December 19th, 2011
Wayne Rooney vs. Frankie Cocozza: Say What?!
Original Image: Dave Hogan/Getty Images.
If you give Photoshop-enabled laptops to the Mayhem & Fruit Beverage Suite bishes, this is what you can expect to happen. We’ve learned this now and are trying to retrieve the computers, although judging by the state of the intern who returned empty handed from the Suite a few moments ago, our journey will be a long, hard one.
To be fair though, this hideous chimera of Wayne Rooney and X-Factor UK reject Frankie Cocozza is just about weird and unpleasant enough to match the Twitter row the two became embroiled in at the weekend.
For reasons we cannot yet fathom, the ‘bad boy’ of British TV hell kicked off proceedings with a tweet implying Mr Rooney may have odour issues. Unsurprisingly, Wazza wasn’t hugely impressed with this slur on his sweet (we’re sure) smelling pits and pretended to only vaguely recollect who Cocozza was.
Presumably this is a problem Frankie runs into on a regular basis, and noted that to be not only recognised but indeed ‘merked’ by the England striker was a big deal. For Wayne it was obviously less so, and he didn’t bother to respond to Frankie’s cheery ‘good luck in the Euros’ tweet.
Still, we appreciate the effort they both went to. How else were we ever going to get an opportunity to see what Wazza would look like with a nice big bouff?