February 22nd, 2012

The F5 Rejig: How’s Marco Coping?

Image: Valerio Pennicino/Getty Images Europe.

We know how important the Finest 5 list is to you guys. Our¬†beleaguered comments moderator’s refusal to come out from underneath her desk when we do an update tells us that.

But in your haste to complain at us for leaving out the likes of Sergio, Aaron, Fernando and David James (ahem), have you lot even stopped to think about the effect that these lists have on the players? The agony of rejection, the realisation that your goods are no longer sufficient to keep the Kickette staffers visually stimulated?

The pressure must be awful.

Borriello Camila hot hurt AS Roma sexy shower hair

Image: Valerio Pennicino/Getty Images Europe.

Take Marco Borriello, for instance. Before the latest list broke free last Tuesday, we could clearly see his nerves and almost felt his sweaty palms as he anxiously awaited the news.

And when he found out he’d slipped from second to fourth in the definitive meter of ‘baller hotness?

Let’s just say he didn’t take it too well.

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18 Responses to “The F5 Rejig: How’s Marco Coping?”

  1. footballa says:

    I found out where Marco's tattoo ends!!!

  2. Tyler Thew says:

    Strongest take I’ve seen on the subject yet. Great job Colin.

  3. I’ve visited your site for quite some time now. I don’t comment. I wanted to make you aware I tried getting onto your page yesterday but your site wouldnt come up

  4. liz says:

    I'm pretty sure all the posts about ramsey being on F5 were mine…
    it looks like it's working though.
    i think sergio should go straight to the Hot H.o.F and well, aaron needs to get on F5. probably in place of borri…

  5. Alisha says:

    I think Borri is coping better than me, I still can't get over Sex Fabregas losing top spot…

  6. littlegreenpea says:

    Why don't you make a finest-fifteen?
    The knicks play tonight, I'm so excited :)

  7. rslkdl says:

    It's okay Borri, baby. You're still #1 on my list.

  8. Mrs. Q.Borri says:

    Don't worry Borri, I will always be loyal to you. Even if you wear a trash can on your face, even if you are homeless living on the streets with a big fat beard. I won't care, I will still grab your fine piece of … !! Seriously I mean it. With that said I'm so glad you are on the F5, cause you so deserve it!!! Your hotness is unforgetable…

    Want help with that leg, call me and I be there! ;)

  9. Kristine says:

    I don't care if you keep Borri, just put the damn Ramos on the freaking list! Jeeze Louise!

    • Catie2838 says:

      Seriously!! I have to say Kickette, your love of Ramos is obvious and as overflowing as ours. And yet you still like to see him cry in the corner and try to soothe his broken heart with bad tattoos. Stop the madness!

  10. gigi says:

    Hey, let's not abuse my (ok Kickettes, our) poor Borri. The man's still trying to pull his stuff together after she who will not be named, what ultimately turned out to be the Roma fiasco, and the unfriendly "welcome" he got from the right-wing Juve tifosi. Marco is ten kinds of fine, and except for what some people have taken out of context as a sexist remark (y'all need to know the sordid story with the ex to understand), he's proven himself to be a pretty nice guy. Just one thing though–can he trim those loopy forelocks already? I'd offer to fly to Italy and do it for him but I'm pretty sure that would result in a restraining order.

  11. stargirlcandy says:

    What do u guys have with Borrielo? He's so fine,

  12. Poor Borri! All these heartless comments are clearly causing him undue stress. He's very sensitive you know. He clearly needs comforting. I'd volunteer, but I'm afraid I might have to fight the Kickette girls, and I'd deffo lose:)

    The Blossom Shed – scent, style, skin.

  13. IrishBlue says:

    Sorry, he's just gotta go.

  14. zoraida says:

    believe it or not, i couldnt care less about mr borri………
    please PLEASE bring senor torres back. we desperately miss him!

    • tia says:

      yah…s**ew Borri, ever since El Nino was removed, he has been to sad to score , poor poor sad little Nando -the evil women in the kickette army took him off the list and took away his Mojo….no Nino, no RAMOS Tm clearly they are trying to handicap Spain before the Euros…..

      • April says:

        Goodness… could that be it?!?! I wonder… Torres hasn't been scoring in the game because he hasn't been able to score with the ladies at the Kickette office? Poor Nando. I volunteer to help him feel better. Mmhmm.

      • zoraida says:

        haha YES! i hadn't thought about that..
        oh god.. evil EVIL kickette army ladies…! :)