October 31st, 2006
when dumbasses attack
It’s not easy being a random bloke in this world when such finery as Cristiano Ronaldo walk the earth amongst us lowly mortals.
For example, this idiotic jerkoff couldn’t handle it when his girlfriend said Cristiano was “gorgeous” and attacked her with a baseball bat. Quality guy, this.
He’s since been jailed for a year and a half, where we hope he enjoys many nights of affectionate cell-lovin from a tall, handsome Cristiano look-a-like, in for 10 years GBH.