November 14th, 2011

Weekend Results: Lunacy & Lessons Learned

Wow. JT’s only been benched for a game and already Frank has found a new BFF. Will his former bezzie cope? Image: Alex Livesey/Getty Images Europe.

Bad news. Due to a series of unexpected international friendly results at the weekend, the ‘Kickette Betting for Beverages’ budget has taken a massive hit.

That means that today’s editorial meeting will be fuelled by coffee. Not the morning mimosa mayhem we rely on.

We’re not optimistic as to the quality of our output today.

Mexico 2-0 Serbia

Cheech scoring a goal in an international is hardly news, but it does offer us an opportunity to post a picture of him  for you to perv on. We can but oblige. Image: AP Photo/Christian Palma.


Wales 4-1 Norway

Despite taking part in a great victory for their country, Gareth Bale & Aaron Ramsey were targeted by Welsh fans for their recent dalliance with Team GB. Right or wrong, Kickettes? Image: AP Photo/Jon Super.


South Africa 1-1 Ivory Coast

Further confirmation (if it were needed) that the African nations are world leaders when it comes to using football kits as a means to attract a ‘wider’ audience to the game.  Image: Richard Huggard/Gallo Images/Getty Images.


France 1-0 USA

Uh huh. You see, Clint looks hot here. But imagine how much more hot he would look if his jersey was skintight and slightly damp. Ahem. Excuse us for a moment. Image: Mike Hewitt/Getty Images Europe.


England 1-0 Spain

Ooh, and maybe cropped at the waist too. That would also be an unexpected result. Image: Shaun Botterill/Getty Images Europe.


Ukraine 3-3 Germany

We figure that Germany, and particularly Dennis Aogo, weren’t expecting such a comprehensive examination by Ukraine. Image: SERGEI SUPINSKY/AFP/Getty Images.


Denmark 2-0 Sweden

Like Barcelona, Denmark also suffers from a dearth of decent hairdressers. Image: AP Photo/Polfoto, Lars Poulsen.


Poland 0-2 Italy

Giampaolo Pazzini’s goal celebration is rumoured to be a message to Luca Toni. Aside from being slightly disturbed, we are also devastated that it isn’t, as we suspected, a message to us. Image: AP Photo/Michael Sohn.


Crikey, that was a struggle. It must be happy hour now, surely? While we’re sorting that out, why don’t you fill us in on what you loved and/or hated about the weekend’s international footy?

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41 Responses to “Weekend Results: Lunacy & Lessons Learned”

  1. [...] Weekend Results: Lunacy & Lessons Learned ( [...]

  2. DrStrangelove says:

    Also, WHAT is Gareth Bale feeding that thing? Jeeeeebus.

  3. MrsLBaines says:

    Jags is super friendly with everyone. Glad to see my Everton studs get along with Super Frank!

  4. Gareth Bale says:

    Gareth Bale is amazing !!

  5. LuvinBale says:

    Saw the England vs Spain game and I have to say that both teams played well but i was a little bored by the second half. What happened to Spain the second half?

    Wales vs Norway was amazing!!! I thought Wales looked amazing! And the last two goals were done in under a minute?! WOW!
    I watched it on ESPN3 and it was all in Spanish. GOOOOOOOOAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLL! hahaha loved it.

    Plus there were tons of close ups on Gareth Bale during and after the game. Garthe waved to the cameras and clapped for the fans- just love that boy! I die!

  6. Agnes Wonka says:

    So good for England and Denmark!!! ssooooooo bad for Argentina! I mean, what's wront with that team?!

    I'm so proud of Uruguay and Luis Suarez!!!! he deserved to be named in this post, he is a genious!!!!

  7. xoWinnie says:

    i bitched and moaned about this during the last world cup,
    and i'm not even an England fan. in addition to being sexy as hell,
    Joe Hart is PHENOMENAL in net. he should have been their
    i knoe many argued that he wasn't ready, but he proved himself during qualifiers
    when given a chance, i don't think there was any reason
    for him not to rise to the occasion again.
    the English NT will see great results when they let go of their
    habit of side-lining young, up-and-coming players for the older,
    more well-known generations of footballers.

    i know in the end, football is still a business and people are still going
    to go out and buy the typical Lampard, Rooney, Ferdinand jerseys,
    but this team has the potential to be very dangerous in up-coming tournaments
    it would be very interesting to see them exploit that.

  8. Gladys says:

    OMG, Kickette! That last comment…f-ing hilarious.

    Missed out on seeing always lovely (even when they lose) Spain (awww), but I did watch Croatia beat Turkey. (Woohoo!) Beautiful goal from Corluka, of all people, and really amazing defending. Man, I wish Barca could clear the ball like that, though the Croatian NT does have a distinct height advantage.

  9. Anju says:

    The game was awesome, hats off to Capello for putting together a good defense and the players were good too! I was pretty surprised that Spain couldn`t manage to score…Hopefully they pick up soon…

  10. IrishBlue says:

    Hmph. Hello??????? I realise these are all friendly results, in which case there better be a Euro 2012 playoff post on the way for me to show my happiness in……4-0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • DebS says:

      I didn't see the game but they kept updating the scores in the game I was watching. Well done Ireland!

    • Miss Lampard says:

      Trapattoni is HILARIOUS…"Don't say the cat…", he translated our italian phrase "Non dire gatto se non ce l'hai nel sacco", GENIUS!!

      • IrishBlue says:

        What does that phrase mean? Trapattoni has got a lot of criticism over here and it's completely unfair. Some say that his Italian style of play is boring, dull, whatever. If we even tried to play 'tippy-tappy' fancy football like Spain, we would never win. He's clever, he knows the teams capabilities and has made us into a team that is tough to beat. He doesn't deserve the stick he gets, I like him as a manager.

        • Miss Lampard says:

          That's good absolutely. Italian football and its peculiarity of playing with a tactics based of a strong-imponent defense have always had got a lot of criticism, but however with this tactics Italy won 4 World Cup, this has always been a characteristic of us Italians and you can see them in the managers who trains abroad. Trapattoni, it's not different, and his style of play even could be boring but obviously it's very brilliant at last. He's also a very particular man, very funny in some ways, the phrase "Don't say the cat.." has always been one of his typical expressions, it's an italian phrase that I think that doesn't exist in english, in few words he wanted to say that you cannot speak about a determined thing, about an objective before that you have accomplish it. Do you understand now??

  11. Rosey says:

    I actually got to watch a game and I watched the USA v France game and it was good but the a-hole that flashed a laser pointer in Tim Howard's needed to be punched in the face.

    P.S. Tim Howard did an AWESOME save!

    • DebS says:

      Howard was awesome! Yeah, the laser thing is childish. Seems to happen in way too many games. CR7 & Messi are frequent targets. Event the announcers commented on it. :

      • xoWinnie says:

        ugh, the abuse Ronaldo puts up with at opposing stadiums is atrocious!
        i don't know how he deals with it. i know he lost his sh1t at practice a few days ago,
        poor dear. but seriously, it's one thing to harass a player during a game
        but at practice? seriously? leave him the f*ck alone!

  12. Miss Lampard says:

    I don't know if this week has been better seeing England win against Spain, see my delicious boy Frankie scoring and proud of his arm brand or see the other half with a pure sexy pic of SEXY-RAMOS with his perfect abs taken in the tunnel by the cam…Interesting, absolutely interesting!!…

    • DebS says:

      ty for the video link <3

      If England had to score, I was glad it was Frank. Hopefully, that means he's answered his critics about whether he should still be on England's team, blah, blah, blah.

  13. Maria V says:


    Aren't 4 goals by Luis Suarez news?? Please kickettes!! :(

  14. Kat22 says:

    As much as I was rooting for Spain (being German myself, with a Scottish/Irish better half I'm allowed to), I was happy for Frank when he scored. He has been getting so much stick recently and every man and his dog has been saying he's past it, so I'm sure it gave him an incredible boost to score the only goal of the game.

    On a sidenote, I do kind of feel sorry for Pepe Reina. He doesn't get the chance to be in goal very often and every time he does, Spain concede. I don't think it was his fault either.

    • DrStrangelove says:

      In fairness, that was basically Darren Bent's goal in all but match report. Lampard nodded into an open goal from an excellent header which was deflected.

      We did very well, but I thought Spain looked incredibly lacklustre by their standards. Iniesta did nowt, Xavi was unconvincing. A very poor performance from Spain.

      But anyway, we'll see what happens tommorow against Sweden. :/

  15. Sarah, Madrid says:

    I blame result on Cesc' hair, the ridiclious thing on his head get go, even his teammates on th bench don't want talk to him ( yeah yeah I saw it :p).

    Anyway, Congrats England for winning the game, good defending, Capello is a mastermind when it comes to defense, thumbs up.

    I feel bad for Argentine,

    • Kat22 says:

      Lol! I gave you a thumbs-up for the Cesc comment – his hair is ridiculous!

    • Anna says:

      Are you serious ?

    • April says:

      I concur… his hair is just… wow (does he try to copy Nando and Ramos?). It seems to be growing into his brain too, because while he was certainly trying when he was on the pitch, he wasted some corners that I honestly feel Mata should have taken (he's shorter and Cesc could better compete for a header off a corner kick), and he seemed to fancy himself striker for the evening rather than supplying them. I don't have a problem with creative players taking shots on goal when they're in the position and no one else is, but he didnt take his opps when he was the only one, and wasted some where he had support. He wasn't the only one doing that though. I like the Spain NT a lot (and especially while the USMNT is "working" stuff out, I've adopted Spain), but sometimes it rather frustrates me how they prefer to use their strikers and wingers for opening up the defense specifically for the midfielders. There were some key runs that Villa and Nando made or started to make, and I would see someone pass it to another midfielder in a tight space with a bunch of tiny 1-2's that led to nothing… meanwhile a couple of the forwards might be standing in wide open spaces that only require a nice chip or crafty through pass.

      Other than that, there were some erroneous offside calls, but this goes to show that possession football doesn't always yield results. This was a game that required a faster counter attack behind the square defense. Sometimes parking the bus works… frustrating and boring as it can sometimes be, a good defense doesn't necessarily win games, but it doesn't lose them!

      Also, felt bad for Reina… he didn't need to dive for the initial shot, but he got no help from the team on the rebound. And while I was happy for Frank, I really do hope Bent actually gets more recognition for that chance he seems to be receiving. That makes, what… 3 headers for Frankie's last goals? Was sort of funny because it was in an awkward location for a header, but Lampard does dedicate himself to the header once he's made his mind up (thinking of his goal against Blackburn too).

      • Sarah, Madrid says:

        I know, that 's exactly my first thought he is trying to copy Ramos, ( I even joked with my friends about it, when Ramos get a yellow, seconds later cesc got one:p)!
        Anyway, I thought Spain will be facing the defensive style that England played with, they need this 9, negerdo, soldado, in front to take advantage of this water mouthing passes from Xavi, xabi, iniesta to finish it, villa is a more like a winger, being used as a winger, I remember when busquets get a beautiful pass from xabi, I could imagine if it was a pure striker it could hit the net. I felt for pepe too, definitely not his fault, it was that no one was covering left post, they needed some of "iker angry screaming insults" about that goal.

        • DebS says:

          I wonder if they would have been better off playing with either of the Fernandos from the beginning? England just had too much height at the back and were great at picking off the short passes. A little more height in the forward position would have given Spain more options to get the ball in the 6 yd box.

          Felt bad for Pepe. Poor guy finally gets some playing time and his defense lets him down. Xabi, what the heck were you doing?? That was your man!!! That really shocked me that it was Xabi that left him open (or at least didn't move to cover him) when I saw the replay. Xabi's so on top of everything.

          I really like Jordi Alba. He seems to fit right in to the team and is doing well.

          • April says:

            Agree on Jordi… I was sad that Alvaro Dominguez didn't get another chance, but he may not have impressed in training as much as Jordi. Good to know they have some options available for their backline.

            Was surprised with Xabi too.. not sure if he just didn't read it (especially with his lack of caring for Lampard much, would have figured he'd track the heck out of him) or if it was his admitted slowness. Appears he didn't much try though.

            Soldado didn't have that much luck against Chelsea, who didn't even park the bus. Not sure he would have picked apart the defense in this case either. He does well in La Liga, but I don't think that Spanish and English D's are much alike, so can't say I'd have put him in this game. Haven't watched enough Negredo, but he had the height. Of the players that were actually there and available, I'd have definitely tried a Fernando from the beginning. Either of them would have connected better with Xabi earlier on. Mata is great at chipping for the taller guys too, so he would have worked nicely on the wing from the beginning, I think. I prefer him on the left though, like he mostly plays for Chelsea.

            • Sarah, Madrid says:

              I forget about llorente and mata. I don'tthink Torres is playing as number 9 anymore. I think if Torres is worth calling, soldado is, soldado is a good striker, but he has this problem of being inconsistent, one game he will miss easy sitters, the next he will be scoring beautiful goals, but as I already forget to mention llorente is the most reliable 9 that Espana have now, in this game in particular Espana needed a player who cut into offside traps, we all know villa is not the guy for it, I think it may be one of problems facing VDB in next games.

              • Kat22 says:

                I read some comments on a Spanish website (I think it was marca?) and a lot of people seem to think it's unfair that Torres keeps getting selected over Llorente, Soldado and Negredo.

                • April says:

                  It comes up a lot. Honestly, I think that Torres getting called up for these games were sort of a final test before they really get into the Euros. VDB might also know something we don't… he seems to suggest "he is one of us" or "he's an important player for us" in a number of ways… maybe he does something for the rest of the guys there. I dunno. Maybe Soldado wouldn't fit in? I have no idea what the thoughts are in VDB's head, but despite the current condition of Torres, he has never really excelled in VDB's Spain NT… I think the style of play doesn't suit well to his strengths, so I won't be surprised to see him lose his place on the team, but I won't be delighted about it either.

                  Negredo has been getting call ups but he was injured, so that is likely the only reason he wasn't picked this go-round. Llorente consistently gets called up, but for whatever reason, gets little playing time. Regardless, VDB doesn't really use a typical #9, so if Llorente went in, he may get a similar treatment to Torres. The taller dudes just aren't the focal point of the attack on that team. For this particular game, I think they ought to have been. Headers are popular in England for a reason.

                  • Kat22 says:

                    I remember when Spain played Scotland in the Euro qualifiers last September (?) and Llorente came on and scored two great goals in quick succession. I think they were both headers, but not sure.

                • Sarah, Madrid says:

                  Torres is country icon, he was the main reason why Spain won the first tittle ever, I think it is more emotional call up, but Torres in sense of performance doesn't deserve to be called, after a while he won't, just like Raul before him! Or or it is Ramos pressuring mister del Bosque into calling him :p

        • April says:

          Ha… I just remember his terrible mullet phase too… though admittedly, I can't recall if Nando or Cesc came first with that.