October 31st, 2008

Trick or Treat, Baller Edition

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Happy Halloween, Kickettes!

Since we’ve yet to decide on our costume for this evening’s festivities, we’re going to procrastinate and play our favourite Halloween-themed baller game, Trick or Treat, ‘Baller Edition.


Btw: can anyone shed some light on why every option for women is prefaced by skank? ie, slutty- football- supporter- chick, slutty- witch, slutty- cheerleader, slutty- zombie, etc?

Anyhoo, the rules of ToT, Baller Edition are simple, but strict:

Two ballers knock on your door dressed in their best costume.  You have to decide which one of them gets a trick, and which one gets a treat.  Who are you giving the best candy to and who gets a blast of sneezing powder?  Someone has to go home with empty pockets, and it’s up to you.

There goes the doorbell!  Throw on a skanky-nurse costume and click on through.

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First up – Fernando Torres: an ambitious new fireman, fresh out of training. Has yards of extra hose;

vs Xabi Alonso, the confident, transatlantic pilot with a swagger that can only come from hooking up with half of the stewardesses on the last NY-London flight in.

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Next, Iker Casillas, a bristling, brooding Zorro. He has a mask and dresses in black. ‘Nuff said;

vs Doctor Santa Cruz, known for his gentle bedside manner.  Ready, as always, to give a full and comprehensive physical.

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Francesco Totti: a swarthy cowboy kitted out in requisite leather chaps and a large lasso;

vs Sylvain Distin – an experienced police officer who isn’t afraid to use his truncheon if necessary;

(wow, this really is getting extremely cheesy and a tad playgirl catalogue, but we’ve started so we might as well finish)

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Finally, Yoann Gourcuff, the gladiator. Fights lions with his bare hands and feels no need to ever wear a shirt;

vs Owen Hargreaves as a hardworking mechanic. Good with grease and not afraid to get dirty.

Who wins your Trick or Treat-Off this All Hallow’s Eve?

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51 Responses to “Trick or Treat, Baller Edition”

  1. Josie says:

    for me: Xabi, Iker, Totti, and Yoann

  2. suzie says:

    loving this post kickette. For me the treats would be nando(looking hot in the pic you posted of him i have to say),iker,totti and gourcuff.

  3. Sandy says:

    treat for: -Nando -Iker -Totti -Owen trick for: all the others ;-)

  4. Lucy says:

    Nando, Roque, Totti and Gourcuff for the treats! Thank you Kickette, I needed this!

  5. Lucy says:

    Nando, Roque, Totti and Gourcuff for the treats! Thank you Kickette, I needed this!

  6. Dreamgirl says:

    I’m a bit late here bt I have to make my choice. Since Nando and Xabi are the first ones to knock on my door I will have to send Xabi away (sadly)and give Nando all my treats and whatever else I can find. Thereafter I will regretfully not be able to open the door anymore and have to pass on all the other ones.

  7. Pavi (Mrs Metzelder) says:

    Treat for Xabi, Roque, Totti and Owen Trick for Nando, Iker, Distin and Yoann

  8. Moonie says:

    Thanks FTC, thats the joy of working with children you see – germ riddled creatures!!!

  9. *ele* says:

    1)absolutelly nando… the last yoann…the other I don't like them…

  10. Nic says:

    Omg. This might be one of the best Kickette posts I’ve ever seen. My treats will be going as followS: Fireman Nando Dr. Santa Cruz Totti the Cowboy Gourcuff the Gladiator My god… if only… Totti could lasso me, Gourcuff could fight him while Nando saves me, and then Santa Cruz could examine me… ahhhhhhhhhhhh

  11. TammyV says:

    Xabi – treat; Nando – trick Iker – Treat; Roque – trick Totti – Treat; Distin – trick Owen – Treat; Yoann – trick those were totally unfair pairings! Why was DeFoe not against Iker and Barton against Roque for example! Cruel Kickette, cruel

  12. Malin ("MrsFernandoTorres", if I may) says:

    Trick for: Nando Iker Totti (I KNOW! Meep.) Yoann And a hug at distance for Moonie!

  13. iker-ness says:

    1.nando/ killed me to make a decsion. 2.iker./ also a battle of sex on legs 3. totti ;) 4. yoann, cos the foreigne name :) TRICK OR TREAT

  14. GO says:

    a big bag of treats to Nando :D ok ok i’ll play by the rules so treats to Nando fireman, Iker Zorro, Totti cowboy and Gourcuff gladiator… and gentle trick to Xabi yum yum pilot!!! (and call him at the back door and offer a consolation treat)

  15. xXFernandoXx says:

    This was tough, but i'll go with treats for Torres, Casillas, Totti and Gourcuff!

  16. Blondie says:

    Treat =] Fireman Nando, Zorro Iker, Cowboy Totti, Gladiator Yoann =]

  17. aristeia says:

    Nando v. Xabi — THAT'S JUST CRUEL. CRUEL. Officer Nando. God, that pained me… Xabi, forgive me please. Iker v. Dr. Cruz — Dr. Cruz, your sexy nurse is here! Totti v. Distin — YEEHAW, ER PUPONE. Gourcuff v. Owen — Diry Owen? Yes, please.

  18. Pavi (Mrs Metzelder) says:

    Treat for Xabi, Roque, Totti and Owen Trick for Nando, Iker, Distin and Yoann

  19. Malin ("MrsFern says:

    Trick for: Nando Iker Totti (I KNOW! Meep.) Yoann And a hug at distance for Moonie!

  20. TammyV says:

    Xabi – treat; Nando – trick Iker – Treat; Roque – trick Totti – Treat; Distin – trick Owen – Treat; Yoann – trick those were totally unfair pairings! Why was DeFoe not against Iker and Barton against Roque for example! Cruel Kickette, cruel

  21. lose that girl says:

    Oh Moonie!!! I would hug you but… Sorry, my sweet! Hope you feel better soon. Your profile photo – YUM!

  22. paruresis says:

    omg, halloween got some new monsters. hihi.
    Yoann is my fav.

  23. ljungberg lusty says:

    oh lord I haven’t posted in forever but this deserves some serious contemplation and attn.
    based on profession alone…
    pilot (preferably mile high)
    Zorro
    no cowboys or police men for me
    gladiator… yum!

  24. Natnova says:

    OMG What a great Holloween this is. OK, here goes:

    The pilot, the doc, the cowboy (but not Totti, the actual cowboy), and the gladiator….

  25. mrs nandrina torres says:

    these are the best rick or treaters that have ever knocked on my door!!!!
    FIREMAN FERNANDO
    although its hard to resist iker, DOCTOR SANTA CRUZ
    PC DISTIN – never say no to a policeman.
    OWEN THE MECHANIC.
    that was really hard!!!

  26. blessedxxx says:

    Fireman Nando
    Iker in Black
    Totti the cowboy
    and The Gladiator

    yummm x

  27. mrscudicini says:

    Can I give all 4 treats to Iker?

  28. Moonie says:

    Not too fussed about any of the others really but as im in bed with mumps I think I seriously need a treat from Dr Roque!

  29. FirstTeamCoach says:

    Forgetting my manners – Thank you kickette for thinking of this post! Best one ever!

  30. FirstTeamCoach says:

    Ohhhh Moonie, you have mumps *sends hugs and get well soon wishes* My treats are for, Nando, Roque,Totti and of course Owen. Owen will get a few extra treats *wink* (sorry LTG)

  31. autumnmaple101 says:

    Treat for: Xabi, Iker, Totti and Owen. *drools*

  32. mistresschristina says:

    Treats: Fireman Nando, Dr. Santa Cruz, Cowboy Totti, and HOLY SHIT Gladiator Gourcuff! ( I do not know this last boy, and as such, I am off to google his awesomeness!)

  33. Dee13 (mrs m metze) says:

    paging dr. roque… ;)

  34. Callie says:

    Treats for Iker, Totti, Gourcuff As for the treat between Nando and Xabi, well airports have to have constant presence of firemen in case of emergencies. I think this is one such case.

  35. Shandora says:

    Mmmm. Mechanics have never been quite so appealing before.

  36. LynxKitten says:

    Treat for Totti and Iker only :) And Metzelder if I have my way.

  37. DC says:

    treats (many treats) for Xabi and Iker. Totti and Yoann too.

  38. mrs jt ;) says:

    Hmm the first one was the hardest, but i have to go with nando im afraid. second ones iker no doubt about it ;) totti got my treat :) and last but no least i had to go with youanngourcuff. amazing little game kickette. get well soon moonie, if santa cruz knocks on my door, i'll send him straigh to yours :P

  39. Laura Dagger says:

    ooo love it kickette! the first one pains me but it'd be treat for Nando and trick for Xabi, treat for Iker and trick for ROque, treat for Distin and trick for Totti and treat for Gourcuff and trick for Hargreaves. Aww what a lovely night that'd be! And i spent all day in work dressed as a devil and hopefully did not look slutty! Hope u feel better for next week MG x

  40. FootballerChick43 - says:

    1. Treat for Torres. 2. Treat for Iker. That one was ESPECIALLY hard. I had to go through all the pros and cons here. And finally Iker had more. It pained me to say so but… alas. 3. Treat for Totti. I'm from Kentucky – you have to have a little thing for cowboys :P Just kidding. 4. Treat for Gourcuff, just because Hargreaves was way too covered. Had the costumes been reversed, it would have been Hargreaves.

  41. Erin says:

    Oh, and I don't get the sluttified halloween thing either. It's every girl's opportunity to dress like a skank and feel justified in doing so? I don't know. But regardless….delightful post all around, Kickette! :)

  42. Erin says:

    Eeek, some of these are tough! The first one is like Sophie's Choice!!! OK, I'm going to go with treats for Xabi…Roque…Totti…Gourcuff

  43. nyclfclvr says:

    I know, aristeia. CRUEL. I’ve failed to complete this task because I’m still stuck on the first one. Their costumes are sort of interchangeable, no? Firemarshall Xabi, Captain Nando?

  44. SpaceCowgirl says:

    Pilot Xabi, Zorro Iker, Cowboy Totti, Gladiator Gourcuff. Man-alive, I need a hosing down! :OP (maybe i could get fireman Nando to do that…)

  45. kate says:

    XABI AS A PILOT? OH GOD I CAN’T THINK.

  46. Becca says:

    Ohh This Is Too Hard!!!!
    Ill Have To Say Treat For Nando And His Hose And For Iker. The Cowboy (Francesco Totti) Would Get A Treat ;) And Yoann Gourcuff.
    But If I Could Choose All Of You I Would, I Wouldnt Mind if Any Of Them Knocked On My Door! ;)
    Best Post Everr! :D , I Loved It
    Get Well Soon Moonie xx

  47. Beth says:

    I have been away over the weekend and so very nearly missed this feature – which is brilliant btw, but quite a tough one! It will have to be treats for Xabi (unfortunately no question on this one), Iker (this one was closer than i thought it would be!), Totti and Gourcuff.

  48. Venice says:

    Xabi, Xabi, Xabi, Iker, Xabi, Xabi, Iker, Iker, Iker, Xabi, Iker, Iker!!

    Whatever involves them, I don’t care!

  49. Laura Dagger says:

    ooo love it kickette! the first one pains me but it’d be treat for Nando and trick for Xabi, treat for Iker and trick for ROque, treat for Distin and trick for Totti and treat for Gourcuff and trick for Hargreaves. Aww what a lovely night that’d be! And i spent all day in work dressed as a devil and hopefully did not look slutty! Hope u feel better for next week MG x

  50. justlikexabi says:

    the policeman, doctor, cowboy and the mechanic.

  51. lose that girl says:

    Treat for *OWEN*. You didn’t have to ask…you knew already! Cheeky! And I would treat him to all my *ahem* tricks too (no sneezing powder allowed!).

    lose that girl blog