May 14th, 2008

WTF Files: Become A WAG

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Without question, this is the absolute worst thing we have ever seen or heard or thought about in our entire lives.

The goal is to have this song (link below) released in time for Euro 2008.  Because England being out of the tourny obviously isn’t enough to hurt our feelings.

Link: Become a WAG


via The Spoiler

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61 Responses to “WTF Files: Become A WAG”

  1. Rusty says:

    Finally listened to the song. Neither interested nor offended. Meh.

    keyword: against22. I’m neither for nor against!

  2. FootballerChick43 says:

    I just played it for my sister.. and she says that this song is devastating to mankind. One might have thought that we have evolved into something more intelligent by now but… no. This song just proves that we are stuck.

    We need to nominate her for the Worst Song Ever Written.

  3. Avenath says:

    big surprise  ohh  grrr  gulp

    Holy mother of God!…i can’t believe i went from Paul Weller to THAT…i think i am forever scarred…

  4. I think I will be deaf. Voluntarily.

  5. I think I will be deaf. Voluntarily.

  6. Zatil says:

    lmao~
    this is probably the SILLIEST song i’ve ever heard!!

  7. Alexandra says:

    Yes, this song won’t win a Grammy, but I think it is brilliant! It is definitely spoofing WAGs

  8. Tres Bien says:

    I didn’t even bother clicking on the link. 

    An outfit like that doesn’t deserve my attention.

  9. Eva says:

    I don’t know who is worse the wannabe"singer” or wannabe"rapper”. This is my last post promise….

  10. Eva says:

    My ears won’t stop the bleeding… They’re forever contaminated.

  11. Eva says:

    My ears are bleeding. Hope everyone else is okay after hearing that!?!

  12. Lil' says:

    Rusty – You’re right,that’s why I said it, it means poor vocabulary, short sentences and no use of play on words => I could have written this song, well, maybe not…

    and is that just me or her boobs look really weird on the picture, or is it made on purpose?

  13. Lil' says:

    Rusty – You’re right,that’s why I said it, it means poor vocabulary, short sentences and no use of play on words => I could have written this song, well, maybe not…

    and is that just me or her boobs look really weird on the picture, or is it made on purpose?

  14. cheryl bites (Jos says:

    Rusty: worst bit:

    “Alex” (lobotomised Londoner): “Oaw, Stevie, you got yourself kicked out of Euro 2008! Now I can’t go shopping in – what’s it cawwled – Vienetta?“

    “Stevie” (ditto): “It’s VIENNA! You stupid… *mutter*“

  15. cheryl bites (Jos says:

    Rusty: worst bit:

    “Alex” (lobotomised Londoner): “Oaw, Stevie, you got yourself kicked out of Euro 2008! Now I can’t go shopping in – what’s it cawwled – Vienetta?“

    “Stevie” (ditto): “It’s VIENNA! You stupid… *mutter*“

  16. Rusty says:

    Lil’, since I remember your saying that English isn’t your first language, and I assume the song is in English, and you understand the song’s lyrics after hearing it only once, the song must be awful.

    I just ran over two miles and I’m heading back to the treadmill. I don’t want to listen to this song!

  17. cheryl bites (Jos says:

    Asma: I agree that it is rare for an outift like that to pass completely unsporked, but frankly there are so many awful things going on here that it didn’t even show up on the radar.

  18. cheryl bites (Jos says:

    Asma: I agree that it is rare for an outift like that to pass completely unsporked, but frankly there are so many awful things going on here that it didn’t even show up on the radar.

  19. Lil' says:

    wow I understood all the lyrics even if listened to it only once, and that is not a compliment, really …
    I think the chorus could be used for a radio jingle, reminds me of ads for supermarkets
    worst song I have heard for a long time,

  20. Lil' says:

    wow I understood all the lyrics even if listened to it only once, and that is not a compliment, really …
    I think the chorus could be used for a radio jingle, reminds me of ads for supermarkets
    worst song I have heard for a long time,

  21. natalie says:

    now i suppose that this was supposed to be funny but the comedy was just lost on me to be honest. it wasnt actually making me laugh whereas it could have actually been quite funny and im worried that now shes being serious

  22. Signora Maldini says:

    My eardrums are suing me for gross negligence and frankly, I don’t blame them.

    This sounds like something from a bad 80s workout video complete with metallic eyeshow, leggings and those leg warmer things.

  23. Asma:)CR7 says:

    I wish I never heard it either.  I hope it doesn’t catch on here. 

    I’m surprised no-one has commented on her outfit or is it that bad it doesn’t deserve any comments?  <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/gulp.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="gulp" style="border:0;" />

  24. Belle says:

    That’s an extremely wise decision Mrs. Xabi!!!!

    My curiosity got the better of me and now I’m down a life because that was the worst thing I think I have ever heard. I hope for the good of the world this song does not catch on with anyone, anywhere.

  25. Becca x says:

    What A Disgrace!
    I cant believe someone would actually make a song about it.
    well if thats what you can call it.
    It was soo bad, nether of them could sing to save their lives.
    Dont tourture yourselves girls!!

  26. MrsXabiAlonso says:

    I’m going to choose not to listen to this….!!

  27. rania says:

    after listening to that i am questioning my sobriety. was that real??? am i just super drunk?

  28. LittleRedTriangle says:

    there are no words for how horrible that is

  29. cheryl bites (Jos says:

    She looks like Gillian McKeith, doesn’t she? D: Maybe this is the next step in her singing career since she got kicked off Celebrity X Factor. The “quality” of the “singing” seems about right.

  30. cheryl bites (Jos says:

    She looks like Gillian McKeith, doesn’t she? D: Maybe this is the next step in her singing career since she got kicked off Celebrity X Factor. The “quality” of the “singing” seems about right.

  31. sarabee says:

    No Aoife, you dont. You really, really dont. Trust me. <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/blank.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="blank stare" style="border:0;" />

  32. Sarah x says:

    Dont Do It Johnna!!
    How PAthetic Is That??
    Sad Sad Little Girl.
    Im Sure a 5 Year Old Could Make A Better Song Than That!!
    I Say We Start A Hate Club Towards That SonG!!!

  33. FabLove says:

    Oh God, that’s the worst thing I’ve heard since, I don’t know.

    It’s so absurd, like I keep looking at the picture and being like OH GOD. People actually are like this!?

  34. Aoife says:

    Arrrgh I have to wait an hour until I can listen to it. It’s morbid curiosity girls. I have to hear it.

  35. Johnna says:

    I’m too scared to click on the link.

  36. Rusty says:

    Wow am I glad that I can’t listen to music here at the gym.

  37. cheryl bites (Jos says:

    *Deeply unimpressed* Nasty, isn’t it? “Let’s all laugh at WAGs, they’re stupid Cockney bimbos.“

    Two years late for that to be a cutting edge concept, dear. And it was profoundly unpalatable in the first place. (Plus, I can’t believe they haven’t noticed that Alex is a Scouser. But the only thing that could have made this worse would be fake Northern accents.)

  38. cheryl bites (Jos says:

    *Deeply unimpressed* Nasty, isn’t it? “Let’s all laugh at WAGs, they’re stupid Cockney bimbos.“

    Two years late for that to be a cutting edge concept, dear. And it was profoundly unpalatable in the first place. (Plus, I can’t believe they haven’t noticed that Alex is a Scouser. But the only thing that could have made this worse would be fake Northern accents.)

  39. Asma:)CR7 says:

    oh my god this is absolutely pathetic and desperate to be famous.

    seriously she can’t even sing

  40. Lains says:

    My ears are bleeding…
    But I’m dying of laughter.
    security: volume75 : )

  41. andrea says:

    sorry to go against the masses but I personally think the fact that its so bad makes it so good! its hysterical I think everyone needs to lighten up its quite obviously just a piss take.

  42. Elise says:

    Yeah, dude, there’s no way that’s for real.  There’s a lot of crap on the radio, but I just do not believe that anyone would really think they could get that released as a single.  It MUST be a joke.

  43. Dave says:

    I think it’s hilarious. I can’t believe you are all getting so worked up over it.

  44. PJ Allen says:

    I dont think it’s meant to be taken seriously, just a bit of fun.

  45. offside2207 says:

    It’s my first time posting here…and I kinda wish I had never ever clicked on that link.

    My three year old brother can sing better than that…which is pretty sad, considering he’s three.

    She sounds like a dying piglet.

    And now I have to go wash out my ears…and pray that the song stops running through my head soon.

  46. Somehow you just know his boxers are going to match his tie and her dress bag and shoes.

  47. Rusty says:

    TFO, do you use cheese or Cheez ™? A local restaurant makes great nachos with goat cheese and sundried tomatoes. (Crap, I’m still hungry.) But I don’t think they’d work on Nacho Novo.

    I really have to leave the gym lest I decide to get back on the treadmill and kill myself.

  48. Deanna says:

    <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/lol.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" /> 
    Oh my god, I can’t believe people waste their time making songs like that! Dear lord, I don’t think I’ve ever heard anything worse!

    I found the Alex-Stevie horrible imitation really cheap. I hope she gets sued and has to pay a lot of money. She deserves it, for making us listen to that!

    Oh no, I can’t get that irritating tune out of my head now! I need to go listen to something much nicer! Yes, I think I’ll go watch that video made by c9, I haven’t seen it yet.

  49. Just a brief open and that was all I needed. The horrible cheesy R & B vibe – crap-ola!

    I’ll never get those 2 seconds back again.

  50. Carefree says:

    That was awful.  I saw a link to this on another blog, I didn’t bother with it, then I saw it here and had to know how bad it was.

    Personally, I had to stop it at 0:36. 

    The only thing worse than the lyrics is her voice.

  51. FootballerChick43 says:

    My ears are bleeding.
    Seriously. Worst thing I’ve ever heard. And I go to church with someone whose known to literally crack a window with her voice. No joke.

    WHY?

  52. Asma:)CR7 says:

    Ok girls you are making me hungry for some nachos and I don’t mean Nacho Novo <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/confused.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="confused" style="border:0;" />

  53. c9 says:

    TFO- Spicy?? I love Spicy!! <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/smile.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="smile" style="border:0;" /> Some Mojitos would be great with that cheese and peppers <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/tongue_wink.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="tongue wink" style="border:0;" />

  54. Yep, I can confirm, he’s on the bench.  Will come on and score the winner.  Just wait and see.

  55. Asma:)CR7 says:

    TFO – my sis told me Novo isn’t playing just now and he is on the bench.

  56. QB says:

    this is just bad

  57. Sure, c9.  You know the motto:  The more gang, the bigger the bang.  I like a little jalapeno peppers on my Nacho too.  Spicy!!

  58. c9 says:

    Listened to it and am LMAO <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/lol.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="LOL" style="border:0;" /> Really, it’s nice to see people wasting their time to record something so worthless! I had to listen to it just so I could say I heard it and it’s “BLAH”  <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/blank.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="blank stare" style="border:0;" />

    TFO- Would you mind if Cris and I joined in for the cheese lick-off today?? Does sound so YUMMY!!

  59. Jesus, ladies.  Is it that bad?  I too am afraid to click on the link.  I think I’ll just pretend I never saw this thread and back away slowly. 

    The pic up above is pretty funny though.  Anyone else notice the Cricket bag?  And that line Cheryl quoted about Alex not being able to pronounce Vienna cracked me up.  Because you have to know that’s so true to life. 

    But forewarned is forearmed.  I suppose I owe you all some thanks.  I’ll go back to my pile of office work now, and keep an eye on the Rangers/Zenit game streaming on my ‘puter.  Nacho Novo makes me want to pour warm melted cheese all over his chest and lick it off.

  60. brandy says:

    OMG. I feel stupider for having listened to that song. The 39 seconds of my life spent listening for as long as I could are gone forever.
    The only thing worse than the song is the picture!
    And wow, her dress, shoes, clutch and his tie are all ridiculouslt Gucci print… I… can’t… take… it…. anymore!
    Must leave thread STAT!

  61. Moongirl (Mrs Sender says:

    I can’t believe I was stupid enough to click and listen to that!!

    Its now going round and round my head in a torturous loop <img src="http://www.kickette.com/images/smileys/longface.gif&quot; width="19" height="19" alt="long face" style="border:0;" />