April 6th, 2010

Weekend Observations: Waistlines and Big Wins

AC Milan Marco Borriello

Who ate so much this past extended weekend that they have chocolate oozing from their pores?

That’s a trick question, since we all know the answer. Especially the elasticated waistbands we’re bringing back for spring/summer 2010.

Not sure about you, Kickettes, but the holiday-weekend-that-was reminded us that too much family time makes us feel as crabby as Marco Borriello looks. Thank goodness for the edge-of-our-seats series of footy matches fighting for our love and attention in equal amounts as a certain great aunt with a moustache.

Since we were recklessly hungover on Monday, enjoy our abbreviated weekend results/observations/offerings today:

English Premier League

Manchester United
Who got their Chelsea v. Manchester United fix in 3D?  We need confirmation as to whether Nemanja Vidic is as he-man hot in three dimension as he appears in high definition.

In possibly the biggest game of the weekend, Chelsea moved to the top of the table following their 2 – 1 Old Trafford win over Manchester United. When all was said and done, we realized that Nani is growing on us. See: his thighs.

Arsenal v. Wolverhampton Wolves

Other EPL moments to note: Burnely edged one step closer towards relegation after falling to a wet Vincent Kompany & his Manchester City co.; Nicky B’s celebratory love-stare with Sol Campbell in honour of his game-winning goal and our re-acquaintance with George Elokobi’s six-pack

La Liga

Valencia's Joaquin Sanchez and David Villa

The Spanish league’s top tier title race seems to still be pretty open, but we could barely see past the universally horrendous hairstyles that stole the on-pitch spotlight over the weekend.

The hair of the Real Madrid men continued to go crazy – and not in a good way. And we’d like to wrist slap the fool who helped Leo Messi decide upon¬† this mess of a mane. With friends like that, who needs enemies?

The only Spanish league saving grace came in the form of Sergio ‘Kun’ Aguero. Hombre was sporting a cropped cut with short spikes up top. We’re totally feeling his new look.

Most importantly, you can soldier on through the rest of your week with confidence because David Villa’s soul patch remained intact and showed zero signs of slowing our pulses down.

Ligue 1


What’s one sure-fire Kickette ‘get noticed’ guarantee? Capture Yoann Gourcuff ‘capturing’ himself. Kudos, Getty Images.

Other Ligue 1 moments to note: Carlos Bocanegra’s Rennes squad lost to Lyon; Marseilles’s Mathieu Valbuena and Fabrice Abriel played a rousing game of bench blanket buddies.


Serie A

Juventus Cannavaro

Well, we’ve already established that AC Milan’s Borriello is consistently steamier than Victoria Beckham’s broccoli and this weekend was no exception. He and his ‘skin is in’ counterparts brought their ‘A’ game to the Italian pitch. Too bad we were too preoccupied by the dessert buffet to catch it live.

For example, Fabio Cannavaro did that(^), causing a premature demise of our manscaping-obsessed souls.

AS Roma match celebrationOh, and Daniele De Rossi took his pants off again. DDR should considering sacrificing his pants during next year’s season of Lent. Also, see Milan’s Genaro Gattuso. Viva Italia.

That’s pretty much all the Serie A ‘news’ we can process today. Hey – we did say “abbreviated”.


Thomas Mueller

The game-threatening bouncing Bayern bulge was at it again and claimed Schalke 04 as its’ latest victim. The Munchen men now sit atop the German league table with 5 games to go.

Weekend ResultsAnother Bundesliga moment to note: FC Koeln’s Petit took an upshort-exposing tumble against Hertha Berlin.

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35 Responses to “Weekend Observations: Waistlines and Big Wins”

  1. Mel says:

    Ronaldo looks soooo ridic with that haircut. He looks like Ken's latino counterpart.

  2. Inés says:

    I hated the match against Chelsea! but David Villa's sexy soul-patch and bitchface is all I need to heal the pain!

  3. aps says:

    Borriello's haircut is horrible.

    • Mel says:

      I agree. It gonna be hard to still love him after this…

      He has to pull out some serious moves.

  4. liesjuhh says:

    anyone seen Iker’s ripped shorts against santander??

    his orange pants wanted to get away from the orange (other shade) shirt…

  5. Anya says:

    Aren't you little harsh on Lady Gago? Because with this haircut he finally starts to look like an actual man.

    And Canna…I know he was born in early '70 but damn!

  6. livv4footy says:

    dammit. ooooh man u, where has our spark gone?

    but i am always optomistic for our Reds, and they will win the Prem, and the champs league :)

  7. MrsNesta says:

    Marco is looking fine with his ‘Borriello Cut’ and can have his hair/me any way he wants lol. Fabio ……….. I love you (thats all there is to say). DDR and Ringhio know how to keep the fans happy :)

    Arsenal won and keep the dream going, loved the goal celebration:


    Am a nervous wreck about tonight and have got my wine and cheese puffs at the ready :)

    • MrsNesta says:

      :( :( :( :(
      Gutted……just gutted, still love you all and know you will come back stronger to win the league.

      • Thea says:

        Hun, there is no disgrace to losing to Barca and more importantly Messi when he plays like that! Even the pundits are lost for words!

  8. Thea says:

    All I can say is that Messi can have the worst hair in the world with pigeons living in it if he plays like he is at the moment! He is AWESOME and just the best player in the world.

    Be afraid RM….be VERY afraid!

  9. Alessandra says:

    paulo~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! god, i miss seeing him!

    LOVEEEEE that foto of joaquin and villa! thanks, kickette!:D


  10. tammyv says:

    Monday’s match was good! Newcastle return…. and bringing crazy back

  11. carly says:

    Never in my life had I imagined I’d see Petit in the front page of Kickette (google image him if you must, or if you’re wiser than that, DON’T).

    Hair dos and don’ts: Borrielo looks terrible IMO, but Kun’s hair is looking fiiiine.

    This weekend was good in my corner of the world, Porto’s inner quality finally making an appearance. I also watched Rennes v Lyon – Bocanegra was very quiet, I barely saw him (also thanks to incredibly bad streams GRRR).

  12. Einah says:

    Thank God for Kickette! Wohooooo! Double yummy whammy with Daveeed and Canna :) In another universe I'd want to be Patricia and/or Daniella :)

    But for now I will promise this to you my luurrvvesss, I will hunt you in SA hahaha :)

    Yes, specially you Canna :D

  13. liv says:

    I love this game! look at Bordeux boys gracefully holding on to their family. As for manchester losing to chelsea; Rooney we need you!

  14. IrishBlue says:

    I’m just happy cos Chelsea beat Man Utd!! yeesssshhhhh…….my boyfriend was not a happy boy after that one, probably made worse by me wearing my chelsea jersey singing we are the champions…..

  15. Molly says:

    Starting off on a good note, I agree Marco is steamier than Victoria Beckham broccoli LOL :) . But I’m so, so, so upset that Manchester United lost to Chelsea. As much as I love my Frankie, I love my team even more and didn’t want to see them lose :( . I was thinking about boycotting my Frankie love for the week but it only lasted until Monday lol we are like Romeo and Juliet (I know I need help lol).

    • MrsNesta says:

      Be so much easier for you when he plays for England! And I take it you have the balcony fantasy going with frankie in mind lol

      • Molly says:

        Yeah it will definitley be easier when he goes to the world cup for England and everyone in my family doesn't look at me like it a sin for me to love him (I have his Chelsea kit hidden in my wardrobe lol). And yes I do have that balcony scene from Romeo and Juliet played out in my mind and when they are rolling around under the bed sheets (like in the Leonardo DiCaprio version lol). I can just imagine the two of us LOL. And then how I can give him the little boy he wants and our lifes would be just perfect. :) .

  16. iloveemanunited. says:

    i lovee nani :P x

  17. juventina says:

    God bless Serie A! I knew I loved calcio for a reason!

  18. LuvinBale says:

    Love DDR and his “no pants needed” attitude. Now if he could just impart this attitude on our friends in the EPL- that would be great.

  19. Louise says:

    Oh Canna. 36 and still bringing the goods. He never disappoints for the eye candy.

  20. The Barcagirl says:

    omg, I´m so nervous for the Barca game. I hope my beloved Bbs will win. I couldn`t stand it if……

    I´m so scared.


    Ok, Yogabreathing…

  21. Amy says:

    damn, yoann, the things you do to me!

  22. Thea says:

    I am so distracted by Yoann, I can't comment on anything else – and that even includes RM's continued crimes against class and style!

  23. Alisha! says:

    Haha, how I wish I was Sol Campbell right now!

  24. senora ramos says:

    lady gago and c ron. bless them and their hair dressers. ah well, at least we won!

    and wow leo!! wth?! veya's nummy soul patch sexiness. wish he would get that close to me ;)

    cannavaro – yesterday, today and tomorrow. that man just looks better and better. sigh.

    and love the yoann "capturing" himself. lol kickette. you slay me.

  25. Tula says:

    "Consistently steamier than Victoria Beckham's broccoli" Love it :D

  26. I choose to focus on the happy part of my weekend: TWO back to back wins for Ipswich Town over Reading and Derby. Absolutely vital points, after a horrible week of vicious rumours about Roy's job. I am so happy for Roy's Boys. :) Such a great group of lads too.