February 18th, 2011

The Ugh Files: Aurora Oliveira, Escort To the Italian Footy Stars?

Serie A and Italian National Team 'ballers call girl

Aurora’s other interests include charity work, knitting and lawn green bowls. Images: SoloGossip.it; Telegraphbuzz.com.

Two weeks ago, sex solicitor Aurora Oliveira was a guest on Italian TV show, “Chiambretti Night”, to tell all about the prostitution tactics she used to romp with several unidentified Serie A footballers and Italian NT players. Her scandalicious gossip was so great, that the show invited her back just days later to facilitate a further ratings rise.

Although Ms. Oliveira made some potentially damning allegations against a bunch of ‘ballers – some of which warranted threatening calls from her clients should she dare name and shame them during her second interview – we’ve been abnormally sluggish when disseminating this ‘news’ to you folks.

Turns out, we’ve even lost the vigor needed to regularly ransack the lifestyles of the rich and talented in a snarky, light-hearted manner.  With these ‘pay-for-play‘ rumours and other such infidelity issues among the footy elite becoming more regular, we’ve taken a step back, hoping our refusal to dignify will cause these stories to cease with immediate effect.

Clearly, it hasn’t worked.

So, with the ‘delusion of grandeur’ pills safely back in the locked medicine cabinet, all we have to offer by way of shoddy summary is the Kickette Richter Scale Magnitude rankings. Our unscientific system assigns a composite score for each of Aurora’s claims, calibrated by the measurable amount of public humiliation her paying customers would suffer plus a multiple of the number of visible injuries their partners would inflict should she ever release their names (or proof that validates her claims).

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Claim #1: Oliveira said she has slept with many Serie A players – even some from the [Italian] national team”.

Kickette Richter Scale Magnitude (0 – 10, with 10 decimating their manhood): 5.1 May cause damage to poorly constructed relationships in the short term. Only minor damage to better maintained unions anticipated.

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Claim #2: Many of her said trysts have often occurred “a day or so before big games”.

Kickette Richter Scale Magnitude: 3.2 Noticeable trembling of staff members patrolling hotels’ hallways. Rattling noises possible, but significant public damage unlikely because a majority of WAGs would remain firmly planted in their Italian marble hallways.

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Claim #3: She admitted that all of her conquests were with ‘ballers who were (and still are, for the time being) married with children“They have no remorse…sometimes they’ll speak to me about family arguments, others remain silent.”

Kickette Richter Scale Magnitude: 10.0 An explosion so epic, it’s never been registered.  We envision that the acrylic nail aftermath would be plenty biblical.

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Claim #4: More often than not, Oliveira said her paying customers prefer to receive “perverse performances” from her.

Kickette Richter Scale Magnitude:9.5. Guaranteed to thermonuke a marriage in a singular, mushroom-cloud combustion. Eye-watering public apologies would be unavoidable; this is the kind of blast that vaporizes credibility in an instant.  Worse still, the ballistic trajectory of PMS-induced aftershocks would wreak havoc on the division of assets portion of a couple’s divorce proceedings.

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Claim #5: How it all goes down, according to Aurora, is a three-step ordeal. First, she books the room, then pays for it.  Once the dirty deeds were allegedly finished, she’d push for a room refund from the footballer.

Kickette Richter Magnitude: 1.5. Generally not felt in one’s bank account, but mentally recorded by the wives’ and girlfriends for offensive detonation in future fights. Minor eardrum swelling, major ego bruising.

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Claim #6: When pressed for an explanation as to why footballers choose her over other, younger service girls, this ‘luxury escort’ (her words, not ours) cited her professional experience“. (Background: Ms. Oliveira is a retired porn star turned prostitute – with aspirations of forging a serious acting career)

Kickette Richter Magnitude: 2.2 Slightly disturbing, in that great belches of self-aggrandising smoke are likely to interfere with normal day to day activity. However, this will clear in time, leaving a vaguely unpleasant burning smell that can easily be dispersed with a can of air freshener.

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Claim #7: She’s also done phone sex and sent nudie snaps of herself via SMS.

Kickette Richter Magnitude: 4.0 A low level disturbance with far reaching tremors on the embarrassment sub-scale. Risk of emotional blackmail would be amplified for some months after the initial shocks had passed.

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46 Responses to “The Ugh Files: Aurora Oliveira, Escort To the Italian Footy Stars?”

  1. Sarah says:

    I would be ashamed to call this women my daughter, or to say that she is even related to me. She is a disgrace. An footballers need to be happy with their WAGs and stop cheating on them!!!

  2. Ira says:

    Why's everyone hating on her and not one of you saying anything about the supposed married men cheating on their families? Seriously she's a porn star/prostitute, going on TV talking about these famous men is no big deal for her. And she also has a right to do so.
    The ones we should be disgusted with are the footballers, is it only me who thinks that?

  3. ashmenon says:

    Hmm…maybe I'm just looking at it from a guy's perspective, but why are we blaming her? HE got married, had children, and still couldn't keep it in his pants. She's working her job and climbing the fame ladder using whatever hung rung she can find. It's not like she forced them to have sex, right?

    Although, seriously, honey, inner-sideboob is never hot. It just looks like you had a wardrobe malfunction.

  4. GracieB says:

    that's just nasty coochie!

  5. icecreamsherbert says:

    People are saying that there's a double standard for women whoring around and just by reading most of these comments, we're all upholding that double standard. Most of these comments are condemnation on the icky hooker, but hardly any about the man-whores that pay her for her "services". Looks like the guys sought her out and not the other way around. Yeah, she doesn't have any class, but does the guys that pay her have class too? I think not. Just because footballers have money and flaunt them around doesn't mean that they have class. I'm disgusted with people like her and guys that cheat and hire hookers.

  6. xoWinnie says:

    Sleeping Beauty's name was Aurora too…i wonder if she was a whore…

  7. mochara says:

    Ewewewewewewew I've now seen it all

  8. Jules says:

    Looking at her makes me fell physically sick.

  9. jelly says:

    I'm always conflicted with these situations. This woman is a major b because as a professional, I don't think she should ever be kissing or telling. She's doing this all for the fame but guys pay her to keep quiet. I'm not saying what she does is right but I don't want to get into this whole business because it is an occupation. But whilst she is a b, all the guys that go to her are major bs too. They have families they should remain committed to, its what they agreed when they married. Why must guys do this? Why must these girls do this?

  10. Zahara says:

    what a little ho she is…jeez loiuse she needs to get a life

  11. Amandinha says:

    i just barfed. Partly because i'm pissed drunk, partly because i can almost see her tities. ugh.

  12. Kim says:

    Everytime I see a story like this I am first sad and than disgusted. What happened to class? Do woman like Ms. Oliveira and others like her realize that no one will respect them ever because they first don't respect themselves. They care more for a fame (who wants fame when everyone knows your a prostitute) that boogles my mind but to show people that hey I had sex with your man while your at home supporting him and raising his children. :(

    It makes me mad that the men who have girlfriends and wives are sleeping with women knowing they could get an STD. I mean its disgusting that they would go and pay for sex when they have someone in their life and dont get me started on the married men with children but shit I know some of them get STDs and than they probably give them to their wives & girlfriends. Its just gross. I also agree with another person who said the men should be exposed because I want to know who these slimy men are.

  13. C16 says:

    Ew! Ms. Oliveira is a retired porn star turned prostitute – with aspirations of forging a serious acting career. That says it all. Just ew!

  14. IrishBlue says:

    Good grief woman put them away before someone loses an eye.

  15. @mezz98 says:

    Yeah…I got nuthin.

  16. MadridistaJenn says:

    I had no idea its become a badge of honor for prostitutes to parade around on telly and talk about the married famous men they've slept with.
    While I've invested time and money into education and trying to be a respectable human being, she's bought a set of boobs, profited greatly by laying on her back (and various positions) and is gaining notoriety by doing a promotional tour of her sexcapdes. What the hell!?! This is a cruel world.

  17. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Naughty W Fun II, Linda Fan. Linda Fan said: The Ugh Files: Aurora Oliveira, Escort To the Italian Football Stars? http://bit.ly/fpMiyE [...]

  18. annie says:

    what the fuc…..
    i always laugh when things like that happen!
    she s not even prety.

  19. chicagambeta says:

    Because most of them don't have an ounce of class in them either. Hurts to admit, but true and we all know it. In fact, my favourite players are the least classy ones. Classy football players is an oxymoron if ever there was one. We can probably count them on one hand (Kaka and Xabi Alonso being two of them).

    So, unclassy players get with unclassy hookers = Birds of a feather flock together (or should I say fu*k).

  20. D0li says:

    Although I find this article very amusing and think it is completely horrible that these men would risk their careers and families over a one night stand she is putting a bad stereotype on prostitues. Unlike the one's we see in the media many prostitutes are under age girls or women who have been trafficked and forced into the profession.

    People like this disgust me because they make those we are not familiar view these women as over paid slutz. I may be over viewing this seeing as I am a sociology major but this is just desturbing. How can she sit there with everyone watching her and say yes I had sex with all those men. It might be a double standard because she might see herself as taking control of her sexuality and doing what men do all the time but the difference here is that she is getting paid, discussing her sex life on national television, and sleeping with someone who is married with children. I think the men should be exposed (especially since they threatened her) so we all know what slime they are!

    • D0li says:

      sorry for any spelling errors.. my cell phone's autospell is very off..

      • Leya_S says:

        I've recently been on a documentary kick, and I watched a few about prostitutes and illegal sex trafficking. In particular, I watched "Very Young Girls" which was created by an ex-prostitute from the UK who got out of the life, as its called, and started a shelter/home/non-profit called GEMS (Girls Educational and Mentoring Services) in Harlem, NYC for young girls trying to get out of prostitution. All of them were forced into it, and getting out is almost as difficult as trying to get out of a gang.
        So like when these women parade around on TV talking about famous men they've slept with I think, "There are women and girls worldwide who are literally dying to get out of prostitution and you're up there glamorizing it!"

        • D0li says:

          yes agree! There are girls who think they will get alot of money and fame by sleeping with someone famous and/or making a sex tape. It's a shame having a brain is no longer valuable in our society. I think women like this (and many others) should not be allowed in public. It is awful that we allow them to have attention but at the same time the men who cheat on their wives should be known for the scum that they are.

          It amazes me that these players have so much money that they can spend $2,000 + on one prostitute for one night and I think she spent multiple times with a guy; I don't know Italian but I'm assuming. We can sit here and believe that these men are rich, attractive and famous which means women are throwing themselves at them for free but I think they pay for the privacy. I'm worried about her safety though if she's getting warnings.

  21. Alexandria Samuel says:

    I'd call her a Barbie doll, but I wouldn't want to offend Barbie. Ah well, it's been typed now.

  22. I'm so sick of these kiss-and-tell girls. Whatever happened to being discreet and just making that money. Can someone please write a how-to guide for these brazen hussies!

  23. Rossanera says:

    Alessandro Del Piero better not be among her clientele. I'm going to go forget I read this now and continue to (blindly) love my boys. AHHH. TRAUMATIZED.

  24. Cara says:

    The word "Class" has obviously been left out of this womans personal dictionary. Someone needs to update it for her!

  25. Lily says:

    The part that baffles me the most is not that successful players with a family are banging these things because that’s not even shocking anymore, but that girls like her are okay with going on TV and saying “I’m a prostitute!” like it’s a normal, respectful profession.

    They have absolutely no pride or dignity and I wonder how they can look at their parents in the eye.

  26. Bee says:

    Being a prostitute is kinda like having a job (albeit not-a-very-good-one), right? Last time I checked, they get paid for it. So I expect at least some work ethic. (But I guess I was being silly to expect that from a porn star turned prostitute) Why would they want to scar the whole world by telling us stuff like that?

    It's not like they give out free sex like I give out candy bars on Halloween, right? Cause then, they can tell the world and more men (possibly 'ballers) will come running at them.

  27. Alia says:

    EW. that is all

  28. beri says:

    Here we go again…another piece of trash trying to get her 15 minutes by telling how she hoes around …sorry I mean sleeps around for money! I'm sick of these girls…she wants attention and she is getting it!

  29. chay says:

    i don't mean to offend anyone, but apparently what i've heard from lots of sources, italian men are known to sleep around, even if they are married. So there's no shock there. However, I find it sad, though, that she feels the need to flaunt all the famous 'ballers she's been with because she knows no other way of getting attention. Shows how much depth she has (i.e., as much as a toddler's wading pool).

    And unfortunately, as long as people love scandal and dirt (and they always will), she will be in the limelight

    • chicagambeta says:

      I agree people always love the dirt, that's probably why most of us clicked on the article! Yeah heard that as well about Italian men. Also Argentine men. And Japanese men (wives accept that it's par for the course, especially when men are "tanshin funin" – husband transferred abroad alone). In fact, come to think of it, I don't think we can focus on just a few countries, don't ALL men do this? I mean look at the English players and their shenanigans??

      If somebody knows of a nation of men who are NOT prone to cheating please post and let us know. Or are you all going to say "hot macho men are biologically programmed to spread their seeds around, no matter what country they are from"? And yes, I know that women cheat as well, but I think we can safely agree that we are not known for exchanging bodily fluids with male hoes. Hell, maybe we should actually start doing that. Because I see no end to this, and I'm getting a bit bored and jaded by it all. If anyone knows of a website where I can find hot young (preferably below 25) studs please let me know.

      Sorry about the negativity.

      • @DebStimson says:

        For some reason, much of society doesn't seem to hold men responsible for their inability to control their sexual urges. Notice how it's usually the "other woman" that is to blame for the men cheating and the man receives a slap on the hand from society but that's about it and that's in the more "progressive" countries. Meanwhile in other countries, women are killed if they are raped.

        So yeah…I don't know of too many nations where men don't cheat. Until they are held responsible, it won't change.

      • chay says:

        I actually heard an NPR segment about how the men in Russia are practically encouraged to cheat on their wives and it is not a bad thing.

        What gets me is that both men and women cheat, but for some reason it's "okay" for men to cheat. As usual, they're just being "normal," whatever the hell that means. Women, on the other hand, are branded with a scarlett letter of sorts. Of course, i discourage cheating of any sort. Being sexually healthy and active, on the other hand, is a whole other thing. And therefore, i pretty much ignore those people who scorn and lay double standards on women.

        Anyhow, i'm totally going off on a tangent, sorry! :-)

        What gets me is Aurora's almost boasting and emphasizing that these footballers were/are all married. I've done enough research to know that a lot of men cheat on their wives with women who are not even necessarily that much hotter than them. She doesn't seem to realise that they will cheat with anyone.

  30. Lotte (Zlatanista) says:

    I just vomited in my mouth a little.

  31. SoccerrLoverrr says:

    Good luck with the acting career! ur gunna need all the luck u can get!

  32. mamaly says:

    She has aspirations of forging a serious acting career.
    And the Oscar goes to….

  33. Leya_S says:

    "Ms. Oliveira is a retired porn star turned prostitute – with aspirations of forging a serious acting career"

    BAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! Pretty much every word in this sentence is seriously HILARIOUS.
    Btw, I know that prostitutes don't have to be hot (Hugh Grant showed us that) but I think about ballers' beautiful wives and girlfriends and I'm just like "Are ridiculous sexual fetishes and STDs REALLY worth cheating with some nast-tastic prosti? Let's be serious…"
    When I opened this page, upon seeing her picture and without reading anything, my first response was immediately "Eww." And that was out loud.

    • lisette05 says:

      (1) Yeah, I snorted my coffee through my nose when I read that. It really does say everything, doesn't it?

      (2) From what I've seen (I'm an armchair psychologist with literally YEARS of experience) cheating married men seem to go for less hot versions of their wives. They have their type, and they don't have to look at her for the rest of their lives, so why not go for the super slutty women they don't even have to pretend to respect?

      Plus, with hookers, they won't fall in love with you and run crying to the wife. They – usually – won't wreck either their own careers by going to the press and scaring off all their clients. (I suspect this one is reaching the end of her careers and is trying to cash in, hence the fact that she's so…well… your know…No real pro would be this blatant or stupid.)

      • lisette05 says:

        Continued:

        A lot of men see sex as an entitlement – if their beautiful wife won't do X, Y and/or Z, they will use that and a "need" for variety as an excuse to go elsewhere. (A man once said to me: "Imagine the most beautiful and sexual woman in the world. By her side will be a man who is bored out of his brains from having sex with her" Ugh.)

        Frankly, considering all this and how many offers footballers get, I'm surprised that more don't ho around and that so few get caught.

        • Leya_S says:

          Jesus Navas, that's so annoying. I may be just naive, as I am a virgin (and proud of it), but really, if your wife is boring you, HAVE A CONVERSATION ABOUT IT. Go to couples counseling. Buy some dirty DVDs and try some new positions with her. There are SO many ways to fix it. Don't cheat.