March 19th, 2009

The TTO: Salomon Kalou v Joe Cole

Time for the boys in blue to man up and show us what they’re made of.  More specifically, what their quads and hamstrings are made of. 

Today sees the lovely Joe Cole taking on the equally lush Salomon Kalou.

Let us quickly make an important point: when putting together a Chelsea-specific thigh off, it is practically impossible not to include one of the thightastic greats of our time, Frank Lampard. Or, in the words of one of our readers, LL: ‘Frank is Chelsea thighs.  End of discussion.‘

Agreed. But for today, Frank will be sitting this one out and has instead decided to go shopping for more short-shorts.

Now let’s get on with the show!


What’s Salomon Kalou’s story? Well, he’s a striker who hails from the Ivory Coast, he’s 6’1” and he was so excited when he signed for Chelsea in 2006 that he brought a camera on his first day to take photos. “This was the dream moment of my life and I did not want to wake up and find out that it was not real.“ Cute, huh?  Our dream moment with Salomon also involves a camera, but let’s leave it at that.



Although Joe Cole is currently sidelined with an injury that will keep him off the pitch until next season, there’s no reason we can’t pay homage to this 27-year-old midfielder. After all, he’s provided us with many thightastic moments over the years, whether it’s playing for England or for Chelsea. This summer he’ll be making his relationship official when he marries long-time gal Carly Zucker. Enjoy ‘em now, ladies, these are limited edition, soon to be off-market thighs.


Random but coincidental fact: both Joe and Salomon’s first car was a Volkswagon. Not sure that will help with the decision-making process, but there you have it.

Who gets your vote this week?

Congrats to last week’s winner, Michael Rensing, who barely beat Massimo Oddo in a seriously close contest. Well done, Michael, have a beer on us, mate.

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57 Responses to “The TTO: Salomon Kalou v Joe Cole”

  1. sbhardy says:

    No question about this one for me. It's Joe :-)

  2. Pingu says:

    they’re both adorable. but i’ll go kalou.

  3. Blondie says:

    Kalou =)

  4. Boston Red says:

    Kalou's thighs in the first pic are truely magnificent! He gets my vote!

  5. Mrs Mark Hudson says:

    Joe Cole blates!

  6. Meer. says:

    I like my tighs nice and firm. Sorry Joe, you lose. Salomon Kalou, although I'm glad you never made it to dutch naturilisation and therefor the dutch squad, you have some fabulous tighs! (Love the tighs in the national team pic)

  7. chelseagal_joeycoleswife says:

    my oh my you’ve answered my prayers :D JOEY COLE OF COURSE!!! even if kalou does almost match up x

  8. LizB (Mrs. Vucinic) says:

    Those thighs in the very first picture have me voting for Kalou. Yum.

  9. kimmila_2000 says:

    Kalou,, the camera incident was adorable !

  10. carly says:

    It is Kalou, I’m afraid.

    Too right, Frank would beat anyone.

  11. Kahtilyn13 says:

    NO Contest! This week should go to Kalou! God look at those thighs!!! I love a man with great muscular legs!!!

  12. SpaceCowgirl says:

    mmmmm Joey Cole thigh action. Suddenly I’m glad my BF’s out for the evening….

  13. Nina (Mrs Gerrard) says:

    Joey for me

  14. Phoenix says:


  15. mrscudicini says:

    Yes, LL and I discussed that the Chelsea crown will ever go to Frank, but Joey Cole, work it baby!

  16. carly says:

    It is Kalou, I'm afraid. Too right, Frank would beat anyone.

  17. LoveLamps says:

    My vote goes to Frank. The other ladies can vote for these two adorable Blues, but my vote is still for Frank.

  18. gina says:

    awww thankyou for the chelsea thighoff!! i love bothhhh :( but if i really have to choose- my vote goes to Joe!

  19. Kelly says:

    kalou all the wayy! mmm YUM! <img src="; width="19" height="19" alt="raspberry" style="border:0;" />

  20. Jo says:

    Based on the photos posted, they seem to be even stevens in the thigh department.  However, I think Joey is cuter so he gets my vote.

  21. allie says:

    joe cole joe cole joe cole (:
    merci thankyou goodbye

  22. gina says:

    it just has to be joe seeing as he’s injured- he has to win something this season!!!

  23. Tracy says:

    Sweet Jesus! Those are some nice thighs on Kalou!

  24. iana says:

    kalou.the first pic is rediculous and they seem verrry smooth. grr

  25. shay says:

    gonna have to go with Kalou, although Joe is no slouch in the thigh department

  26. tinka says:

    Hullo Kickettes! Long time reader, first time commentor here :) Just thouhgt that this would be a fine moment finally to have a say in these wonderful, wonderful thihg-offs. I'm really impressed by Kalou's thihgs but it was the last picture that strangely captivated my attention (and I was looking the thihgs only…). So have to go with Joe :)

  27. Fer_Lahm says:

    Frankie is Chelsea's TTO:) but i go for Joe:)

  28. bundesliga says:

    This is way to hard. I'm going to go with Joe.

  29. 'TorresNubianQu says:

    definetly KALOU'S cholcolatey thighs theyre looking scrumptious…sorry joe if its purely on the thighs ama have to go with the brotha on this one ;-)

  30. Dani.Mrs José says:

    Joey gets my vote ! x

  31. striker says:


  32. Dreamgirl says:

    I feel unable to see past the person here. I know this is wrong. Therefore my vote must go to Joe. (I acknowledge the mighty thighs of Kalou but can't bring myself to vote for him)

  33. Genevieve Gourcuff says:

    I vote for the adorable Kalou! but it was close

  34. FirstTeamCoach says:

    Kalou's thighs in the first pic made my decision very dificult, most impressive. However my vote has to go to Joe.

  35. aristeia says:

    Okay, I really try to make a concerted effort during TTOs to separate my affection for particular ballers and just look at thighs. Kalou is quite nice, but Joey Cole… he's the winner for me. Even just on thighs. :)

  36. Dee13 (mrs m metze) says:

    joe cole's a button, but kalou wins here…and YAY rensing for winning last week's… *-*

  37. Ali says:

    joey cole!

  38. Becca says:

    Frank 'Thigh' Lampard Is The Only Chelsea Boy For The Win Here, But I Suppose Hes Gotta Give Other People A Chance, Which Means Joe Gets My Vote!

  39. BS_guapa_grl6 says:

    My vote def has to go for Joe Cole..cant wait to see him back on the field.

  40. MrsXabiAlonso says:

    Kalou smashes Joe's little thighs. Salomon FTW this week!

  41. TammyV says:


  42. Elise says:

    While neither of the two have the biggest, most spectacular thighs in Chelsea- that would be Frank of course, whose thighs are the most spectacular in all the world!- they *are* very, very nice. It was so, so close with these two, but that first pic really is fantastic, so Kalou has my vote. (Joey Cole, I know there are several ladies lining up to console you, so I won't feel too bad for you. lol)

  43. Erin says:

    Both quite impressive thighs, but I think my vote has to go to Kalou.

  44. Eternal Dreamer says:


  45. LampardLover777 says:

    Its gotta be… JOEY COLE! ^.^

  46. The Fourth Official says:

    I adore Joe, but one can’t deny the thigh of Kalou.

  47. Rebecca says:

    Kalou, hands down!

  48. HiL says:

    Joe Cole gets my vote.

  49. banri says:

    Kalou, mmh!

  50. nicki says:

    As much as I adore Kalou I could never ever ever vote against Joey Cole. So Joey it is.

  51. autumnmaple101 says:

    Joe Cole! Pity Frank had to sit out this one hmmpph

  52. boo says:

    what?!?!?!? that kitten beat Oddo? so not fair!!!!!!!!! and Kalou for the win!

  53. AJ says:

    Why is Frank “the thighmaster” Lampard left out while doing a Chelsea themed TTO? I guess he would win almost by default therefore rendering the contest useless? :P Still, the pictures would’ve been nice.I guess I have to go with Kalou. Pfft.

  54. MrsXabiAlonso says:

    Kalou smashes Joe’s little thighs. Salomon FTW this week!

  55. TammyV says:


  56. FootballerChick43 - "Mrs.Ballack" says:

    I love them both! This is really hard, lol… well… based on the thighs and the thighs only… Saloman Kalou. Sorry Joe :(

  57. lose that girl says:

    Oh, Ms. Kickette! Thanks for some Joe! My choice is pretty obvious….JOE! I miss him very much. *sigh*

    lose that girl blog