August 6th, 2009
Welcome to the Club: Yolanthe Cabau Van Kasbergen
That rhythm clearly doesn’t work when you’re caught swapping spit by CCTV in a car park. Not to worry.
Yesterday Wesley (finally) publicly professed his feelings for his new lady.
Thus, we are ready to more formally acknowledge and accept this new, fully-fledged WAG into the club. See if you can remember her name: Yolanthe Cabau Van Kasbergen.
Now look away and repeat. Might take some practice.
To recap: Sneijder and his wifey Ramona married in 05; birthed an adorable son Jessey in ’06 and promptly divorced in ’09. Pics of the non-discreet Wesley and Yolanthe were treated like an all-you-can-eat buffet by the Dutch press, forcing the still-attached “other woman” and her main man Jan to issue a joint press release announcing their split. Most recently Wes and Yolanthe were spotted vacationing in Spain, and so forth.
We’re truly astonished at the lack of time it takes to develop a girl crush. In fact, we blame her hair. It looks ready to throw down and challenge Leo Messi’s gal for the most lust-worthy locks title. We’re waiting in the wings if they need judges. Or conditioner-applier assistants.
To cope with her parents’ ineptitude at baby-naming we’re opting for a swift upgrade to supercouple status a la Brangelina. Help, us out here, Kickettes. Wesanthe? Sneijdabau? That’s catchy. Share your faves below.