April 21st, 2010
The F5 Vote: Xabi Alonso v. Marco Borriello
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So we’re devious. Dastardly, even. You can hate us if you want. But this is the F5. It’s important.
As we all hit the midweek hump, we’re forcing our opinionated readers to stare into the windows of their deepest fangirl souls. We’re not going to let anyone get comfortable, making leisurely – but largely safe – choices based on torsos, thighs or coiff.
Rather, today is about opposites: Vanilla versus Chocolate. Chequered Wallet versus Chequered Past. Protection versus Pregnancy.
And we need to know: what kind of woman are you?
Please bear in mind that your preference here is indicative of your personality type. We must warn you that your choice could affect future career prospects and your ability to obtain credit.
Welcome to the F5 – Good v. Evil edition. Ay Dios Mio.
XABI ALONSO, REAL MADRID
One of the most fashionable footballers in the world is such a nice guy it nearly hurts. Not only has he had the honour of donning the cover of Esquire, but he makes one sinfully delish marketing ploy.
Even though he’s a shy guy, he’s made of a mean chest rug and washboard stomach.
You need more?
He’s an ovary explosion aficionado. Proved capable of pulling off the unofficial uniform of the Spanish NT which is something of a curveball for others. And he can play a bit, as well.
Only downsides?
He broke hearts with his Liverpool to Madrid club transfer. His kid is known to throw a public temper tantrum every now and then. We can live with it.
-
MARCO BORRIELLO, AC MILAN
The type of guy who turns up late and offers up nothing but a big, fat FAIL, Marco Borriello ain’t got no shame in his game. His body is one of the best; so wickedly good, in fact, that he doesn’t wear suits. Suits wear him.
You need more?
Beckham likes his butt. He enjoys sex. And he showers in plain view of cameras. Despite the fact that we know that any date with this dude would invariably end in tears and a visit to a clinic, we still want him. In the worst possible way.
Only downsides?
The semi-smutty, semi-we-wanna-see-where-it-ends hip tattoo. If Xabi is safe for school, Marco’s penchant for public sex is most definitely not safe for work (which, if we’re already headed to Hades, then we can admit was quite h-o-t).
Apparently, we all have the morals of an alley cat.
Whatever.
—–
A quick reminder: Voting (which is via the poll below) will be open until 5am GMT/Midnight EST on Friday, 23 April; Only one of the footballers in each offered pairing will be included in the Finest Five 4.0 list; The new Finest Five list will be revealed on Monday the 26th.
Also: Inappropriate comments will be deleted.
COMMENTS & VOTING ARE NOW CLOSED
Xabi. <3
This is evil!!! Can one ever choose between such high levels of hotness??
classy v skanky? has to be classy.
There is no contest: Xavi Alonso all the way.
He has a great F- you attitude on the pitch yet maintains cool and composure all the while. I love him! Plus, he’s spanish (lub dub)
Xabi Alonso completely broke my heart. There were months when I couldn't look at a picture of him without almost crying in a lame, embarrassing way.
I love you Xabi. I only want the best things for you.
You get my vote.
Has it crossed anyone’s mind here that Xabi is not that squeaky clean??? Me thinks Xabi can do the nasty. So I’m goin’ for Xabi. He’s got juuuuuust the right mix. hahahaha. ^^
Even though a night with March would undoubtedly be pretty good, I think I'm going to plump for Xabi. What can I say, I like nice boys
March??? Marco even!
Xabi, Xabi, Xabi…EVERTIME – ALL the time
MARCO BORRIELLO!!!!!
Marco)
i just realised there is now no possiblity of cesc, fernando, and iker all making this list. and that if they are nominated two of them will be against each other. noooooooooooo.
mrsnesta made me sad when she made me realise that they have all been from different countries and xabi is the sole spainard so far. i mean they can't not have more spainards, right? RIGHT?! (a bit hysterical right now)
sh….it’s ok. Xabi is by no means the hottest of the Spaniards, they’re probably just saving the best for last. (and if this does not include Cesc I will legitimately cry). I mean, who could possibly top them? Right? *okay now i’m getting hysterical as well*
Ladies – you have far too much time on your hands!
stop judging us!
just because i'm a total insomniac and this is more entertaining than failing at sleeping…
well, it's 11:15 am here. and my job sucks, so, there's that. and i mean, it's hot ballers. everyone has time for that. lol
11:15 am? lucky you….
and yes hot footballers >>>> pretty much everything else that would take up my time. except sleep. okay, not even that.
This is possibly the most evil thing you have done, Kickette.
But, XABI all the way!
Marcooooo
Neither of them does much for me, to be honest. I mean, I love Xabi, but not like that. We're just friends
So….convince me, someone. My vote is up for grabs.
marco is just another typical boring "hot" guy.
xabi is absoultely gorgeous
arhhh, you make a good point. I keep changing my mind, I voted marco… but as beautiful as he is, xabi is loooovely.
molly, mrsnesta, and juventina have some convincing arguements for marco, i’ve seen no one trying for xabi
Aww thanks!!!
thanks for the cred hun!:)
trust me, us Marco girls have been soldiering for him down here. Scroll down a little further and theres lots of photographic/video evidence!
*shrugs* Marco it is, just for something new. Kickette, you had better put my love Cescito in the next set of nominations. AND NOT AGAINST FERNANDO DAMMIT.
Thanks girl! For the record I hope they put Cesc up too!
no problem
AUGH I KNOW. HE NEEDS A TROPHY, POOR BB. and we all know F5>>>>league title. okay, not really. but.
LOL I know what you mean!! This is important! It is recognizing the beauty that is footballers!
Thank you for voting for Marco
!!!
Marco…. oh Marco the things I would do to him!!!
So Marco might give you something that isn’t gift-wrapped or sparkly? Ugh. Xabi is so cool, even though he broke my poor red heart. Xabi.
Marco Borriello is yum, yum, yum and a bowl of whatever’s going with it.
Xabi Xabi Xabi!!!!
That Marco guy seems kind of evil…I like bad, but not evil. Xabi has something special. So Xabi
Marcoooooooooooo <333
I believe my exact response to the shirtless!Marco was “mnnugh” so there’s really no option.
I don’t get the whole obsession with Borriello, although he’s not a bad looking guy…so Xabi all the way!
Even with that ginger beard…
Kickette – I do hope Nando is gonna turn up on this list soon! And not against someone like Gerrard/Fabregas/Villa please?
Thanks
Xabi, hands down!
haha, clever! my vote is for the squeaky clean xabi.
Um…tough one…NOT! Xabi any time, even though he left my team and they are rubbish without him, it will always be him <3
i voted for Xabi, just to stay loyal to Madrid
but damn…Marco……………..
speechless.
That's the perfect picture – angel and devil haha! This is so hard for me but I'd go with Xabi!
No contest, Xabi every time :p
Marco Marco Marco x infinity! You can’t be infinity! See, he should win! Such a rediculously gorgeous man! I should make Vote for Marco tshirts! HMM
OMG you should…I want one!!!!
Ooh me three
oooh! I want a tshirt! LOLOL
Marco, ovviamente. Belen and the STDs are in the past and DAMN he’s hot. And Italian. So really, no question. I’ve seen where that tattoo ends. Unf. Xabi doesn’t stand a chance.
At this point Xabi reminds me of the cute librarian that lives next door… he no longer inspires any sort of attraction. I’d wave if I saw him on the street and probably smile because his kids is so adorable, but Marco. Oh Marco.
You’ve seen where the tattoo ends?! LOL Lucky you
Yes! Belen and STD are all in the past!! He’s a changed man now!
How does one end up in a situation, where one sees the full Borriello hip tattoo? I wanna know!
oh god how can i choose?I mean I love Xabi he's smoldering but Marco is so…bad and evil it's quite the turn on.as one commenter said 'if Marco is the devil how do I get to hell?' I tink i'll go with……Xabi.Marco may jus be a lil to dirty for me
Xavi Is definately spains best export
Wrong Spaniard
Xabi. He broke my heart, but he’s Xabi. Plus, I just never really saw the Borriello attraction. Sorry ladies.
Marco Borriello is not my best football player, but I was told to vote Marco, so I an
*am
Thank you Lugia!!!
Xabi… the ovary exploding angel!
I see the choice being between Xabi and living happily ever after, or a moment of fun with Borriello.
I have to go with the moment of fun. Marco is soooooooooooooooo hot. Mmmmm. I he insisted on driving me somewhere in his audi, I would jump right in.
I wub him!
XABI!!!!!! not even a contest in my eye.
Any man who can make a ginger beard look that good deserves more than a vote.
This is not even a hard choice for me…
IT'S MARCO MARCO MARCO (I wish I was yelling that out with him on a regular basis) all the way (seriously Marco, let's go all the way!!).
He is the bad boy a lot of girls would drop their good guy for.
Damnnnnnnnnnnn what I would give for one night with him!
"I wish I was yelling that out with him on a regular basis" OMG GIRL FOR REAL! What I would give to wake up next to that!!!!
Xabi's a million times hotter. But Marco's the kind of man you can imagine chaining you to his bedposts and throwing away the keys.
Obviously Marco then.
Xabi!!
xabi all the way! xabi xabi!
i'm tired of being good, so imma go with MARCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.:D
For the record, Marco isn’t all about getting naked and doing dirty things in the water. He has broken up with that Belen because she cheated on him. He is very close with his brother and his mom. In fact, he threw a birthday party for his mom’s 60th birthday in Milan where he found out he was going to be an uncle next fall.
http://i784.photobucket.com/albums/yy128/juventina5/Borriello%20Love/marzo_2010.jpg
He also happens to look quite good fully clothed:
http://i784.photobucket.com/albums/yy128/juventina5/Borriello%20Love/000002w.jpg
http://i784.photobucket.com/albums/yy128/juventina5/Borriello%20Love/tato_mio_42_.jpg
AND! He wears glasses!
http://i784.photobucket.com/albums/yy128/juventina5/Borriello%20Love/000031w_1_.jpg
Aww great pictures and I think his gram-gram made him that knitted sweater
. AWWWWW he loves his Nan!!!!!
OMG she probably did just like his Nonna hat!!!
http://i784.photobucket.com/albums/yy128/juventina5/Borriello%20Love/io_pamela_capodanno.jpg
http://i784.photobucket.com/albums/yy128/juventina5/Borriello%20Love/191209.jpg
http://i784.photobucket.com/albums/yy128/juventina5/Borriello%20Love/nagl.jpg
Nonna hat of love<3
Me want a Nonna hat of love!
I want a Nonna hat too!!!
You’re a champion for the cause, sorella! Love having more Serie A and Italian supporters on here. Makes a romanista want to give a juventina a good snuggle. ;P
PS: my mom is romanista, so I hear all about the rivalry, but its funny now she feels sorry for Juve! LOL
Your mom has great taste.
I feel sorry for Juve, partially b/c Roma were in the same position last season. But Juve are a great team and will be great again, no question about it.
LOL That's the same reason my mom pities us! She's like we were there…don't worry you will come back! I'm just having trouble seeing the light at the end of the tunnel!
LOL! For real! you have no idea! Marco does not deserve to be known as an STD-carrying womanizer! He isn’t!! He was cheated on! He loves his mommy! And damn it he is so hot! LOL! He deserves to be on this list more than Torsten Frings, in my opinion, and therefore I will not go down without at fight! Amo il mio Borriello…and coming from a Juventina, thats a big step!! haha
Yes, I don't think the intention is malice in the writing… but not sure all of the readers see through the cheekiness. Maybe it's my advanced age, haha. Things aren't quite so black & white anymore when you're an oldie like me. Marco's had many ladies and unfortunately was burned (and marred!) by one skanky ho. He bounced back beautifully!
Exactly! I know what your saying! He bounced back hotter than before! I mean he’s scoring goals left and right and his new haircut is to die for! I’m proud of him!
He wears glasses and he’s friends with Mr Seedorf, love him!
It’s not that Marco isn’t hot hot hot, but I’ll take Xabi all day every day, breakfast lunch and dinner.
The only person I’m willing to risk a hypothetical STD for is Cristiano. Hence, my vote goes to Xabi….on the grounds that he shaves regularly!
mmmmm marco
easy choice! LOVE the bad boys
Marco. His beautiful face is my desktop.
Easiest decision ever! Borriello!! Xabi is nice & all but *yawn*
you have forced my hand… Xabi, if I must!
this one is a lesser of two yukkers to me… LOL.. I am SO gonna get roasted for this comment.
I am a good, good girl. Come give me my award, Xabi.
XABI
XABI! i’d be happy spooning with him… just as long as he talks to me all night with his cute spanish lisp!
why do people hate the beard?
i think it’s ok …
Trust me, I LOVE the ginger beard.
oh good, i though i was the only one
me too. only xabi is a sexy ginger
Very true!
The picture of Marco in the water with that, uh, girl was enough to make me choose Xabi. Eww. Plus the ginger beard.
Exactly, the beard!
Bah, Xabi is so popular on kickette
He has a ginger beard for god’s sake!!!
Marco ftw, he should really be against Torsten or someone like that in the interest of fairness (i.e. so he’ll win…)
I actually LOLed! That’s hilarious! I’ve never heard the ginger beard thing before! Hahaha I also agree about the Torsten thing
Xabi, without doubt
Ay Dios Mio is right. Damnit, Kickette. This is so hard!!!! You ask too much; this decision is horrid!! :/
Marco for me.
“Also: Inappropriate comments will be deleted.”
Can there be an comment be made that would actually be “inappropriate” where Borriello is concerned? I mean everything pretty much fits, regardless of what it is…
That said, and because I won a lot of money off Xabi’s leaving crushing Liverpool… Xabi wins my vote
Xabi.
Strangely easy for me, this one.
Xabi, since I don’t really feel Borriello. Yes, handsome but…too top-model like.
Oh my God! MARCO MARCO MARCO!! I worship that gorgeous Italian. He has earned and deserves a place in the F5!! xoxo
MARCO BORRIELLO for me, I’ve never really been a good girl so why start now (although I do love Xabi
) And that Tattoo is not a downside!!!!
I agre MrsNesta that tattoo is sexy!!!! How is it a downside???
Xabi all the way. I like my Finest Five sans STDs.
He doesn’t have one thanks
FOR THE RECORD! Marco does not have an STD anymore! Although Belen probably has a few. So I was steer clear of her.
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!! THAT SLUT-SLUT giving him a bad rep!!!!
Lol yeah she's definitely the skank!
She is a shank!!! VOTE FOR MARCO LADIES!!!!
Thank you Michael
Of Course Marco Borriello
Xabi, definitely. Marco is hotter but his attitude is a bit perverse. I choose Xabi because he's a gentleman, i like his charm and his ginger beard (i don't understand why most of people don't like the beard LOL) and plus: spaniard, don't say anymore about this xD). I would vote for Marco but after this post i see him like a personality similar to C.Ronaldo and i don't even like CR
Ö How can you compare MarcOOOOH, to Ronaldo. Marco is soooooo much more classy. At least his past hook-ups are hot. He has good taste. Ronaldo goes for anything that breaths it seems.
Plus Marco is so hot it's ridic. Ronaldo looks like a bad version of Latino Ken.
OH MY GAH, WITHOUT A SINGLE DOUBT…
MARCO BORRIELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!
He makes me feel all kinds of feelings, lol
literally, the hottest football player on the planet.
100% agree!
sigh. this is really like choosing b/t chocolate covered strawberries and chocolate covered caramels. you just want them both!!
Guess it's not easy having the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other!
XABI. EVERY SINGLE TIME XABI. HE IS THE LOVE OF MY LIFE. XABI ALONSO BROKE MY HEART BUT I KEEP COMING BACK TO HIM.
Sorry for the shouting. Xabi gets me all riled up.
Marco who?
Go Xabi. That's a clear one …
I'm going for Mario – Xabi's to blah for my tastes. Xabi stands out in the RM line up because he can co-ordinate his outfits – if he played for fashionista team you wouldn't notice him!
UGH! Talk about the battle of good vs evil
I normally don't like man-hos BUT since Xabi (i think) will give us less realistic fantasy time bec he's a papaw now (which God knows I need 
), I'll take Marco and his side hip tattoo 
Hail the sexyness that is Marco 
All hail Marco!
I’m actually side-tracked by the thought that my DAVEEED might not be in the list. Gawd! But we’re armed and ready for Operation: Soul Patch! Lord pls pls pls let them have David on the list
Some of you ladies have really delicate sensibilities, wow. This was a cruel, cruel decision for me. But… I have voted and it was a hard choice.
And that's all I'm saying on the subject.
Easiest one yet. Xabi!
Xabi is 29 but looks like an old fart. MARCO BORRIELLO all the way!!! :>
Xabi is 28 and looks about 12!
12?! lmao you cant be serious. He is sooo old looking
There is nothing hotter than Xabi Alonso.
who is Marco?
Xabi all the way.. We miss you
ynwa.
"Who is Marco?" You're kidding right? Borri is stunned.
this was tough, but in the end I went with…..
XABI!
xabiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii
why kickette. why. i had no problems the last 2 days. then you spring this on me. can i get back to you in a year, b/c that's how long it will take me to pick.
marco v xabi. xabi v marco.
i feel like the fact that xabi plays for my team should make this easier. but it's not. holy hell, ladies. WHY?!?!?!?!
Here's a deal breaker, if you vote Marco today, I will vote for whoever you want the next two days? Its worth a try lol
Me too!!! Vote for Marco!!!
i still have to give this some thought. how long do i have again?
well, molly and mrsnesta, i don’t think you would agree with my terms. of course it would be to vote for el ramos. what wuold you do if he was up against iker. that’s a very easy choice for me, but i don’t know if i could count on you ladies (or even expect you to honor your promises, i’m not a meanie)
xabi is a merengue. a hot, ginger bearded sweetheart who puts out beautiful bubbas. and did you see the pic of him for the bartha match. swoon.
marco is sex on a stick. and so yummy regardless of past exploits. and i have a thing for bad boys.
ARGH! don’t make me choose! it’s so wrong!!!
mmmmm would seriously think about it, although not sure there will be anymore spanish players, all different nationalities so far…….
pfff, of course there will be more spainards ::crossesfingures:: they are by far the sexiest. wonder if we’ll have an american. hmmmm, who would i pick from the us…terminator charlie!!
hmm, i guess i’ll have to wait til the end of the week. IF there are no more spainards, i may have to vote xabi in. although i love the italians, spain has my whole heart
Can't argue with that
Senora Ramos, this is Molly’s brother. I am a huge Milan fan and I am sure you are a very beautiful, smart woman. I can tell you that you will not regret voting for Marco. He is a great footballer and from what my sister says his is very attractive. He is the future of Italia and you will have a part of making him so. He will be very happy you voted for him.
next thing you know marco hisself will be on here asking me to vote for him
michael, molly, mrsnesta and juventina – i am almost convinced. he's such a sexy man. he's a rather good footballer. he loves his mama and grandmother. sigh. if only he had a bubba and played for madrid. i'm being swayed.
Hey you never know, he may come on and sway you LOL!!! But do you need my bf to come on and sway your vote the rest of the way??? He is Irish and he’s very smooth LOL LOL LOL!!!
oh, irish!! you lucky, lucky girl!! love the accent!!!!!! but for your sake (and iker love), that’s not needed. i just really need to see if there will be another spainard. if there is, i will vote for marco!
Kk I can deal with that
!!! Thank you! Aw I am very lucky, thanks 
!!
Thanks
Ummm don't know if I can go against my Iker
…but I don't think he is going to be in it anyways so…I don't know 
But if it is anyone else…you got my vote for whoever you want!!!!
!!!
well seeing as I have no thing for Iker if he is paired against Ramos, I will vote for him in your honour. Because i’m not biased on either side. That would actually be hard for me to choose because it wouldn’t make a difference LOL
if Iker and Sergio were paired together…that would be sacrilege!
These might help you decide (if they work)
http://i879.photobucket.com/albums/ab356/MrsNesta/marcouz4.jpg
http://i879.photobucket.com/albums/ab356/MrsNesta/97.jpg
This one cos it makes me laugh, and love the idea of him and Canna on a night out LOLOL
http://i879.photobucket.com/albums/ab356/MrsNesta/capri4.jpg
it's like he's begging me in the first pic. noooooooooo~
He's thanking you from his heart, and he really loves his mum and recently threw a birthday party for her
awww, you guys are cheating
Why did you have to post that one of the old man stripping again now I am going to be going back to it laughing all night
!!!!
any video of him speaking english. b/c shabi speaks some sexy english
Umm we haven't found on of him speaking english yet but I have a great one of him running around with his shirt off
!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GqCxfNA4igY
Post it!
Here's another more photo you two will like
http://i784.photobucket.com/albums/yy128/juventin…
LOL i love the innocence in his face there:)
He is saying “please vote for me Senora Ramos or I will cry”
oh molly…that's not fair!
"Pretty,pretty please"
!!!
Here is some more videos that I love of Marco….
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dbNohzN6Lng
And he has a good sense of humour
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZD0FcxjYnyE
If our choice is indicitive to
our personality type then my choice is simple.
Marco!!!
What does that say about me? Hmmm??
that you have good taste
LOL
This was an easy one. Guess I fall under the pure evil category.
With all the STD stuff I probably wouldn't touch him, but I'd very much like to film him in the shower…
Xabi's a class act though. I loved that he showed up to watch Liverpool.
Xabi for sure.
<3
I usually go for the bad boy and Marco is damn HOT. b
But how can I not votefor Xabi?? He's Spanish and plays for Real and used to pay for Liverpool and is the classiest hombre in the buisness. I just HAVE to vote for him!
XABI XABI XABI!!! Te amo <3
I think kickette is showing favouritism again
!!!!!
ME TOO!!! Marco does not have an STD lets get this straight! He HAD one. He is senza STD!! UGH I hate Belen! Maybe if she knew how to only screw one guy at a time we would not be having this problem! OK rant over.
LOL
The STD did not have to be brought up…it was years ago and he got it taken care of and he did his punishment!!!!!
Agree – Marco is kind and caring (he gives poepe lifts in his carlol) and was hurt by that Belen. So everyone should give the guy a break on this
* car lol not carlol (sorry to confuse) lol
WHY, KICKETTE, WHY MUST YOU DO THIS TO ME.
Xabi v Marco?
ARGH.
Agreed.
It’s a cruel, cruel world.
OH.MY.GOD NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME KICKETTE I CAN'T PICK BETWEEN XABI AND MARCO!!!
I picked Marco because he is my Italian love.
And by the way why does Marco have devil horns lol lol?
because Marco's a bad boy
Molly you are so simple…what do devil horn mean???
I not simple Michael!!! I just miss things sometimes!!! You know that!! Meanie!! But thank you for voting for Marco!
*I am not
Hehehe
LOL I know I made myself sound simple LOL!!
*SCREAMS* OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG IF MARCO'S THE DEVIL HOW DO I GET TO HELL!?!?!?
MARCO FOR THE WIN!!!!! TI AMO MARCO TI AMO!!!
Omg that was quick LOL