November 15th, 2010

Weekend Results: Apologies & Upsets

AC Milan’s Zlatan Ibrahimovic. This man is the gift that just keeps on giving, no? (Getty Images/Zimbio)

This morning, we would like to begin the Weekend Results post with a pledge. In future we shall try to avoid making statements on the good form or otherwise of a particular club. While it is vaguely amusing to see the application of our collective football knowledge shown up for what it is, we realise that continual damning of form clubs into the depths of embarrassment *may* alienate us from our readers. We offer our apologies to Chelsea fans in particular, a club whose form we recently described as imperious across all competitions.



Was it injuries? The departure of Ray Wilkins for undisclosed reasons? Or simply Sunderland playing a storming game of football? Having witnessed the game, and in particular, Nedum Onuoha’s (left) opening goal, we’re inclined towards the latter. Sunderland pulled off one of the shock results of the season so far, beating Chelsea 3-0 in their own backyard and simultaneously throwing a lifeline to most of the other top four contenders who failed to win. (Getty Images/Daylife)

Manchester City’s problems continued as a 0-0 draw with Birmingham City at Eastlands saw the team booed off by fans. Roberto Mancini’s position as manager is looking increasingly precarious, rumours that the club have approached Gus Hiddink for appointment in the summer not exactly helping matters.

After last week’s thrilling win over Chelsea, normal service was resumed for Liverpool, who were beaten 2-0 by Stoke City. In their well deserved victory, Stoke ran rings around Roy Hodgson’s bewildered-looking side, Ricardo Fuller and Kenwyne Jones providing the finishing touches. Last week Fernando Torres threw caution to the wind and in flashes looked like the striker we all know and love. This week he looked poor, but it was later revealed that he played with an ankle injury. It doesn’t look to be getting any better, Red Kickettes!

With Arsenal beating Everton 2-1 at Goodison Park in a tight game (left), Manchester United were the only other top four challengers to come out of the weekend with any semblance of dignity. 2-0 down after seventy six minutes, Federico Macheda and Nemanja Vidic snatched two late goals to avoid embarrassment against Aston Villa. (Getty Images/Zimbio)

Elsewhere, Gareth Bale scored two in Spurs 4-2 win over Blackburn and Newcastle drew 0-0 with Fulham.

La Liga

With Cristiano’s Ronaldo’s Safari boots still failing to find the back of the net, Leo Messi was able to close the gap in their personal scoring battle to one. Messi scored two goals in Barcelona’s 3-1 victory over Villareal, taking his tally for the season to ten. Cristiano remains on eleven, but Real Madrid retained top spot in La Liga after a 1-0 win away to Sporting Gijon, courtesy of Gonzalo Higuain. (Getty Images/Daylife)

Diego Forlan also scored two in Atletico Madrid’s 3-0 victory over Osasuna, ending a run of two months without a goal. We can’t find any evidence that he stripped in the now traditional fashion, but we would be more than happy if any of you out there could confirm whether his abs got an airing.

Serie A

A fifth minute Zlatan Ibrahimovic penalty was the difference in the Milan derby this weekend; he decided to celebrate this by offering us a simultaneous viewing of his tummy and thighs (top). The Rossoneri are now top of Serie A by one point from Lazio, who beat Napoli 2-0. Inter are joint fifth with Juventus, who drew 1-1 with Roma.

Antonio Di Natale scored a hat trick in Udinese’s 4-0 win over sixteenth placed Lecce, while Javier Pastore also bagged three in Palermo’s 3-1 victory over Catania. Udinese are eighth, just below Palermo in seventh.

Ligue 1

Remember Jeremy Pied, recently identified on this site and tagged ‘bona fide hottie?’ Well, happily he scored at the weekend in Lyon’s 1-0 defeat of Nice meaning we get to post a picture of him. Keep up the good work, Jeremy! (Getty Images/Daylife)

Brest retained the top spot in Ligue 1 despite a 1-1 draw against sixth place Marseille. Lille and Montpellier are snapping at their heels though, a 5-2 victory over Caen doing it for the former, a 1-0 win over Toulouse sufficient for the latter. Kickette favourites Arles drew 0-0 with Monaco and guess what? They’re bottom.


Bayern Munich continued their slow climb back to the top with a solid 3-0 showing against Nuremberg. Happily, Mario Gomez scored two and lifted his shirt up, a new habit we thoroughly approve of.

They’ll do well to catch Borussia Dortmund though, who are a hefty seven points clear at the top of the table after a 2-0 win over Hamburg. Bayer Leverkusen kept the gap to the minimum possible with a 1-0 away win against St Pauli, while third placed Mainz slipped up against Hannover with a 1-0 home defeat.

Schalke are sixteenth after a controversial 2-2 draw with Wolfsburg, while Borussia Monchengladbach put four past bottom placed Cologne. On our travels through the Bundesliga, we happened to find this random old photo of Monchen goalkeeper Logan Bailley (left), which we thought was quite hot. Further research revealed this. We predict that more coverage of this man is a possibility. (Getty Images/Daylife)

Highlights? Lowlights? Anything in-between for you, Kickettes?

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72 Responses to “Weekend Results: Apologies & Upsets”

  1. MrsFigo says:

    I was so upset at the score of the derby :( I don’t know what is going wrong with my Inter tight now. They were horrible. A lot of fans are just blaming Rafa but I don’t know, I have never been a fan of his though because I also like Manchester United ;) FORZA INTER i still believe!!!!!!

    Hmmm Manchester United :( it’s just not good enough right now. wE COULD HAVE GAINED SOME POINTS WITH Chelsea losing etc etc!!!

    Please can the Portuguese Superliga get coverage on here?? Sporting won :P SPORTING OLEEEEEEE <3 they have some cute (very) players too………


  2. diana says:

    Ha i am so happy for you …and for me!
    Forza Milan….+my beloved Nesta gave an incredible performance.He and Silva are def. the best center back.

  3. cherryboomboom says:

    I have a tiny question for the kickette admin …
    why do you like Arles so much ?

  4. Lotte (Zlatanista) says:

    He's got a great way of adjusting his clothes, that boy. I was half-slumbering in the sofa after having a football overdoze, but sat right up at the sight of the butt cheek.

  5. xbabyshakesx says:


    and Real Madrid ^____^

  6. Emme says:

    Hope you ladies don't mind me butting in on your conversation, but I just have to say this. I never really followed Serie A very closely, but I am beginning to see the appeal. Those boys are feisty & have some pretty amazing hot tempers. Not to mention, great ballers & great rivalries. I'm going to make a better effort to follow Serie A from now on. It's worth it.

  7. Emme says:

    Those Real Madrid boys practically gave me a heart attack, but three points is three points & I'll take it! Ok, did anyone notice in the group of fans taunting Cristiano that there was a guy with an umbrella and I swear to God, I thought he was going to throw it at him. What was with The Ramos……his BAMF side was definitely coming out. His temper is back and I kind of like it. That match was a little out of control.
    Don't think I am weird, but I kind of think Sami Khedira is getting really hot. His hair looks so silky and soft, he has beautiful olive skin, and a killer smile. He's just hot & pretty classy, too. I know he is not the classic Kickette hottie, but I think he deserves a chance :)

    • canederli says:

      I love, love, love Sami and it's growing daily after all the classy interviews. He seems like an utter doll.

      • Emme says:

        I'm glad I'm not the only one. His smile just melts my heart & he is very articulate and gracious. So happy Jose brought him and Mesut to Madrid. I think Sami will be the successor to Michael Ballack (who is a hall of fame GQMF) as Germany's next hot, classy guy. Real Madrid has one classy midfield with him and Xabi.

  8. Winnie Mata says:

    Chelsea must be delusional if they think they're going to win the league with performances like that -.-
    i swear everybody is on Special K. i'm serious.

    anyhoo, at least Arsenal's benefiting from their failures.

  9. caitanya says:

    My two cents:

    1) Yay RM! Yay Gozalo! looooooove him!
    2) Yay Atletico! Yay Diego! looooooove him!
    3) I can't help it–i am still a tad shocked at myself but i find myself more and more drawn/attracted to Ibra every time i see him!! There is something about his stature and he just exudes … manliness! I'm so much happier he's not on Barça anymore (:-P, sorry girls, i'm a madridista). Now i can watch him without the ill feeling in my stomach when i see those burgundy and blue colours! omg yummmmmmmmmmmmm

    • Skye says:

      Nice to see you don't get ill at the sight of Atleti, considering they're RM's arch-rivals too- Diego Forlan's godliness is not to be denied, though!

    • senora ramos says:

      lol. i think your the 1st atleti/rm fan i've ever seen!

  10. DeeRoma says:

    I was happy Roma came away with a point. I knew the game against Juventus would be a hard fought contest. So proud of my boys as usual!

  11. DeeRoma says:

    I'm happy for you too!

  12. senora ramos says:

    ok, how on earth did i miss sergio action?! was it the 1st half…b/c i was kind of watching but also doing homework. DAMMIT!!!
    well done to my boys. sporting…well, you're not on my christmas list and we'll leave it at that.
    congrats arsenal.disappointed in america :(

  13. Violets says:

    Oh, Kickette, how can you mention Borussia M.Gladbach and attractive players without mentioning Michael Bradley (…or the fact that he scored the game winner)?

    I, for one, spent my Saturday running around my apartment and screaming about the fact that Stu Holden scored his first EPL goal.

  14. @DebStimson says:

    I was so very happy for him! 2 goals and the assist on the other. And Kun's recognition to Forlan for his spectacular cross that set up Kun's goal was touching. Of course, living in the US, I don't see most of what's in the Spanish press but I can only imagine Forlan's been catching a lot of grief lately for not scoring, so that was especially nice of Kun to give Forlan the credit for that goal in front of the fans.

    • gi0ia says:

      Way too much grief! :-( And you know what I found was worst? All the time they were counting the number of matches he did not score, yet they failed to recognise that he was substituted earlier and earlier , sometimes even started the match on the bench and, on several occasions, only featured for 25 or 30 min of a match! I so felt for him, and I so felt for him when he scored that first goal on Saturday. You could see that huge amount of pressure coming off…

  15. Skye says:

    To any fangirls who would like to linger over the magnificence that is Iker, Sergio, Xabi, Pipita et al, here is a post laden with gifs from RM v. Sporting Gijón (looks like there were some fighting words and gestures used, and Mou sat out this game because he is still suspended). Bonus: gifs of Iker catching a wadded-up ball of newspaper, Xabi being Mr Too-Hot-To-Live, and Sergio's butt cheek, here-…

  16. Skye says:

    second time I'm posting it in this thread, but THERE IS A GIF OF IT (!!!!)…

    Una really is the best.

  17. Marika says:

    And I have to comment about Ibra`s tummy and thighs – very hot. Funny picture as so many times before.

  18. Marika says:

    I am so happy for Ibra and for Milan too. Real team work I might say. I think it was quite nice thing to do from Ibra not to celebrate the goal too much in front of his former home audience.

    • Sergo says:

      But he did celebrate it. He looked mighty cocky, raised his hands and stared right at them. The fact that he didn't runt around doesn't make him a saint. :P

  19. Leya_S says:

    Mario Gomez is smart – lifting up your shirt does not earn a yellow card! It's a win-win!

    Gunners: Happy we won!
    HOWEVER, Cesc, my darling, I love you…but I thoroughly dislike seeing you whine on the field. Please don't anymore, it kind of bothers me.
    Could not believe when I found out Chelsea went down to Sunderland!
    I was bummed that Villans let a 2-0 victory slip, and stunned that Man.U. managed to turn a 2-0 loss into a 2-2 tie in like 7 minutes…not that I like them, but that's still pretty impressive.

  20. Niina says:

    I totally agree! Any theories what had happened to his own pants and why he only changed into them after the game had started?!? Not complaining though, always nice to see dat ass :)

    Also, great reflex action on Iker's part when someone threw a newspaper ball at him…

    • MadridistaJenn says:

      He was actually wearing Pepe's (extra) shorts on accident. I hope this happens again and again and again.

  21. diana says:

    Yeyy i am so happy for Milan!What a great to open a new week :)
    On a side note, isn't Mario Gomez on fire lately ?

  22. Lotte (Zlatanista) says:

    I'm happy you're happy, and I'm HAPPY TOO!! :)

    • Rossanera says:

      … we must thank the great land of Sweden for the lovely scoring machine they have bequeathed us.

      I really like the word bequeath, FYI. Favourite old-fashioned fancy legal term.

      • Lotte (Zlatanista) says:

        I'm happy to have with the mighty swede ;) . It's a pleasure, I assure you, to see Zlatan in this form! Forza Milan!!

  23. Lotte (Zlatanista) says:

    This weekend was almost perfect! Arsenal won, Sevilla won and Barca WON! Messi is unbelievable!

    And icing on the cake: so many Swedes scoring!! Toivonen for PSV, Elmander for Bolton (fantastic!) and last, but certainly not least: ZLATAN! Yay, Milan on top!

  24. noelle says:

    the real madrid game was intense, but im glad they won….. sergio was amazing as always and his thighs r amazing lol, thank god for tvo and hd tv =)…. oh and heres a cute clip of iker from the game, a fan throwing balls of paper at him….. his reaction is adorable

    • @DebStimson says:

      hmmm…not sure why someone gave you a thumbs down on this post? :

      Thanks for the link. I saw that in the game but it's great to watch it again. Loved the glare that Iker gave the guy. He SO wanted to throw the paper straight back at the fan. Would have loved to see if the fan flinched!

  25. Summer says:

    This morning my Chemistry's professor entered in class, saw the blackboard (On it was written "Ibrahimovic ti amo"), and said "The next time I'will see a things like it I put a 4 to everybody" and added "I hate Milan, but I've not still understood if i'm more interista or more anti Milan"…And I said to him "It's hard mister to accept the defeat!" and he just smiled (because he's a fantastic man)….Congratulation Rossanera, when Milan won yesterday I've immediately thought about you :)

  26. gin_in_teacups says:

    Not the greatest weekend. Such a disappointing performance from Liverpool, I just have to content myself with the fact that Arsenal beat Everton. Also I had this conversation while watching the match in a pub:
    Old Man: Who do you think is going to win?
    Self: Arsenal
    Old Man: You an Arsenal fan than?
    Self: No, Liverpool
    Old Man: You know where Everton are from don't you?
    Self: Yes, Liverpool.
    Old Man: Why aren't you rooting for them then?
    Self: I think you know the answer to that question.
    He was being cheeky in kind of an adorable way, but he was definitely also trying to trip me up. Cuz I'm a girl, so I obviously don't really know about football.

    On the bright side, Real pulled off a down to the wire win and HOLY GOD SERGIO THIGH AND BUTT CHEEK! Whoever was working the camera was clearly sharing my brain because they were in love with Sergio.

    • lorena_yGp says:

      Ohhhh…..don't let me started on girl-subject- my personal favorites are:
      1) You must be a fan of Man.Utd because of CR,right?!
      2) Can you name me 5,no no no just 3 players from Man.Utd ( beside CR and Rooney ) ?!
      and my favorite:

      • gin_in_teacups says:

        HATE THAT SO MUCH! "Oh so you just like Fernando Torres then?" Ummmm no that's not really it at all. And I get the CRon thing all the time when I talk about Real, and I've never been into Cris.

        LOL I HOPE someone asks me to name the players on Liverpool. I've never had the pleasure of being able to throw it back in their faces that I can name the entire squad.

        • lorena_yGp says:

          HAHAHAHA as you said it – the pleasure to throw it back in their faces!!! Ohhh yes I've done it couple of times :-) And favorite moment is when I ask them-do you wish the list of players by their jersey number or position!? :-) )) Face they made….it's priceless!!! :-)

          • @DebStimson says:

            hahaha…good for you ladies! I had a Liverpool fan (male) add me on FB after I posted on the Fernando Torres page. He then posts something on my wall in response to an article that I shared on my wall about Real Madrid. Something to the effect of only liking football for the men. Had to set him straight on why I watch football. But I also get a lot of crap about not knowing anything about football since I'm from the US. *rolls eyes*

            • Rossanera says:

              … annoyance: watching the Milan derby with a bunch of Italian expats at the Globe and someone comes in, sits down and demands that they put the sound back to the Bears game.

              HOW ABOUT NO.

        • Skye says:

          Amen, sister. I find it particularly annoying since I've been into football as a little kid, and it was just disgusting to hit my teens and suddenly get hammered with "so you only like it because of the boys, RIGHT?" immaturity, and people trying to prove a point by asking about the off-side rule or asking whether you like Cristiano/Beckham and that's why you watch (no!!!).

      • Dru says:

        This isn't to suggest that I don't appreciate the boys of football, heaven knows I do, but I think the game is more beautiful than even the hottest of its players. And I think we all believe that too.

    • Skye says:

      gifs of Sergio's butt cheek and other Real players being cute/UNF-worthy here:…

      Your old man sounds like a cheeky chappie all right!

    • Sergo says:

      That happens to me all the time. I hate it when i'm in a big discussion online and they actually respect my opinion, until they click my profile and see that i'm a girl. Most of them are like "oh never mind, you're just a girl hahahaha" – knobheads.

  27. LuvinBale says:

    Great weekend!!!
    Bale was on fire and the boys looked like the team I know and love. Bales goals were just fantastic!
    His first goal was a header and just brilliant and the second he just slid into the lower corner. How can you not love him?
    Pav finally redeemed himself after a horrible miss from his first attempt then his shit penalty kick. Ugh!!!
    We could have been 6-2 by the end if he would have mad both goals.
    Then Sunderland beats Chelsea 3-0 on their home turf!!! I. LOVED. IT.
    Great weekend!

    Next up- Arsenal. We need another win- bad.

  28. littlegirl says:

    i'm happy for you.really!

  29. nooneinparticular says:

    well you forgot to mention the fabulous assist by Yoann Gourcuff for the Pied goal.

  30. Summer says:

    INTER LOST YESTERDAY (so so so happy for this) AND I'M ALSO HAPPY TO SAY….INTER LOST IN SPITE OF MY CHEMISTRY'S PROFESSOR (His name is Orazio and this is an other thing that make me laugh)…A great Milan and Ibra!!!Thank you Boys!!

  31. chefdi says:

    The Milan derby was my highlight ~ Sandro Nesta was lying on the pitch near the end for a shot I was sure I'd see here this a.m but what can I say, you did good with the Ibra shot, thank you!

  32. Missy Manchester says:

    Danny Welbeck is doing United proud! His solid performance in the Sunderland game was *much* appreciated by SAF and the home front.

  33. Jayde says:

    Happy that Real is still on top of La Liga, and seeing Sergio's thigh made it just that much better, truly.

  34. @AgnesWonka says:

    I think CR needs to get used to the new boots maybe

  35. Dru says:

    Uhuhuhuuuuuuuuuuu *cries* why does Liverpool break my heart so, WHY????

  36. AnnaBlume says:

    My Bundesliga highlight of the week: Mats Hummels wet and shirtless

  37. blake2108 says:

    I went to Villa v United. And it was amazing. Best game I've ever been to. I won't ramble on as I usually do, but it was a great second half, and to see Marc Albrighton (second and right behind Gareth Bale in my personal "rankings") in the flesh for the first time, and then scoring his first goal in front of the Holte End, was an amazing to be a part of. The atmosphere there was great too, and actually wanted Villa to win, felt very sorry for them when United equalised. The ref had a poor game too.

    And then I came home to find out Gareth had scored a brace, which I was obviously delighted about. :D

    So, yeah, content with this weekend's results.

  38. Thea says:

    Well done Barca!!!

  39. Very dodgy performance from my United boys at Villa Park but two goals from Kiko (The Slayer of Villans) and Nemanja salvaged a point. But seriously, draws are going to get us nowhere fast. Sort it out, boys!

    As far as other results go, I can only quote Darren Bent's tweet yesterday: Ha'way the lads lol

    • lorena_yGp says:

      I was really hoping ( when Kiko entered) that we will have another comeback like THE ONE in 2009!!! :-) from 2:0 to 2:3 :-) Yeah but games like that are one in 100…or in Man.Utd case-one in 10 :-) ))