May 31st, 2011
The Sizzle Query: Public Displays of Affection
Image Credit: BIG Pictures/KEYSTONE Press.
Normally, when the hearts and hormones of a footballer and a lady align, they can’t help keeping their heavy-petting paws off each other. Unfortunately/fortunately for the general viewing public, this is sometimes at the expense of any number of recently-consumed catered meals.
Because we field questions about the topic all the time, it’s time we give our stance on the matter: certain activities, such as lovey dovey thumb wrestling, are okay in moderation. Tonsil inspection by tongue, however, is a whole ‘nother story that runs the fine risk of waking the sleeping giant in our tummies that is last night’s tequila. Copping a quick grope of your wife’s perky bum? Hey – if she’s still got it then by all means. On the other hand, smooching to sway public opinion is an iffy scenario even for the sappiest of Sugar Plum fairies.
Follow the spotted-with-toxic-materials pink brick ‘READ MORE’ for our full analysis on this issue, Kickettes. Also, keep in mind that the thoughts/views expressed here do not relate to our sentiments on bromantic pairings, because by and large, we approve of manlove.
Just as long as 1/2 of the pair is good looking. That’s a make or break, obvi.
Carry on, Mr & Mrs Kaka. Hand holding is a-okay for all of eternity in our books.
Hand and face holding mid-smooch/general public disruption due to whiplash = questionable. Doing said actions after the two of you were engaging in full-on gawking and groping while on stage= not acceptable.
The Gucci ball cap is easily detestable, but don’t let it confuse you, Kickettes. We feel as good as Irina Shayk’s ‘who farted?!’ face looks, which we’re fine with. And if you’re asking for our thoughts on Ms. Shayk picking (what seems to be) a front wedgie in front of her boyfriend’s baby? Meh, we’ll reserve our right to judge harshly for one activity we ain’t down with: her cigarette smoking (last photo in the slick sideshow).
Do you agree with our adoring admiration for certain kissing couples, or do you feel apathetic anguish towards fondling of any kind?