals to distribute presents and kisses.
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Frank and Elen dined with their kids at his father’s house. And hell no, Bleakley was not present.
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Mamen Sanz took the newest addition to her family, daughter Maria, on her first retail adventure. We are already seething with jealousy and the kid is barely two months old. Is that wrong?
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Cristiano visited Uzbekistan to obtain the world’s ugliest velvet robe fit for a tacktastic king. Oh, and to host some charity projects with Nike.
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Even though we have no photo evidence, we’re gonna put our money on a few WAGs shopping for gifts over at Cricket both before and after the holidays. You can, too, now that Cricket’s new site is live.
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Poor Benzi reminded us that just because you can grow a mean chin-beard-thing, it doesn’t mean you deserve a driver’s license. He was involved in his second car crash - this time a Lamborghini – in two months. Luckily he emerged unscathed.
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Jamie O’Hara bought fiance Danielle Lloyd a new puppy named Bentley. He’s a mini Yorkshire Terrier.
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Totti and Gattuso giggled their way through a Vodaphone ad. This video has been on our “repeat” playlist since last week.
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Baby Bojan was fed to the sharks in a aquarium tank.
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Lucas Poldski did something or other with these elderly women. Grandmas, like the rest of us, heart Poldi.
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Lastly, Paolo Maldini and Christian Panucci were both with their families in Miami. Stalkers, get your digi cams ready and send us your shots!
I normally don’t have much good to say about Cristiano Ronaldo, but at least he was a sport to wear that robe.