February 3rd, 2011
Wrap It Up: Scarf Wranglers Amongst Us
While snoods have been must have fashion accessory for footballers this season, it seems that the sudden requirement for throat warmth is not confined to the pitch. Yes people, scarves are the new manbag, and festooning oneself with varying lengths of woolly or shiny (or in some horrifying cases, both) material is really catching on over on Planet Baller.
But, as is usual with these short lived crazes, there appears to be some confusion as to how to wear said garment. Outfits are made or broken by the shape of the drape and we are concerned that a players’ sex appeal (surely the most important consideration for a club when considering a purchase) may be irreparably damaged by an incorrectly applied neckerchief.
In our highly scientific survey we have selected a few recent scarf wranglers and critiqued their ensemble. Feel free to enjoy our thoughts, then answer this. Do you love a man in a muffler? Or should the trend be permanently benched?
The ‘Bish, please’ – Modelled By Pep Guardiola (top)
Too busy to muck about with drapery? The frippery of fashion too much to bear? Then you should be sporting the ‘Bish, please’ scarf. A totally functional garment, specifically designed for warmth and neck security in business-like muted tones, Pep is even too busy to ensure that the tell-tale label isn’t showing. It’s CP Company, famed for their low key luxe.
The Semi-Poncho – Modelled by Mesut Ozil
Mesut has a worrying history of straying into the costumery department in his search for couture. Who can forget his clown-related calamity? Shudder. And while we approached his recent shopping expedition ensemble with caution, we feel that his traditional drape shape plus hat is confusingly cute. Perhaps this casual cool stems from relief that he extricated himself from a romantic situ before it got messy? Or maybe he’s just running interference from a bad hair day (left).
Well, you would, wouldn’t you? (Image via starflash.de)
‘The Metrosexual Tramp’ - Modelled by David Beckham
Speaking of ‘running interference from a bad hair day’, please welcome David Beckham.
For a fashion icon to plunge to such hairy depths is traumatic to say the least, but we feel a well chosen, neatly tied scarf could distract from the fuzz and give our ailing libidos something to rest on. Well, we’ll never know now, will we?
We can only assume that in a gesture of brotherly love, D Becks let BFF Gary Neville tie his beige beastie for him. It’s the only explanation we’re prepared to countenance for this shambolic scarfery. (Reuters/Daylife)
The String – Modelled By Joe Cole
Serving no useful function whatsoever, ‘the string’ hangs limply from the neck, looks weird and offers little in the way of relief from Joe’s jacket. This is a man on his way up… to the local working men’s club for beer and pork scratchings. It is also the kind of fashion confusion that may encourage a fellow player to seek pastures new.
Fash hacks? It’s over to you.