March 5th, 2012

Weekend Results: You’re Doin’ It Wrong


If Franck Ribery’s panties are an indication of things to come this week, we’re afraid.

Let’s cheer ourselves up with a quick look at what else footballers got horribly wrong this weekend, shall we?


Man on man face-rubbing. Image: Laurence Griffiths/Getty Images.

Chelsea’s 1-0 defeat vs. West Brom at the Hawthorns is the fixture they’re all talking about, but other stuff happened in the EPL too. Arsenal are now only four points behind Spurs after beating Liverpool 2-1 at Anfield, while their North London rivals were defeated by a Wayne Rooney and Ashley Young inspired Manchester United. United are now two points behind Manchester City, who despite Mario Balotelli’s alleged overnight adventure beat struggling Bolton 2-0 to remain top.

An honorable mention must go to Fulham, who thrashed Wolves 5-0 via a Pavel Pogrebnyak hat-trick and another two for Clint Dempsey, who now has ten for the season. Not bad, but RvP has an “insane” twenty-five EPL goals to his name and shows no sign of slowing down. Just so you know.


La Liga

Tackling. Image: RAFA RIVAS/AFP/Getty Images.

If you’re looking for tension and intrigue in football, La Liga is not the place to be right now. Real Madrid maintained their ten point lead over second placed Barcelona with a 5-0 win over Espanyol, while Pep Guardiola’s men beat Gijon comfortably enough, despite the absence of a suspended Leo Messi.

Valencia have had a patchy run of late, but look safe enough in third after a 1-0 away win at Granada. They are six points clear of closest rivals Athletic Bilbao, who beat Real Sociedad 2-0 and are up to fourth, but on goal difference alone. Malaga are fifth, having beaten Getafe 3-1.


Serie A

Playing football. Image: AP Photo/Antonio Calanni.

Inter finally broke their horrible run of league defeats with a 2-2 draw vs. Catania. Late goals from the Diegos of Forlan and Milito snagged a point for the Nerazzurri, offering under-fire coach Claudio Ranieri a small reprieve – although if we were him we wouldn’t be making any major office refurbishment plans.

Ibra has been suspended for the last three games after slapping Napoli’s Salvatore Aronica’s face, but issued another battering on his return with a fourteen minute hat-trick against Palermo. Milan are now three points clear of Juve, who failed to beat Chievo at home, while Lazio’s 2-1 win over ten-man Roma saw them hop into third. Udinese are fourth after a 0-0 home draw with eleventh placed Atalanta.



Getting your kit off for the Kickette crew. Image: AFP PHOTO / GUENTER SCHIFFMANN.

Borussia Monchengladbach’s 1-1 draw with Hamburg last week was not just a blip, people. This week, the league high-fliers lost 1-0 to Nuremburg and are holding onto third spot by the skin of their teeth. Fourth placed Schalke’s 2-1 shock defeat to seventeenth placed Freiburg did them a favour, but Bayer Leverkusen’s unexpected 2-0 win over Bayern Munich kept them in the mix for the top four too. Bayern are now seven points behind league leaders Borussia Dortmund, who beat Mainz 2-1.

It might be crap for the players, but we love a bit of mayhem and intrigue in our end of season run-in. You?


Ligue 1

Letting an opponent know that you admire and respect his commitment to Kickette’s Thigh-Off contest. Image: JEFF PACHOUD/AFP/Getty Images.

Montpellier’s 1-1 draw with Dijon plus Paris St Germain’s 4-1 win over Ajaccio was enough for the latter to snatch top spot from their rivals, but Mont-P shouldn’t abandon their hopes for the title just yet. Third placed Lille drew 2-2 with Auxerre, leaving them seven points adrift of second and with a mountain to climb if they stand any chance of retaining the title.

Rennes moved into the Europa League spot with a 2-0 win over Lorient, but St Etienne, Toulouse and Lyon all dropped out of European contention – St Etienne and Lyon losing to Evian Thonon Gaillard and Nancy respectively, while Toulouse beat Marseille 1-0 and still fell to sixth. Which sucks for them.


Right, having shown we can face the unpleasant truth about football, we’re now ready for some nice things to happen.

Hello, Fate? Are you listening?

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21 Responses to “Weekend Results: You’re Doin’ It Wrong”

  1. Kat22 says:

    What is it with Ribery's underwear?? o_O Although the pair of shorts in that picture don't beat the monstrosity that was the pink/brown flowery horrible thing, they do come close.

    Enjoyed the Liverpool Arsenal game. Szczęsny's double save during the penalty shoot was fantastic!

    Oh, and the third pic is quality. :-)

  2. RealFan7 says:

    Great game by Madrid, the whole team played well!! Kaka had an amazing night (loved his dedication to his wife). I also loved watching CR try to set up Morata for his first goal. Great save by Casilla(how confusing). Anyone know what CR and Marcello's goal celebration was?? Job well done boys. Keep up the good teamwork….Hala Madrid!!

  3. nayet21 says:

    I love Real Madrid boys, they're so cute. I can´t help to smile when I see Gonzalo Higuain (and his back zone ;)

  4. liz1 says:

    <3 van persie

  5. futbolfan says:

    Yay for Cristiano(though it is expected)!
    Yaaaay for Pipita!
    Yaaaaaay For Sami!
    Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay for Kaka! He played AMAZING, God I love seeing him play well.

    And, well YAY for Real Madrid!

  6. Mrs. Q.Borri says:


    Btw is it to much to ask for a post of Victor Ruiz?? The hottie form Valencia, I know I can google it but a post from you guys will be so much better! ;) You know basics like: age, is he single, kids, etc.

    This was a another great weekend of soccer with amazing game and players!!

  7. Jayy says:

    Right Kickette, there was a potential young hottie out in the Madrid ranks during their 5-0 win on Sunday. Not a first team regular, but a young 'un.
    I dont know his name, nor his shirt number. All I know is that he looks like Xabi Alonso and Kaka's love child. Could you pretty pretty please find out who he is for me? I've been looking for some fresh meat. Loves!

  8. Gladys says:

    There's an exciting league in Spain this season and it's called Fourth Place. It's definitely true that the top three are decided, but the remaining Euro Cup spots are completely up for grabs. I predict a lot of pitch madness in the final weeks. (Can't imagine what's going to ensue if the refs keep behaving like they do.)

    • Sarah, Madrid says:

      I don't know about Valencia and third place, they are not doing great lately someone might challenge them for the third spot as well.
      Levante is trolling Liga, you know it took them until last week to win their first game of 2012, yet they are 4th in Liga still for reason teams didn't challenge them at all

  9. Loninha - Brasil says:

    Bayern Munich lost again and again Mario Gomez played badly, I'm worried about the beautiful brunette with gorgeous green eyes, he deserves a better stage than is presently experiencing, I'm afraid that Bayern did not renew with him! Super Mario kisses call me okay, I have two shoulders and two arms waiting to hold you and love you!! I love you!

  10. Kristina says:

    "…despite the absence of a suspended Leo Messi." And despite a red (!?) card for Pique and yet ANOTHER uncalled penalty. It must be the season of uncalled penalties for Barca. I'm impressed by them for not losing their moral. If it was me I would have jumped up and down, screaming bloody murder! But, I'm not paid zillions of dollars to kick a ball around so I just take it out on the furniture. Golazo by Keita and a another stunning performance from beautiful Andres!

    Also so happy for Arsenal (sorry Liverpool fans)! And Man U! That was a strange game. Sevilla seems to finally be on their way. All is well.

    • Sarah, Madrid says:

      why do you think the reason is? :)

      • Kristina says:

        Bad luck? :)

        • Sarah, Madrid says:

          Oh ok!I do believe it is beyond bad luck now, I didn't watch a liga game so far with no blatant wrong decision (regardless going aginst my team or to us)! For example vela goal for scociedad in basque game whereas ball pass the line and yet linesman didn't even see it..
          Seville wrongly disallowed goal as well for non existing offside that cost them 3 point vs you could say a direct rivalry in liga, I know people are merely focused on Madrid and barcelona! However other clubs in liga are suffering as well, but no one seems to pay attention to it, since they are not big enough..

          • Kristina says:

            I saw the Sevilla game, and believe me I noticed. I don't understand the ref's in La liga… How can they differ so much from the ones in other leagues? Well, I'm not gonna dwell on the subject, it doesn't help but I definitely think it's an important issue. The ref's are not supposed to influence a game in the way that these do. I can totally accept a mistake here and there, but it's starting to get ridiculous. It's not good for those who benefits from it either, because their win will be taunted in peoples eyes. It's not good and fair for anyone, not the players, not the supporters and not for the sport itself.

    • RealFan7 says:

      You would have screamed bloody murder and jumped up and down. Isn't that what Pique did? Coming out and saying the red card was premeditated. Why did he approach the ref durring half time anyway? The guy got by him and had a clear scoring chance and Pique took him out…it's a red card. Barca doesn't cry about the refs, yet this season that is all they have done.

      • Kristina says:

        If you take your RM-glasses off you might see that the ref's in La liga are bad. There has been so many bad calls in every game so far, as your fellow Madridista Sarah pointed out. Not only in the Barca games. I do believe that the Barca players and their coach has been very calm about all this. At every press conference Pep gets the question about the ref's and he always says that "these things happens". He refuses to say anything about the ref's. You are so wrong when you say that Barca has whined the whole season. No one from the club has harassed any ref in any parking lot. It wasn't a Barca player that told the ref's to go celebrate with the other team. Pique got upset now. Of course, at one point or another you burst, because you've had too many bad calls against you.

        It's so bloody tiresome to discuss this because it hurts all the clubs in this Liga. The ref's are bad and it hurts
        everybody. Forget I said anything.

  11. IrishBlue says:

    My comments won't post anywhere :( boo.

  12. Sarah, Madrid says:

    I love Pochenpttino, he is one of my fav in liga, seeing him face palming on the bench made me sad, however seeing Higuain and his bootilicious getting the bernabeu standing ovation ( at least in my head his bitty was getting some praises as well) made me happy again, in your face Pipita doubters, Kaka perhaps played his best game with us since joining, being adorable as well doing it!! Morata morata morata getting his first appearance in liga, ozil, cristano weren't bad at all, what a beautiful game my babies!! How everyone trying to cheer Pipita by their post game statements, in the game!! We are one happy family!!
    Hala Madrid!!

    Arsenal, one word Van Persie!!! Is he for real :p?, iniesta take a bow you little magician, how can anyone doubt a side you are on, sorry yes I am a madridista, but iniesta magic madre mia!!!
    I actually love this weekend, it is a weekend when world of football remember there is more in this game than messi and cristano, other magician exist as well!