April 10th, 2012

WAG Watch: Everyone vs Jenny Vampire

Chantelle Tagoe Jessica Lawlor wives and girlfriends Cricket Boutique Liverpool party

WAGs who aren’t attached to this story attend the Cricket Christmas party, Liverpool, UK. 08/12/2010. Image: BIGPICTURESPHOTO.COM.

Manchester United, Man City, Liverpool and Everton WAGs have beef with Jennifer Thompson – of Mario Balotelli and Wayne Rooney tell-all fame and nouveau riche glory. They think she is classless, trashy and generally disapprove of her existence. “Ban her (from parties and footy/celeb haunts)!” is their battle cry, and they’ve supposedly set up a text message and Twitter tracking system for the hooker’s whereabouts to drive their point home.

Good stuff, this story.

A close friend of one of the WAGs released a rampage of high quality fightin’ words to the Daily Star

“All the partners of players at clubs in the north west have teamed up to tip off each other if they see or hear she’s in a club where their men might be going to. Once the alert has gone out, the WAGs will make sure their man doesn’t go to the club or bar where Jenny is, or they get someone to keep a close eye on their man and make sure he doesn’t get caught up in her arms.”

“Sadly, with some of the younger stars, there may be a temptation to try forbidden fruit to see how they compare with the likes of Balotelli and Rooney. She seems to rely on that but the WAGs have grown wise to it.”

Sounds like an intricate version of a leash and collar. Like the kind dogs and other pets that aren’t grown ass men living large on Easy Peasy Cheating Street wear.

WAGs ban band together uniteLadies, look. Well done on the plan hatching and all that, but you missed the stop-it-before-it-starts boat by two players and £70,000. Don’t try to scare your ‘ballers straight by calling her JennyVampire; vigorously encourage them to keep their members in their pants instead. It’s the right thing to do.

And by right thing, we also mean retaliate publicly with some sort of entertaining weapon like a can of spray foundation.

-

Lower on the footy totem pole but hey, what the hell, we’re already here – the Daily Star insists the vice girl has also romped with George Best’s son Calum, 31, but faltered in seducing 49-year-old Wayne Lineker, brother of Match Of The Day’s Gary.

“At Lineker’s Bar (in Tenerife) she met Calum Best who really fell for her but at first she was more interested in Wayne Lineker. She was wearing a very short and tight dress with her boobs popping out….she was really flirting with Wayne and doing her utmost to grab his attention.

But he was at the party with his girlfriend Ana who is really stunning and has an incredible figure so he wasn’t interested in Jenny.

That didn’t stop Jenny trying. She went into overdrive, thrusting her boobs into his face and she kept patting his bum.”

All the class, all the time, Kickettes.

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25 Responses to “WAG Watch: Everyone vs Jenny Vampire”

  1. [...] The WAGs of the Northwests (sounds like a band) have formed a spy network to prevent infamous prostitute Jennifer Thompson from getting her hooks into their players. Real life is absurd. // Kickette [...]

  2. AmelieLenoir says:

    Le jeu commence,putain.

  3. Donna C says:

    Who the f*uck cares? Their men cheat on them more than these hoes change their louboutins and while they're wasting time and energy trying to make sure that chick won't show up to events their men are busy dumping their loads in another woman's washing machine. All of this is so middle school.

  4. Juliette says:

    These WAGS are doing what all 'business' women do when their source of 'income' is under a threat of attack! So sad the behaviour of WAGS.

  5. Mrs_Q_Borri says:

    Is all About the MONEY!!

    This is the perfect example of what money makes people do these days!! Is just incredible. But one thing, all money for what?? The day you die all the money stays so other people can spend it.

  6. Mirella says:

    Who are the WAGs in the first picture?

  7. cupcakes says:

    Careful you don't get dizzy up on them high horses and fall off my WAGgy friends. After all J-Vamp exchanges sex for money and WAGs, err… Why is it girls want to be WAGs these days? Oh, yeah, for the money!

    (Although I'm obviously not talking about the Olallas & Colleens)

  8. IrishBlue says:

    She's giving all Jenny's (like me) a bad name! We're not all like that honest!!

  9. mata says:

    If I had to work that hard to keep my man faithful I'd be re-thinking my choice of man.

  10. LizzyHS90 says:

    I can rant on and on about how stupid these WAGS are & how stupid this story is but all I have to say is I don't feel sorry for stupid girls that stay with men that cheat on them.

    • Kat89 says:

      Hallelujah!!!

      • LizzyHS90 says:

        OMG! Did you see the new rumored "GF" of Rami? Typical glam model WAG wannabe.

        • Mrs. Q.Borri says:

          What!!!!!? I haven’t. OMG!! Ugh what is up with him! ‘glam model’ -yeah right-
          I going to pretend is just a rumor. Lol!! From where did you got this info?? :0

        • Mrs_Q_Borri says:

          What!!!? I haven't, lets just hope is a rumor. From where did you got this info? :0

          • LizzyHS90 says:

            Do you have twitter? I typed in Adil Rami in the search box and then hit ALL then all the tweets with his name on it come up and you find them.

            I hope this works: http://www.futbolprimera.es/2012/04/10/sidoni-bie…

            • Gladys says:

              Aw, kind of sad. She's very beautiful. But there is not a single photo of her with actual, non-lingerie clothing on. If you went by the definition of "modeling" that these magazines seem to use, we'd all be wearing bras, bathing suits, and panties to work. ;)

              • Mrs_Q_Borri says:

                LOL! panties and bras to work!!
                Is very true I saw her on the site Lizzy put and she is beatiful… But lets just see how she turns out to be.

            • Mrs_Q_Borri says:

              I have Twitter and I'm following him!! But he obviously hasn't put anything about that. The site you put did work, like I said before maybe is just rumors from crazy tabloids but if is not lets just hope she does good to him! :')

              • LizzyHS90 says:

                She is pretty but fake boobs and modeling lingerie is just so typical. I was hoping he picked better girls. Hopefully they just hooked up and that was that lol.

                • Mrs_Q_Borri says:

                  Yeah, I know… He can do so much better and is so typical a lingerie model with fake boobs. In conclusion a WAG wannabe! Unless she proves us wrong -if the thing is real- snd she turns out to be a good down to earth woman! I hope so!!