March 19th, 2012

The Sizzle Query: Shaggy Or Smooth?

Image: REUTERS/Ricardo Moraes.

Fabio Caballero (above, left) of Olimpia isn’t the only player with a happy trail (and bad underwear) on the pitch these days, Kickettes.

happy trail male footballer groomingWe’re prepared to forgive the latter, though, because by revealing his furry fortune finder, Caballero has kicked off another debate in our office about male grooming.

Is a¬†little map guiding a person on their journey to a footballer’s nethers helpfully hairy or scary? Or, would you rather lock all professional pets in the Kickette HQ loo until their bodily follicles have been spayed and neutered for good?

We know you have a serious interest in depilation after Leo Messi’s calves brought new meaning to the term smooth, but there’s breakaway support here for Joe ‘Furry Smurf’ Hart so this stand-off doesn’t look like it’s gonna get solved soon.

Do us a favour, Kickettes, and break the deadlock? The resulting sulks have been dreadful for our partially cheery demeanour.

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18 Responses to “The Sizzle Query: Shaggy Or Smooth?”

  1. IrishBlue says:

    What about the time Rooney shaved his chest hair into a '19' last season…

  2. Josh Tarrant says:

    Never smooth,

    Never smooth.

    It just looks wrong. Just a bit of trimming is all that is needed.

  3. chay says:

    I used to not be able to appreciate hairy chests until I dated someone who had one. Now I can fully appreciate them. What I cannot appreciate is hairy backs. That to me seems like one step away from a Neanderthal.

    And I agree with what was said above: Happy trails lead to happy things! :-D

  4. Kai says:

    I completely agree with happy trails. After all they lead to happy places. Now if there is chest hair that can be french braided or is waving in the wind and causing offside goals, then we have a problem.

  5. Dols says:

    I like Nando's smooth abs and I don't want to see him furry. Also StevieG and David's abs are HOT and SMOOTH
    But like other kicketts, I think Xabi and Lance look so delicious with their bits of hair.

    It all depends on who they are and how hairy it gets……

  6. Alicia says:

    I have to say the Happy Trail is extremely sexy to me.

  7. Mrs_Q_Borri says:

    Omg my friends and I debated on this topic a while ago!! LOL!!

    My conclusion: It depends on how you are, on some it looks super hot but in others it just not OK. I happen to like it on some fine specimen like Bocamuffin and Lance Parker just because they look manly and sexy with it. They can make it work it, adds up to the whole sex appeal. But on other is just a no-no!! -Like some mention before- Ryan Giggs no way in a million years!

    It also depends on the style of the man, some need it some just don't!! ;) Btw Does Yoann has some??? He gives this whole french poetic painter vibe -that is so sexy- and I kind of imagine him with some.. IMO! :)

  8. littlegreenpea says:

    It looks good on some, but not on others.

  9. Jayy says:

    A little bit of hair doesnt do any harm Kickette :) after all, beauties such as Xabi, Lance and Boca Muffin have it! And theyre mega sexy.
    However if it is a hairy chest like Giggs, then I'd be a bit creeped out.

  10. liz2 says:

    it all depends on the color of the hair and the tan of the abs:
    dark hair, pale=no bueno
    dark hair, tan=debateable
    light hair, pale=ok
    light hair, tan=muy bien

  11. Liza says:

    His is not bad, it is only scary if they look like a bear then it is a little bit of this :o but quickly turns into ^_^

  12. IrishBlue says:

    Eh hello, number one on the Finest 5 pretty much answers that question!

    Lance Parker: Hairy manly perfection.

    Obviously there has to be a limit though, I don't really dig the werewolf look either.

    Ryan 'the rug' Giggs: No thanks.

    Oh how hard it is to please a woman!

    • Kait says:

      Oh I agree. Esteban Granero of Madrid has a bit of a hairy chest too, or he did last time he took his shirt off. Dang base layers, but it's the perfect amount. But if it looks they are being hugged by a bear, or growing squirrels out of their body. . .well that's not good.

    • Jayy says:

      Haha I posted my comment and then saw yours! your 100% right on the Giggs analysis :P

      • Jenni says:

        Yep – I was going for a 'Carpet Man' comment too (my best friend and I have called Giggs that since he decided to take his shirt off after scoring against Arsenal in '99). Generally, I like people to leave their body hair to its own devices, but there is a limit.