October 30th, 2008
The TTO: Mario Gomez v Thierry Henry
Hello again, lovely leg-lubbers, and welcome to another session of the Thursday Thigh Off.
First timers, make yourselves comfortable and feel free to grab refreshments – we’ve got Thigh-ve Alive Citrus Blend!
There’s no doubt that, for many of you, this time of year is a hard one. You wake up to frost on the grass. You reluctantly fish your bearskin parka out of the closet. You sleep wearing scratchy wool socks that hide your perfect pedicure. Random peasants sneeze on you while you are in commute.
We’re here to help. We find that good moisturizers and heavy doses of pun (accompanied by frequent friskings of footie flesh) are KEY.
Today we plan on worshiping at the Church of Thighentology. Won’t you join us? Click through and let’s cleanse those thightans!
In the blue corner, we have ONTD Football’s newest sigh-inducer, Mario “Best of Both Worlds” Gómez. Surprisingly, he was not fathered by Crispin Glover. Born to a Spanish padre and a German mutter just twenty-three years ago, Mario is, well, as the nickname suggests.
Question: What does Spanish plus German equal, anyway? Sperman?
A striker for the German national team and for VfB Stuttgart, Mario has a high goal-scoring ratio and has ma- Oh. Oh, sorry. We’ll get back on topic now. These are primo thighs, people, the stuff of fantasies.
In the red corner, Thierry Henry.
Thigherry Henry would be way too easy, wouldn’t it?
Around our neck of the woods, we call him Titty. You know his story. ‘ee eez Fransh, he is the undisputed King of Incredible Baby Photos, and he’s an ex-Gunner/current Barça man. Tall. Long legs. Nice thighs. Very nice.
Believe it or not, we actually have a lot in common with Monsieur Titty:
We both really, really like fondling barely legal Bojan Krkic; We both love a good Gigi snog and; Yes, duh, we both love sending the Bulge-Watch Radar into a frenzy.
Happy voting. Good luck!
Congratulations to last week’s winner, Zlatan Ibrahimovic. Lord knows, he needs an ego boost. Congrats Big Z!
The TTO is brought to you by the lovelettes at ONTD Football.