April 6th, 2010
Weekend Observations: Waistlines and Big Wins
Who ate so much this past extended weekend that they have chocolate oozing from their pores?
That’s a trick question, since we all know the answer. Especially the elasticated waistbands we’re bringing back for spring/summer 2010.
Not sure about you, Kickettes, but the holiday-weekend-that-was reminded us that too much family time makes us feel as crabby as Marco Borriello looks. Thank goodness for the edge-of-our-seats series of footy matches fighting for our love and attention in equal amounts as a certain great aunt with a moustache.
Since we were recklessly hungover on Monday, enjoy our abbreviated weekend results/observations/offerings today:
English Premier League
Who got their Chelsea v. Manchester United fix in 3D? We need confirmation as to whether Nemanja Vidic is as he-man hot in three dimension as he appears in high definition.
In possibly the biggest game of the weekend, Chelsea moved to the top of the table following their 2 – 1 Old Trafford win over Manchester United. When all was said and done, we realized that Nani is growing on us. See: his thighs.
Other EPL moments to note: Burnely edged one step closer towards relegation after falling to a wet Vincent Kompany & his Manchester City co.; Nicky B’s celebratory love-stare with Sol Campbell in honour of his game-winning goal and our re-acquaintance with George Elokobi’s six-pack
The Spanish league’s top tier title race seems to still be pretty open, but we could barely see past the universally horrendous hairstyles that stole the on-pitch spotlight over the weekend.
The hair of the Real Madrid men continued to go crazy – and not in a good way. And we’d like to wrist slap the fool who helped Leo Messi decide upon this mess of a mane. With friends like that, who needs enemies?
The only Spanish league saving grace came in the form of Sergio ‘Kun’ Aguero. Hombre was sporting a cropped cut with short spikes up top. We’re totally feeling his new look.
Most importantly, you can soldier on through the rest of your week with confidence because David Villa’s soul patch remained intact and showed zero signs of slowing our pulses down.
What’s one sure-fire Kickette ‘get noticed’ guarantee? Capture Yoann Gourcuff ‘capturing’ himself. Kudos, Getty Images.
Other Ligue 1 moments to note: Carlos Bocanegra’s Rennes squad lost to Lyon; Marseilles’s Mathieu Valbuena and Fabrice Abriel played a rousing game of bench blanket buddies.
Well, we’ve already established that AC Milan’s Borriello is consistently steamier than Victoria Beckham’s broccoli and this weekend was no exception. He and his ‘skin is in’ counterparts brought their ‘A’ game to the Italian pitch. Too bad we were too preoccupied by the dessert buffet to catch it live.
For example, Fabio Cannavaro did that(^), causing a premature demise of our manscaping-obsessed souls.
That’s pretty much all the Serie A ‘news’ we can process today. Hey – we did say “abbreviated”.
The game-threatening bouncing Bayern bulge was at it again and claimed Schalke 04 as its’ latest victim. The Munchen men now sit atop the German league table with 5 games to go.