January 17th, 2008

WAG Watch: Charlotte and Alex Celebrate 2008…Late

A bevvy of barely B through D list celebs, reality TV “stars”, and other such riff raff made their way to the OK! Magazine New Years Party on Tuesday night at the Embassy club in London.  Alex Curran-Gerrard and Charlotte Mears were in attendance in full fashion-crimes-against-nature style choices. 

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images courtesy of Splash News/KEYSTONE press

Charlotte recently sold a big story to the NOTW about her recovery from the Jermain Defoe/ Danielle Lloyd betrayal .  She confessed that the only thing that helped her get through the ordeal was a new pair of breast implants.  Her “triumphant” and larger-sized return to the scene wasn’t without a date – but we’ve yet to confirm if he was a baller or a random. 

We have no clue why she decided to flex the glasses and moustache mask.  We think there was a theme going on as one of the other guests was seen getting into a taxi with a paper bag over their head.  We’re serious. 

Not to be outdone, Alex showed up in her usual all-labels all-the-time look.  The thigh high (size 14?) boots say, “I’m a sexy dominatrix”.  The fringe skirt says, “I like arts and crafts and upholstery.“  Interesting blend of mixed messages, but who are we to judge.  If we were attending a New Year’s party three weeks after the start of the year our clothes would probably be rather confused as well.

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26 Responses to “WAG Watch: Charlotte and Alex Celebrate 2008…Late”

  1. I am not gonna lie to you. After few minutes of searching (while having this almost heart attack) I am convinced that it's a mistake, the comment is surely about Iniesta!

  2. Alex has an apt name, a short form of Alexander, and she does look like she's enlisting for Alexander's army.

  3. I’ll take it one step further: Get TV out of the business of dictating victory lane celebrations, start times, everything!

  4. apx alarm co says:

    Alex.  I finally figured out what her skirt reminds me of:  the tear-off phone numbers on the bottom of a notice posted on the grocery store bulletin board, advertising unwanted household items, cheap, best offer.

  5. Sarah x says:

    I Like Charlotte’s Dress <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/smile.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="smile" style="border:0;" />

  6. goalkeeperette says:

    I wouldn’t be caught DEAD in Alex’ outfit! Too much Pocahontas-meets-hooker-gear for me, thx. How does she manage to always always ALWAYS wear at least one intolerable item of clothes? It’s beyond me, really.
    (To say at least something nice about her, she does have a good body….at least she’s not wearing that stuff looking like a walrus)

  7. AnnaD says:

    yes, i’m jealous and bitter; let’s just get that out of the way right at the beginning…but Alex Curran-Gerrard is just an embarrassing mess…do she and Stevie do ANYthing together besides make kids?  she seems to be out and about all the time, and he’s such a homebody; i feel sorry for him—-he needs a missus who can make a nice, cozy home for him

    and that would, of course, be me…

  8. Lisa says:

    I actually quite like Alex’s ensemble here.  There are two possible reasons for this.  Firstly, I lived in Liverpool for far too long (I even liked the sparkly blue tights in a previous outfit).  Alternatively, Alex usually has such horrendous outfits that this ain’t nearly so bad.  Who knows?

  9. Robin says:

    Charlottes dress looks like a version of something I wore to prom in the 80’s. Just mine was strapless or that short and my boobs were never that large.
    Alex, oh Alex. In contrast to the lovely Italian ladies we just saw, she looks like a walking train wreck. Money does not buy class my friends.

  10. Becca x says:

    What It Alex Wearing?  I Hate Everything About This Outfit.
    I Think Charlotte Looks Good, I Love The Dress [Maybe Not The Mask!] And I hope Her New Man Trets Her Better Then Jermaine Ever Did. I Cant Believe He Left Her For Danielle Lloyd, Charlotte Seems Like A Much Better Person.

  11. The Fourth Official says:

    Charlotte.  At what point do one’s breasts become so large that vertical perambulation becomes an impossibility?

    Sh*t, I envy the shoe collection though.  <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/mad.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="mad" style="border:0;" />

    Alex.  I finally figured out what her skirt reminds me of:  the tear-off phone numbers on the bottom of a notice posted on the grocery store bulletin board, advertising unwanted household items, cheap, best offer.

  12. cassie says:

    despite the strange disguise, i think charlotte looks cute and isn’t too over-the-top, simple shoes, hair and jewelry with a trendy party dress.  i do feel sorry for the poor thing, i would hate to be the girl kicked out by that skank dani, that being said, i’d probably get some new boobs too. 

    no idea what alex is wearing, looks like something pocahontas would sport.  at least her hair isn’t infused with 10 gallons of hairspray.

  13. Elise says:

    Fourth – I was thinking the same thing about Alex’s middle but didn’t say anything about it for the same reason!  Too funny.  You really see it in the pic Kickette posted.  It doesn’t look like pregnant to me.  It looks like a few too many cookies- or fruity drinks.  And I’m LMAO at the link to the number skirt.  But I still like Alex’s outfit.  I’d totally wear it. (Maybe I’m closer to WAGdom than I think. LOL)

    By the way, here’s my disclaimer:  I do not find Alex fat.  I do not find any of the WAGS we discuss here fat.  They are all different.  Everybody is different.  And we can all look good being our different selves with our different sized bottoms.

  14. linz says:

    Alex’s skirt looks like she’s making her way into battle for Troy.  So i approve from the waist up.

  15. The Fourth Official says:

    LMAO!  That’s EXACTLY what I was thinking of, Kaya.

  16. kaya says:

    TFO,
    I was so busy looking up perambulation after reading your first post that I didn’t catch the part about the phone numbers. How very right you are, and it totally reminds me of an image a friend spammed my inbox with a while ago.

    The phone numbers on the skirt would go very well indeed with those boots. (Disclaimer, link may be NSFW)

  17. carly says:

    Sorry, slip of the tongue there: it was comment, not common!

    Wonder why I said that…

  18. carly says:

    I’m not even going to common on the bottom part of Alex’s outfit. But I will say that a word comes to mind. Starts with S, ends with T, in the middle there’s a U and an L <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/raspberry.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="raspberry" style="border:0;" />

  19. Elise says:

    Hey here’s another pic of Alex leaving the party and you can see the entire outfit a bit better.  I’m gonna risk ridicule here and say I’m actually liking it. Not the eye makeup though.

    http://www.contactmusic.com/photos.nsf/main/alex_…

  20. The Fourth Official says:

    Kaya, you’re killing me.  You’re on fire, girl. <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/lol.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" />

  21. The Fourth Official says:

    Maybe, Elise.  You can see the pleat detail on her skirt better in that pic.  Maybe not so horrendous.  But dare I say (for fear of being called a fat-ist wink ), that she looks a bit soft around the tummy to be drawing attention to it with that waistline detail?  Just saying – nobody have a cow, or anything.  Or maybe she *is* pregnant. 

    Just as an aside:  check out her fingers. Holy diamonds, Batman.

  22. brandy says:

    Wow. That new picture makes the whole outfit and make up a whole lot of wrong! Kickette, you were being kind in displaying the “good” picture of her.

  23. kaya says:

    Another random thought:
    Between Colleen’s bag and Alex’s skirt tassle thingees, they could start a WAG charity car wash event.

  24. brandy says:

    OMG – did she seriously get new bigger boobs to “recover”?! Did she really say that?! I’m wondering if the interviewer pulled a Kickette golden balls question out to get that response!

    Never thought I’d say this, but Alex’s hair and even make up look cute/appropriate/toned down. This must have been the Alex Stevie fell in love with. Normal, human, not as orange as usual Alex <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/wink.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="wink" style="border:0;" /> She was close even on the outfit too – keep the short white skirt idea but just lose the Tonto tassles motif. And if the boots had normal soles instead of the hooker wedge. I mean, you are 6ft as is, do you really need extra sole?!

    So close my dear, soooooooooooo close!

  25. kaya says:

    Alex is totally flashing a gang sign.
    She is so hard core. Scouse in da house yo!

  26. The Fourth Official says:

    I don’t know about normal, Brandy.  hmmm  Don’t you think the Barbarella eye makeup has got to go?