September 27th, 2010

Spanish Studs & Duds: Carles Puyol, Kaká, Mikel Arteta

Image: Twitter.

Whether they’re born and bred, or foreigners calling the Iberian country their home away from home, there’s plenty of water-cooler fodder oozing out of Spain and its La Liga to fill this site for weeks. Thus, we’re putting a (hopefully) fun twist on our, ahem, regular feature Good Week/Bad Week to rate the highs and lows of the recent off-field antics of Spain’s main men. Be so kind to grace us with your presence?

Carles Puyol’s Pouch Power
It’s a case of the haves v. the have-nots. As in, the fabu Carles Puyol has himself a beer belly, while his new lady friend Malena Costa does not appear to have tummy bloat. Irregardless, Puyol earns bragging rights for the week, especially after Costa supposedly ditched her summer fling thing, Javier Hidalgo, in favour of his infamous moppy head of hair.

Verdict: Stud. Don’t agree? See more sultry pics of Malena here and get back to us.

Kaká’s Duets Against The Devil
Seems as Caroline Celico’s debut gospel album moved the masses in more ways than one. So much so that, her husband, Real Madrid’s Kaká has recorded his own song – a love ballad to his wife. Singing about the couple’s dating and mating history, highlighting their 2005 marriage and son’s birth in 2008, the song is fraught with religious references. “Presente de Deus” or “Gift of God”, will be part of an upcoming 12 track album featuring the married singing duo; however, this is the only song written by the athlete. Oh, happy day.

Verdict: Dud. If you haven’t already noticed, we’re not exactly the innocent choir girls our mama’s would have liked us to be.

Family Man Mikel
Lorena Bernal, Mikel Arteta and their son, Gabriel, took a stroll through the streets of Liverpool this weekend. Other than the Everton star looking immortally fit, there wasn’t much else to see. [Image: Hola! magazine]

Verdict: Stud. For obvious, blue-blooded female reasons.

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87 Responses to “Spanish Studs & Duds: Carles Puyol, Kaká, Mikel Arteta”

  1. Dorema Mens says:

    f u c k

  2. Dorema Mens says:

    fuck u all

  3. Protecta says:

    I have the same dress!!!!
    It's from Zara !!!!!
    wtf puyol isn't rich enough to buy her expensive clothes .. –'

  4. Selena says:

    She looks really young…Anyone tell me how old she is????
    I hate being a paedo and google her if she's like…12?

  5. loveu2much says:

    they dont look good together

  6. Jules says:

    Puyi does not have a beer belly, see when he whipped off his jersey post Bilbao match. I know many people think he’s ugly but I would like to applaud Carles for being one of the few members of the Spanish NT to consistently take off his shirt without any nasty base layers hiding underneath. If he could say, convince Xavi and Iker and Villa, he’d earn a place in my Top 5.

  7. Eleanor says:

    I think Puyol is attractive, but his hair does nothing for him.

  8. Georgina Sanders says:

    Puyi sometimes gives a good face, gives a bad face and gives a really bad face in pics and in the telly. He needs to work on his facial angles and expressions much harder than the usual footballers if he wants to pass the Kickette majority approval of gorgeousness. His body, on the other hand, I can work with anytime, anywhere (wink) with beer belly or w/o because his body just looks like it's so savage. Like it's gonna leave you breathless for hours (another wink with sly smile). His current girl, on the other hand, really looks like the typical unknown model who wants to boost her career by dating someone rich and popular so she can get hooked with the tabloids and making people think that she is a top dog in her career (*uhmIrinauhm*). I'll give them until December and that's about it. If they exceed that time, I will consider their relationship to just be complete bulls…

    Kaka composing AND singing? Hahahaha! WTF?
    Seriously, WTF?

    Mikel Arteta, YUM. No need to further describe him.

  9. Anja says:

    Puyi's ribs have always stuck out. Definitely not a beer belly.

  10. DebC says:

    Puyol, i thought was married w/ children, guess not. He has such a terrific body, and it sort of looks like a beer belly. She is hot though.

  11. Jackie says:

    Puyol's body is hot! His face… not so much.

  12. jamtartheart says:

    It's not a beer belly, it's his giant tough-guy ribcage! :) Puyi is the hottest thing going; so happy to see him on Kickette with his new sweet young thing!

  13. Grammar Police says:

    "Irregardless" is not a word.

  14. @AgnesWonka says:

    Caroline Celico, you can't fight the devil! but you can get a real job…Idk!

  15. Missy Manchester says:

    Re: Carles Puyol
    1. Malena Costa seems to be a Spanish version of Danielle Lloyd. Maybe Kickette should do a "6 degrees of skankocity" test on this one.
    2. OoooOoo Kickette…please banish the non-word… "irregardless" …from your dictionary!


    Dear Kaka:
    God blessed you with angelic feet–not poetic powers or a heavenly voice. Leave the singing to Il Divo.

  16. D0li says:

    I find it amazing that Cristiano's WAG Iryna gets bad press for taking advantage of him, but the girl Puyol's with doesn't get any! It is obvious based on his appearance and the age difference that she is only in it for the attention. Maybe she prefers older men, but honestly I doubt it.

    • DeeRoma says:

      I give this Malena girl the benefit of the doubt. Cristiano's WAG just opens her mouth and people dislike her. Not only for the whole setting Women's Lib back to the 1800's but also because she sounds so full of herself it makes her instantly unlikeable.

    • Pique_Xavi says:

      Well I think Malena being labeled already as a golddigger is not quite good press, lol. I mean we don't even know if the girl is into old guys which some young and beautiful girls are and/or maybe she's rich. I however doubt that but we don't know for sure lol… I'll apologize if that is true.

      • blitzenTO says:

        "Old guys"??? He's 32, not 52!

        • Pique_Xavi says:

          LOL Sorry didn't implied to call him old that way but the girl is in her early 20's no? big age difference and my cousin who are her age call guys like him "old" no offense to Puyi, as I am often referred as old too by my younger cousins.

          • caitanya says:

            it is relative to the person. Many people in this world don't care about an age difference like that. Besides, when i was 9, i thought 19 was "old" :-)

            I agree with others that i think she's in it for the money. He is not attractive–he looks like a caveman! He has to cut that hair. Yikes!

            • Pique_Xavi says:

              Well caitanya I wasn't implying that age should matter because I know some people don't see/have a problem with that, honestly I do believe me, as I have been labeled a cradle robber myself, lol. So it can be a possibility she's attracted to the guy. But they don't seem like they are thinking of a long term relationship and just "enjoying" themselves.

              Puyi may not be your typical pretty boy but oh my that body of his is to die for. And well the face kills it for me personally because he looks like my cousins' dad except the hair on him is more wavy and thicker and well not even if he were born again could he have such a nice body, lol. Can't stop thinking of that locker room video… lucky Queen.

          • juliefromparis says:

            My husband is 34 and im 25, u can see im younger than him but people dont stop and stare in the street!! age diff tween Puyi and the young “miss no tummy” is no big deal to me.

  17. JulieFromParis says:

    humhum… no tummy bloat AND no underwears it seems…

  18. JulieFromParis says:

    HAHA Wait! Mikel smiling on a picture? Waoooww strange :) Must say i love when you bitchface Mikel.

  19. Pique_Xavi says:

    Puyi congrats! You are rich, famous and have a hot body. Enjoy your wild nights while you still can. Its not like you are using the girl since she's pretty much enjoying the attention she's getting. Just look at those pics the girls is posing like she's in a commercial and that girl with blue dress and black boots? Honey don't drink if you can handle it, someone please get her a chair before she falls flat face to the ground, lol. Seriously though, as long as he enjoys himself and she obviously gets something out of it its okay in my book. One day the LADY of his dreams will trap him with love not lust and he will forget about the wagabees to surely come. Doesn't seem she'll be the one to get to have his little tarzans… She's really pretty hopefully that's not all that she has to offer only time will tell but uh! that hand/arm…. not sure what she's doing but doesn't look attractive at all.

  20. Eebza says:

    she is hot. puyol….not so much

  21. Zinny says:

    Hmm. Puyol's WAG is pretty but time will tell how she takes her new found "fame". I'm wary of these so called model types (Read: Irina Shayk).

    Oh Kaka. You can't do everything, darling. You may have the face of an angel but your singing voice is not in the same category. I have heard the song and I can't get past 45 seconds.

  22. Maribel says:

    I can't condone puyol and stud in the same sentence! LOL! let's face it, if he wasn't a talented and rich footballer, that girl probably wouldn't talk to him. I do agree with the other two verdicts though!

    • orangerie says:

      are you seeing this, lotte?!!

      • Lotte (Zlatanista) says:

        I just did!! Well with that body and that combination of hellfire attitude and sweet nature, he could be the broke "boy next door"! He would still be awesome.

    • Leya_S says:

      I'm not personally a Puyol girl, but I can understand his appeal.
      A lot of women (and men) think he's really hot, footballer/filthy rich/super famous or not…

  23. orangerie says:

    if she really is his WAG, i'm pretty disappointed in puyi at the moment… thought he wasn't the kind to fall for the party-going model type… always had the impression he'd go for someone with a more meaningful existence____*read: sour grapes*

  24. Bri says:

    Kaka, dear Kaka…I love you oh so much but please please please no more awkward attempts at projecting your religious beliefs to the masses. We know. You belong to Jesus.

  25. MadridistaJenn says:

    Kudos to Puyi for scoring such a cutie as his bed mate of the moment. Fear not, ladies, that is not a WAG, she's his 21 year old plaything.
    And that "presente" from casa de Kaká….its weird. It is definitely one of those cheesy songs that's geared toward the purity audience. The only way I'm buying that album is if Caroline and Kaká get raunchy and remake "My Humps" with video!

  26. hereforthenando says:

    I have this weird thing for Carlos Puyol; I find the man to be sexually irresistible. I think it dates back to the Puyol v. Pique Thursday Thigh-Off where Kickette pointed out that caveman/Tarzan hot is a legit kind of hot. Come on, he would swing in on a vine and go to town on you. That's hot.

  27. gin_in_teacups says:

    I object to Kaka's song being labeled a dud. Not that I've actually heard it or anything but come on, we all know that if that man wrote and sang a song for us, no matter how Jesus-y it was, our panties would be off before he hit the chorus.

  28. ToffeeGirl17 says:

    MINE! *coughs* Sorry, just laying claims on Arteta :P . Oh, buddy, this weekend was not yours. You just had to miss that stunner and now you are looking all hot and bothered. Lorena is one lucky lady for sure! Got to love the Artetas, down to earth, private and geniune nice people. Got to love the team too *winks*.

    2 out of 3 duds and the only stud is looking fine!


    • thea says:

      You tell him girl – Everton soooo need to get back on track this season!

      AND BTW the camera angel is all wrong – Puyol does not have a gutt, he was archinh is back!

      • ToffeeGirl17 says:

        Give them until November then feel nervous. I am used to this by now. They will be get back on track soon!

        Still not my type Thea. Missed you girl.

        But then when I have Howard, Arteta, Cahill, Rodwell, Jags, Billy and several others on the same team why would I need anymore? :P

  29. Eli aka NG says:

    Puyol's never been my cup of tea, but I'm so angrily jealous of this girl…she's gorgeous

  30. mila_casillas says:

    Holy hell how much did Puyi drink to get that belly in one night?! 0_o

  31. Mia Bellouere says:

    A guy in the picture, (just below the main one) has red eyes, creepy huh? (He is on the right hand side, next to Puyi's new 'girlfriend') Sorry, I just had to point that out ;) ^ I sorta agree with you gals up there, she looks a bit dodgy, WAGabee in the making maybe?

  32. Katie says:

    Mikel Arteta is gorgeous.

  33. BarceLisa says:

    I agree with Lotte, it is not a beer belly and even if it was, I would not love Puyi any less. Beer belly means there is more of Puyi to love! Not crazy about Malena, she seems a bit iffy to me.

    "we’re not exactly the innocent choir girls our mama’s would have liked us to be." LMAO

    Lorena is one of my top 5 favourite WAGs, she always looks great. I'm loving the mini adidas trainers on Gabriel.

    • Lotte (Zlatanista) says:

      Sorry about my exaggerated respons, i just have this unstoppable urge to defend Puyi always :) . And you are right, more of Puyi is a good thing.

  34. meh says:

    puyol, i fel sick.

  35. Lotte (Zlatanista) says:

    Nope, don´t approve!! She looks like a wannabe golddigger (or am i just jealous?) And Puyi HAS NOT GOT A BEER BELLY!!