February 18th, 2010
Self-Adjustment Situations: A Few Questions
Need a hand, guys?
Not only do Steven Gerrard and Ruud van Nistelrooy show us how they make themselves right at home on the pitch, they raise a storied debate – just why do men feel the need to adjust themselves, ahem, down there?
Whether it be a scratch, a quick movement/realign or what have you, some may find it unattractive while we know ladies who find this swoon-worthy. (Pervs!)
Note: We understand the explanation that sometimes a quick tap here or there is essential to soothe or move but is there anyway to strike a balance between comfort and decorum? Or do footballers check their equipment just because they can?
Although we may the only adoring fans who delighted to see our fave ‘ballers grab their goody bags, we’ve taken on the responsibility of ending the self-adjustment stigma once and for all. Because, frankly, we like it/love it/want more of it.
Questions:
- How is re-adjustment different than protecting one’s self whilst placed in the wall?
- Done in shorts = forgivable. In spandex = peppersprayable. Why?
- Would you rather these guys take the extra two minutes in the tunnel to rearrange themselves away from the lenses or just grope-on-the-go in 2 seconds to get the job done right?
I am in agreement with Deen, Laz & Genghis… Plus these blokes are BLOKES;many men’s hands are never far away from their crotch anyway and adjusting/touching/arranging is just natural. Re footballers adjusting themselves on the pitch “for all the world” to see… I say YES! Be natural, lads, go for it. In my opinion we need to see MORE!
i feel i owe it to my fellow nando lovers to make my usual contribution to this one… http://twitpic.com/143djh
t.h.a.n.k. Y.O.U.
lovely day this
It's called playing pocket billiards, isn't it? In everyday gear, the bloke slips his hand into his pocket and discreetly has a fiddle. (Ever wondered why bloke's trouser pockets always develop holes?) But in his kit he has to dive down the front in full view. Adidas et al could get round this by constructing little side slits on the hips of the shorts so as to give the guys a little camouflage, but personally I'm glad they haven't. Any piccy of Stevie G with a hand on his best tackle is just doodle-dandy by me.
but isn't it gross for other men? I mean, take the on-pitch action as an example: Stevie G here manually n' personally checks if his boys r still in the cage but at the end of the match he shakes hands wth other players??or helps another player up? ew!
btw, Eric and Deen, thnx 4 the clarrification!I always thought it was jst another vulgar and disgusting male habit
Equipment handling before extending a hand & falling down on pitch with gazillions of spit germs = top reasons I could never play football.
As a 26 year old man (and sometime midfield maestro), I feel qualified to answer your questions. In order:
- How is re-adjustment different than protecting one’s self whilst placed in the wall?
Readjustment doesn’t really require a time or place. It’s habit. Protecting yourself in the wall is precisely that: guarding the jewels. They hurt when tampered with in that manner. True story.
- Done in shorts = forgivable. In spandex = peppersprayable. Why?
Modesty. Besides, any male in spandex should be pepper sprayed or reported to child protection services on principle.
- Would you rather these guys take the extra two minutes in the tunnel to rearrange themselves away from the lenses or just grope-on-the-go in 2 seconds to get the job done right?
Your preferences don’t matter. Hands and the “crotchal” region are like magnets…
hahaha i love you kickettes!
Just a theory, but i’m guessing that guys keep readjusting themselves ‘down there’ for the same reason us girls readjust ourselves ‘up there’ (the breast area in case it wasn’t clear!) – for self comfort and so our ‘parts’ feel ‘secure’ and not hanging out/moulded in an unattractive or embarrassing way!?!
just a guess though!
nice!
BFFs do it together: http://cli.gs/sahRt6
ladies, ladies, when men wear tights, or anything to help control the… ahem… bouncing…. it can get a little uncomfortable and a readjustment is needed. when i play, it happens all the time. sweat, tight spaces, our little men just dont like those conditions. and its really bothersome, hence the much needed fix.
Mind my is stuck on Stevie atm. Thank you for that picture. Steeevvviiieee. <3
Ruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuud!
Here are the two most compelling reasons:
1) To check if all of them are still there. This is more so with athletes who are running. jumping, kicking, sliding and are more physically active than most men.
2) "The contents of the pants" (your description that should be in the dictionary) want to get out, be seen and perform almost every five minutes. They need to be pattedd down as in down boy, down.
I hope this helps.
Best.
One.
EVER.
Just saying, lol. I think I say this once a week
I like MrsNesta's idea. Epic win.
Us “innies” will never know the feelings of the “outies”. And Lenny you are awesome!
Sorry to be annoying, but it’s spelled “van Nistelrooy.”
And MrsNesta, that has to be the best idea that I have ever heard. Getting paid would be fantastic, but I would be willing to pay them to give me the job.
Not just footballers or athletes. All males like to do this. From little boy babies to old men. Their hands are always down there unless you give them something else to keep them busy.
Self-Adjustment should be banned, and just like in tennis they should have ball girls(women) and I will be the first to volunteer, but if I got paid for it then all the better! The serious situation would be which team would you adjust for, hoping there would be a transfer window for a bit of variety
Win.
Ooh thanks Kickette, may send an email to UEFA/FIFA with my idea and how it would work
@Mrs. Nesta
I saw Sandro making adjustments & tucking in his shirt in the tunnel Tuesday night. I think he is on board with your plan. He had those Adidas shorts stretched so wide a couple of ball girls (you & I) could climb on in & be on hand to adjust as needed during the match. Pun intended.
LMAO I'm there already (hurray for wide adidas shorts)!!!!!!!! I am soooooooo jealous you got to see that, was you at the game or did you see it on tv?
"…dip in their goody bags", haha! This does happen once every couple of games I watch, what is bloke's obsession with that part?
Most of these questions i think none of us Kickettes can answer! lol
i think all of us wouldn't want to see any of our co workers or class mates do it in front of us, but seeing footballers do it, we find it amusing..?
i don't know XD
Yeah, that’s exactly my view.
It doesn't stay in one place, that's why. Even with compression shorts, it can move. It is necessary to readjust for comfort.
'Pool gals- would you like us to provide Lenny's deets to the bad jokes police ? Or just let you have your way instead?