May 31st, 2012

The Sizzle Query: England’s Spare Shotstoppers

Pundits say that Joe Hart is the best goalkeeper England have produced since Peter Shilton. He’s certainly the hottest. But it’s going to take more than one pretty to prevent England suffering an ignominious exit from a major competition (again).

Naturally, we need to find out whose operating in the Furry Smurf’s foine shadow. And more importantly, which one do you fancy?

Rob Green, 32 y/o, Bearer of Quiff
All England ‘keepers blot their copybook at some point or another and we still haven’t totally forgiven Rob Green and his disappointingly flat hair for remaining coy whilst watching the ball sail over the line in England’s opening game vs. USA in the 2010 World Cup.

With the help of some Hair Goo, his neat little ‘do has found it’s way back into the England squad – and has simultaneously revealed a secret cutie beneath the surface. Green’s experienced, good with his hands and able to put his mistakes behind him even if the rest of the country can’t.

Who knew a hairdo could have such an impact on a guy’s prospects?

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Jack Butland, 19 y/o, Thrusting Young Buck
After suffering the most unfortunate accident to befall an England footballer since David James wore that white suit to the FA Cup Final, John Ruddy was ruled out of the squad. To replace him, Roy Hodgson ventured down to League 2 and came up with Cheltenham Town’s Jack Butland.

He’s young enough to know no fear. And he’s probably going to spend most of the tournament on the bench, so he’ll have plenty of excess energy to work off.

Was Hodgson’s trip worth it? For us, if they’re good enough, they’re old enough. Jackie boy definitely looks good enough.

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Do you have a preference  between the old and the new, Kickettes? Or are you happy to give both an opportunity to show you what they can do?

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6 Responses to “The Sizzle Query: England’s Spare Shotstoppers”

  1. mancare says:

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  2. Nicola says:

    Robert Green is sex-on-legs.

  3. FloraJane says:

    Robert Green, definitely. He's had some good performances along with the bad. And, for me, he's much more shaggable than the others. He has that rugged, masculine look about him. Yum.

  4. MsMe says:

    Well both are ok, but Green is more age-appropriate for me. 19 is too young…

  5. blake2108 says:

    Jack Butland is my best friend's flatmate's boyfriend, so that basically makes us mutual friends!

    He's a great prospect and I've heard he's a lovely guy to boot. Definitely the right choice with Ruddy injured.

    I still haven't forgiven Green for USAgate.

  6. liz1 says:

    im sorry but there's something weird going on in the nose department in the second pick… i just can't tell what exactly it is. it's just off.