May 1st, 2008

The TTO: Micah Richards v Paolo Maldini

Soz for the lateness of the TTO today, Kickettes. We promise never to keep you in anticipation of thighs again and accept it truly is unacceptable to have to wait more than 2 minutes after the stroke of midnight on a Thursday before quadly goodness is posted in rapid fire fashion.

Let’s get to the goods, shall we?


First, we have the tartan/high zip-loving Micah Richards of Manchester City. Regardless of his fashion choices, there is absolutely no denying the bod. He has more abs than anyone we know and he is terribly thightastic.  He became the youngest defender to play for England in November 2006, when he was 18 years old.


Also for your consideration is Paolo Maldini, who plays for AC Milan and has several things working for him: the eyes, the extreme amounts of cash he has amassed over the years, and quite obviously, his physical prowess.  Mr. Maldini is one of the elder statesman on the field – he’s played in eight Champions League finals.

It’s young, fresh legs full of stamina against highly experienced, finely honed ones. Who gets your vote this week?

Congratulations to the lovely Xabi Alonso for his victory over Joe Cole in last week’s Thigh Off. Sorry Joey, but you’re going to Moscow so it all evens out.


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92 Responses to “The TTO: Micah Richards v Paolo Maldini”

  1. Helena says:


    There is no competition!!

  2. Kandi Kane says:

    Paolo Maldini, he’s hot all over and Italian.  The perfect combination.

  3. MrsMichaelOwen says:

    Paolo huummmm oh soz michael getting carries away those thighs *snap out of it* ok no can do

  4. kaya says:

    Paolo Thighdini

  5. no worries says:

    i had a good laugh about it.

    security words: bad joke raspberry

  6. Genevieve says:


    Legendary man, legendary thighs

    And have we mentioned he’s Italian???


  7. Zatil says:

    it HAS to be Maldini!! raspberry

  8. marmitey says:

    10/10 kickette for the superb pics… i thoroughly enjoying studying them both, multiple times. big surprise

    i have to go with MICAH – he is just pure muscle, and those thighs, wow! phooooaaaw.

    great TTO this week. cheese

    sorry to the ‘pool fan for the CL exit.


  9. Johnna says:

    No question; Paolo Maldini.

  10. Gigi Neville-Brown says:

    Signora M, I was so overcome with <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="red face" style="border:0;" />  dirty thoughts of your husband due to the pic that you teased us all with, that I closed my browser by mistake.  You are one lucky woman, and in case it is still a question as to who wins it for me, it is Paolo.  Damn!!!!  <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="kiss" style="border:0;" />

    Micah is young, sweet and talented, but Paolo is well, Paolo.

    ms. ex-D, I am still weighing my options for a third husband, but seeing as the choices are sooo vast and varied, I am “test” driving a few until I find the right make, model and size.  <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="smile" style="border:0;" />

  11. bangonthemoney says:

    Fresh meat over old stringy meat.

  12. Paris says:

    Paolo Maldini Of course

  13. Sarah x says:

    Paolo Maldini Gets My Vote This Week (Y)

  14. Becca x says:

    It Has To Be Maldini.

    How Could You Do That To Joe? [Dont Worry Im Always Here For You Joey!]

  15. klyn312 says:

    oh NOOO! I am just sooo late on this one- oh kickette, this is such a good one!!! They are both so perfectly thightastic! Since I can not make up my mind on pure thi-age alone, I must commit the ultimate sin and resort to the shirt color…  In which case- we all know I would NEVER give my vote to a city player! <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="tongue laugh" style="border:0;" />

    Signora Maldini – you are one lucky lady!

  16. Moongirl (Mrs Sender says:

    Hi MrsX – hope ur feelin a little better.

    Ignore the Chelsea gloaters – theyre just getting over excited cos theyve never had a chance to win anything this big before. Liverpool however are much more experienced in these matters and would have behaved with more dignity!

    I don’t supose its any consolation but i did think after Skrtel went off Xabi was definitely the hottest bod out there – he does wet so well!!!  <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="smile" style="border:0;" />

    Sorry to deviate from the thighs BTW.

  17. MrsXabiAlonso says:

    “I guess Xabi needs to win something.
    Moscow, here I come!“

    A little un called for. There are still many Liverpool ladies on here that are upset by the defeat. A thigh thread is somewhere we come to get away from it all, not have it rubbed in our faces.

    Also Chelsea havn’t actually won anything this season either. So don’t speak too soon.

    And thirdly, what the hell you doing picking on Xabi?? Leave my man alone. If you aren’t commenting on his perfect male form, then keep quiet.

  18. mrsredknapp says:

    another mrs….! Have to go with maldini definitely, I like Italians!!

  19. Signora Maldini says:

    I am glad you ladies enjoyed the photo. And I can’t say I blame you for thinking naughty thoughts, you are all only human and he god like his beauty.

    Days like this – and ahem..nights like last night -  remind what a charmed life I lead. *blissful sigh*

  20. Mrs.Mexes says:

    Hellooooo Kickettes! Thank you thank you THANK YOU for putting up the glory that is Maldini. As Brandy and LucyLu said, Italian thighs trump all!!! wahooo!

    PS- is there any word on the H.O.F or the Finest Five update??

  21. Bella says:

    Signora Maldini, thank you SO much for the photo. That was EXACTLY what I was envisioning when I said “I’m in” wink ! Sigh.

    Ms.exD, I am SO confused. Did I miss from whom you are ex or D who? Tell all please. (Sorry if that makes it twice because I couldn’t find the deets).

  22. FootballerChick43 - says:

    Paolo! Deffo.
    I guess Xabi needs to win something.
    Moscow, here I come!

    Yes, I just revealed part of my true name. Oh dear. But.. its much easier than looking for just FC43 all the time.

  23. Gigi Neville-Brown says:

    Dear Aoife, first of all, take something for the pounding headache that you are sure to have, drink loads of water, a bit of caffeine, have a bit of something sweet(such as a soda, with sugar, since alcohol is a sugar), maybe a “hair of the dog”, or two and eating somethin spicy always helps me.  Cover your eyes with a damp cloth, plug in the ipod and try and sleep.  And remember, drink loads of water.  In the future, try and take a charcoal cap or two when you get home.  Usually seems to help me.  Good luck!

    Have a blast in the UK!

  24. HoneyBee says:

    Paolo Maldini of course wins this.HE IS SO HOT.But girls I warn you-keep your hands of him(and your tongs) because my mother has been adoring him for years.Even I can only admire from far far away.Damn it.

  25. dani,,PremierLeagueQ says:

    MALDINI omg
    but they both are great :D

    and finally the tto has appeared
    well done Xabi x and you MrsX

    oo finest 5 is updated todayy x

  26. Riise's girl says:

    PAOLO MALDINI no contest!!!!!

    Oh and I so agree with u MrsXabiAlonso, it was nice to see a bit of the santa cruz!!!! Yum

  27. c9 says:

    Shell- sure I share, you may have a lick of the right thigh ONLY, BUT THAT’S IT ! I am partial to the left and entitled to the rest of his body as well. <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" /> <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" />

  28. MrsXabiAlonso says:

    Paolo Maldini!!!

    Nice to see a tiny glimmer of Roque though smile

  29. alexandra says:


  30. Shell says:


    I’m thinkin that Mr Maldini was a little bit greedy when God was sharing out the hotness! Is there anything about him that isn’t perfect??

    @c9-  can we please, please share- you lick the right thigh and i’ll have the left???

    Oh and THANK YOU for the photo Signora Malodini!
    *right-clicks and saves for future reference*

  31. sarabee says:


    It is a toughie tho, but no-one could beat the delectable Paolo.

    Mmmmmmmmm…. kiss

  32. SB (Mrs.MO) says:


    I’m kinda also a Chelsea supporter. If my MO score hat-trick and NUFC wins, I’ll be happy as hell of course. But if chelsea wins, not a bad thing!

  33. Anja (Miss Red) says:

    (and name)*

  34. SB (Mrs.MO) says:

    haha, so there’s been divorces here as well. May I ask who?

    In Mrs.ex-D’s case, i think annulment’ll do the business!

    @ Sarah, modus operandi! LOL. You do watch many crime shows <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" />

    I quite like my new name, it’s a nice tradition to take a husband’s name! I’m pretty sure (well never say never, right?) my marriage will last forever considering the fact that I first fell in love with 98’ at the age of 9   <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="wink" style="border:0;" />

  35. Anja (Miss Red) says:

    I was going to vote for Micah… But then, I saw Signora Maldini’s photo of Paolo… Oh, Mamma mia, che bello! Che caldo! Aiaiai, tu hai un uomo perfetto! OK, that’s all I can say in Italian for now, still learning.

    As for the names, I’m not married to anyone yet either… There are too many too hot ballers to give my heart (an name) to one only <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="raspberry" style="border:0;" /> And most of them are already taken anyway :D

  36. Pink Panther says:

    I’m going to have to say that based on the evidence, Micah wins this one.
    Sorry Paolo, but you totes have everything else.

  37. ms. ex-D says:

    Gigi Neville-Brown, hopefully, you will soon be able to test-drive a divorced hubby cool grin

  38. Avenath says:

    Deanna…thanks so much, luv…much needed comfort…*hugs you* too…

  39. Aoife says:

    Ooooooh Signor Maldini!!! I love him. Have a special place in my heart for the oul fella. My vote goes to the experience.

    Micah is tainted by Rosie Webster. The harlot.

    Oh, ladies. I’m suffering from over-consumption of alcohol last night and I have to fly to England this evening. Any hangover tips because I do not fancy being ill on the plane? :(

  40. Cesc's lil bird says:

    Oh my goodness! When i read the names i thought straight away of voting for Paolo but seriously i looked at the pictures and Micah’s thighs are rocking! I love AC Milan but this week i’m ignoring all bias in me and voting on thighs alone.

  41. Leilani says:


  42. MrsJamieRedknapp says:

    Finally……….  thighs

    Paolo wins this one.  Yum!

  43. Deanna says:

    Congrats to Xabi…that's one Liverpool-Chelsea match-up that went the way of the Reds…sigh..sorry, am still heartbroken
    Awww! I’m so sorry, dear. *hugs you*

    I was pretty much heartbroken when I saw the Liverpool boys faces after the game, especially Stevie and Carra comforting each other. But don’t worry, I’m sure they will bounce back much stronger next season.

  44. Rusty says:

    Could I make some requests?



    There’s been a minimum of posts in these veins, but it reminds me of another sports rivalry I’m involved in, and I don’t want to have to deal with that &*^% in two venues. I’m happy that Chelsea won and sad for the Liverpool fans that they lost, but I’d like to leave it at that.

    keyword: pattern84. I see a pattern emerging.


  45. Avenath says:

    Congrats to Xabi…that’s one Liverpool-Chelsea match-up that went the way of the Reds…sigh..sorry, am still heartbroken <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="downer" style="border:0;" />

    Anyway, this week’s TTO winner is definitely the legendary Paolo Maldini!!…what a player, what a man…

  46. xlxcx says:

    Paulo no doubt. Every time I see Micah I see the words “roast” flash before my eyes

  47. Rusty says:

    Mille grazie, Signora Maldini.

    Che caldo!

    Holy crap, he can make me speak Italian!

    (Dare I call myself Frau Ballack? Nah.)

  48. LoveLamps says:

    Ok I’ll vote again, but only if Frank makes the Finest Five this time around!  Maldini hands down.  Give us a contest Kickette!

    PS – you’ll note no Mrs. in my name.  When Frank and I wed (and yes we will wed my sisters in baller love), I will retain my maiden name.  I had to get it back once already and be damned if I’m changing it again for anyone – not even Frank!

  49. Signora Maldini says:

    This is a screen cap from a DVD on Milan winning the Champs League last year..

    I couldn’t resist posting it because frankly..well I think it will be self explanatory……

  50. Pavi says:

    Sorry that was supposed to be biased.

  51. Pavi says:

    I’m going with Paolo on this one because that second picture just did it for me…though I may be baised because he’s Italian.

    And of course it has nothing to do with that unfortunate jacket incident involving Micah. <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="wink" style="border:0;" />

  52. Dolce says:

    Maldini takes the crown for me..especially having just gotten back from a two-week calorie and booze-fest through Italy, listening to gorgeous men chat about god-knows-what. Therefore, I readily admit that I may be a little bias due to my recent exposure to the Italian male species.

  53. Emily says:

    To SB (Mrs. MO):

    I too love that adorable little pint-sized striker.  I have his England shirt from the 2006 World Cup side.  The first time I wore it was on my birthday, June 20th—yes, the day of the Sweden match when 4 minutes in, Michael effed up his knee.  And the damn tv network kept showing the replay of when he tore his ACL backwards and forwards and backwards and forwards.  I have bad knees too, so whenever I see someone do something painful to their knee, I swear I feel it in my own!  I was so upset that I’d jinxed him with my shirt, and my mates were all taking the piss out of me so much that I was in tears.

    I will not fight you for marital rights of Michael, but please make sure that he scores a hat-trick this Monday against Chelsuck.  Ensure that he’s properly (ahem) warmed up and stretched and ready to kick some serious Blues ass!!!  The reason I will not ask you to share Michael?  Because my heart belongs to a certain carpet-chested Welsh Wizard and always will (very odd, ‘cause I don’t normally like hairy men!).  Since I think I’m the only one who fancies the pants off of Giggsy here, I don’t feel I need to stake territorial claim on him with my screen name.  All the better for me…  tongue wink

    Security word: myself38.  At the end of the season, I hope to have Ryan all to myself for 38 straight days.  cheese

  54. Jen says:


    Eight days a week and twice on Sundays.

  55. Emily says:

    I was getting sad at work today, waiting for the thighs to appear.  All I can say is that they were worth waiting for!  Thanks, Kickette!

    Both pairs of thighs are very impressive.  This was a really tough choice for me.  A lot of my decision is based on the leg positions in the photos, and so my vote for the most impressive thighs in the most impressive camera angles goes to… Micah Richards!  (Plus, an English boy playing for an English team vs. an Italian boy playing for an Italian team?  Gonna go with the English boy every time… Sorry! <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="grin" style="border:0;" /> )

  56. alyx says:

    whoa maldini!!!
    this is not competition

  57. Deanna says:

    Ooh, gorgeous thighs!!

    It has to be Paolo ‘God’ Maldini for me! Micah is still young, I’m sure he can win it next time.

    And Xabi won!!! Yay!!! Like there was ever any doubt!

  58. CannaFan says:


    MMMMMaldini all the way.  The man is perfection personified.

  59. Chel.C. says:

    Maldini.  For some reason, that pic of Micah’s leg disgusts me rather than…well, you know.

    Plus, I love me some Italian Stallion. <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="wink" style="border:0;" />

  60. redLIGHT says:

    lol! hmmmmmm, if i understand -very well- what she is trying to say, the “D” should stand for divorce. and i’m no lawyer, but, she should probably _plead_ for an annulment given that the entire debacle took place when she drank too much red wine. she probably had an alcoholic blackout from that stuff. or was that too much sex on the beach… regardless, she probably would be ever so grateful if the situation were to be taken care of <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="smile" style="border:0;" />

  61. Signora Maldini says:

    I don’t have to actually point out that my vote goes to Paolo, do I? <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" />

  62. Signora Maldini says:

    OH MY GOD!

    OH MY GOD!

    OH MY GOD!


    Kickette you have made my *week* with this. You’d think I’d be over the fangirlish tendency to melt at the merest flash of skin, what with being married to the man and all but just…

    The pretty is too much to handle.

    He is a legend.

    In every way possible and I loff him madly.  And right now the thighs in question are in rehab – and no I was not responsible for the injury <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" /> – so I am spending much time kissing it better.

    I should get back to that….

    Security code is food59. I guess that means I should bring the whipped cream and chocolate sauce…

  63. Sarah says:

    Haha, Mrs. MO, sounds like modus operandi.  Or maybe I just watch too many crime shows…

    I used to refer to Cesc as my future husband…well okay, so I still do.  But I didn’t want to put it in my name because there are so many Cesc lovers out there now and I just don’t have the energy to fight them all off.

    As for the TTO: this is a very tough decision.  I like them both, but I think I’m going to vote for Micah, because he’ll probably lose anyways and I don’t want him to get crushed too badly.

  64. carly says:

    lol ms. ex-D …what does your D stand for?

  65. ms. ex-D says:

    if mrs. gigi neville could enter into polygamy -and love it, why can’t others rectify REGRETTABLE mistakes… if my memory isn’t completely shot, i think some people rushed into weddings in an alcohol induced stupor… red face

  66. SB (Mrs.MO) says:


  67. Kathy says:

    Micah isn’t bad, but Paolo is definitely the better man in this contest!

    And congrats to Xabi!

  68. It’s a really tough call but I’m choosing Maldini. Very impressive!

    SB: you can have Mrs. Owen….as long as it stands for Mrs. Michael Owen.

    The Owen of the Hargreaves variety is mine….all MINE!


  69. DiorHeels says:

    Micah wins! He’s got it all minus the fashion as you said Kickette! But seriously. What’s NOT to love about the big man?!

  70. carly says:

    c9, the documentary was on portuguese tv, unfortunately. I’m really surprised at the ukelele story! I had no idea.
    This is just to show that TTO has cultural pieces too wink

  71. freddiegirl says:

    I don’t have Mrs. in my name…but then, Freddiegirl…ie: Freddie’s Girl…sounds so much better than Mrs. Ljungberg.  And no matter who Freddie plays for, no matter what cute new younger baller comes along, I’ll always be Freddie’s girl…;) 
    Yeah, I’m loyal.

  72. c9 says:

    carly- Was the documentary on the Discovery channel or something? I would love to see it. Seeing that I’m not portuguese I’m not worried about being related to my Cris, except through marriage of course <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="tongue wink" style="border:0;" /> Yes there is a link between the ukulele and the portuguese inspiration it’s derived from.
    There are a lot of portuguese people here in Hawai’i, and they are kind of cute. Thank You carly for sharing that with me in the middle of TTTO <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="kiss" style="border:0;" />

  73. killing me, but not says:

    yeah, SB, everyone does seems to have Mrs

  74. tammyv says:

    I am with Rusty, if were anyone but Maldini or Lamps, you would win hands down Micah but it is Paolo, “I am better then you in every way” Maldini. 

    Seriously his thighs have been tested in every possible way:

    AC Milan

    Serie A
    Winner (7): 1988, 1992, 1993, 1994, 1996, 1999, 2004
    Runner-up (3): 1990, 1991, 2005

    Coppa Italia
    Winner (1): 2003
    Runner-up (2): 1990, 1998

    Supercoppa Italiana
    Winner (5): 1988, 1992, 1993, 1994, 2004
    Runner-up (3): 1996, 1999, 2003

    UEFA Champions League
    Winner (5): 1989, 1990, 1994, 2003, 2007
    Runner-up (3): 1993, 1995, 2005

    UEFA Super Cup
    Winner (5): 1989, 1990, 1994, 2003, 2007
    Runner-up (1): 1993

    Intercontinental Cup
    Winner (2): 1989, 1990
    Runner-up (3): 1993, 1994, 2003

    FIFA Club World Cup
    Winner (1): 2007

    FIFA World Cup:
    Runner-up: 1994
    Third place: 1990

    UEFA European Championship
    Runner-up: 2000

  75. SB says:

    Oh, and everyone seems to have Mrs… in their names. Can I have Michael Owen?  tongue wink . Or are there already many versions of Mrs.Owen?

  76. freddiegirl says:

    Micah does have nice thighs…but I’m going with Maldini.

  77. carly says:

    on a completely off-topic note,
    I saw a documentary the other day that reminded me of you. (Don’t be scared!) It was about portuguese immigrants from Madeira. Apparently there was a big migration to Hawaii both in the 18th and 19th century, to work on the sugar cane plantations.
    Some a few of Hawaii’s inhabitans today are portuguese descendants. So I’m not going to suggest that you and Cris are related because that would be gross (you are related but through marriage, of course) but there is a bigger connection Madeira-Hawaii than I imagined.
    In the documentary they even suggested that the ukelele was inspired by an instrument from Madeira, I thought that was a bit far-fetched.

    OK, sorry Kickettes. Back to thighs.

  78. brandy says:

    Gotta go with Paolo! Like LucyLu said, Italian thighs ALWAYS trump English thighs. It’s just the way of the world <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="smile" style="border:0;" />

  79. SB says:

    wow, that’s a tough choice. Micah has a nice thighs.

    But I’m gonna go with Paolo. (I don’t know why tbh)

  80. Rusty says:

    If it were Micah Richards against anyone else, he’d get my vote. He has amazing thighs.

    But Paolo Maldini rules all.

    (LOL, I can’t gloat over my team winning cuz I’d feel bad, and I also feel bad for making a comment on the lateness of the TTO. Even though I stopped my workout for this and should prolly get back on the elliptical trainer for 20 minutes after my 20 on the treadmill and 20 on the ARC trainer.)

    (And I keep typing thighs as “things.“ Oy.)

    keyword: waiting25! hahahaha!

  81. Bella says:

    Maldini has quite impressive staying power if you ask me, add that to the highly experienced thighs and beautiful eyes and I’m in. MALDINI.

  82. c9 says:

    Congratulations MrsXabi on your husbands win! I hope your feeling better tomorrow, Luv’ ya’ <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="kiss" style="border:0;" />

  83. carly says:

    Maldini for me.

    We’re talking about thighs that have been building up since many of us were born (or even before that) and in the highest level of competition.

    But this is a tough contest.

  84. c9 says:

    FINALLY, kickette, the thighs have arrived! Holy F**&! I mean WOW, both sets of thighs are impeccable, hard to choose, which to choose, do I really have to choose question

    and the weekly TTTO goes to PAOLO MALDINI !!!!!!

    I can’t deny such an exquisite italian specimen such as Paolo to not get my vote. I could just lick those thighs, oops sorry Cris, I promise I didn’t lay a finger on him wink

  85. Victoria says:


    “He’s a frickin’ god.“ ~TFO

    I couldn’t have said it any better.

  86. LucyLu says:


    As a rule, Italian thighs > English thighs (except when Gerrard’s are involved)

  87. Paolo.  He’s a frickin’ god.

  88. Moongirl (Mrs Sender says:

    Got to be Micah – seen em loads this season at Eastlands and they still make me drool embaressingly.

    They’re also ‘wrapped’ in a far better kit IMO!!!

  89. Maldini. Yum. Oh, I mean, eh… sorry Nando.

  90. RedGirl (Mrs. Casill says:


    Congrats to Xabi!!

  91. k2k2milan says:


    hands down!!!

    yeah! my milan captain!!!

    thighs of steel baby!

  92. nicole says:

    now this is a tough choice. but i’m going to go with…
    micah… mmmmmmm