October 30th, 2009
The Re-Hash: Trick or Treat, Baller Edition
Yup, that’s right. It’s the same post we put up last year for Halloween. We’re just that professional, prepared and well-sorted. But also, last year’s Hallo post was so much fun.
And, there are only so many slutty costumes and innuendo we can spout. We topped out somewhere in-between the fireman hose jokes and the Elite XI.
We’re hoping we’ll have lots of footballers at fancy dress party pics to post on Monday, but in the meantime, take a walk with us down memory lane – if you were with us last year, have your answers changed? If you’re new to the site, by all means make your thoughts known.
Random: have you got your costume yet?
Happy Halloween, Kickettes!
Since we’ve yet to decide on our costume for this evening’s festivities, we’re going to procrastinate and play our favourite Halloween-themed baller game, Trick or Treat, ‘Baller Edition.
Btw: can anyone shed some light on why every option for women is prefaced by skank? ie, slutty- football- supporter- chick, slutty- witch, slutty- cheerleader, slutty- zombie, etc?
Anyhoo, the rules are simple, but strict:
Two ballers knock on your door dressed in their best costume. You have to decide which one of them gets a trick, and which one gets a treat. Who are you giving the best candy to and who gets a blast of sneezing powder? Someone has to go home with empty pockets, and it’s up to you.
There goes the doorbell! Throw on a skanky-nurse costume and click on through.
First up – Fernando Torres: an ambitious new fireman, fresh out of training. Has yards of extra hose;
vs Xabi Alonso, the confident, transatlantic pilot with a swagger that can only come from hooking up with half of the stewardesses on the last NY-London flight in.
Next, Iker Casillas, a bristling, brooding Zorro. He has a mask and dresses in black. ‘Nuff said;
vs Doctor Santa Cruz, known for his gentle bedside manner. Ready, as always, to give a full and comprehensive physical.
Francesco Totti: a swarthy cowboy kitted out in requisite leather chaps and a large lasso;
vs Sylvain Distin – an experienced police officer who isn’t afraid to use his truncheon if necessary;
(wow, this really is getting extremely cheesy and a tad playgirl catalogue, but we’ve started so we might as well finish)
Finally, Yoann Gourcuff, the gladiator. Fights lions with his bare hands and feels no need to ever wear a shirt;
vs Owen Hargreaves as a hardworking mechanic. Good with grease and not afraid to get dirty.
Who wins your Trick or Treat-Off this All Hallow’s Eve?